So Neptune is sitting on your couch...

[Jabberwock xeno]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

Been reading the percy jackson books?

Anyways, i'd ask why he's there, if he wanted anything, and if we could play a game of Halo.

The next book comes out in October and I fully intend to step over and/or on every child in my way to get a copy as soon as possible

I stopped reading them after book 5(?)

I intend to start again, but I'm not to keen in a change of setting/people.

Plus, i'm slightly angry at how Typhon came out as a pushover.

 

[psychodynamica]

"So.... You are a god, right?"
"yup"
"You Drink"
"yup"
"I got some Jaiger"
"sweet"
*Slowly pull a joint of my pocket, light it. repeat above steps 3 or 4 more times, go to bed.

 

[Not-here-anymore]

-pause, look around, look back at him, sit down next to him, wait a moment-
"You Neptune?"
"Yep."
-wait awhile longer-
"What are you doing on my couch?"
"Chillin."
-scratch head, wait-
"You like ponies...?

Something along those lines, but with fewer pony references. And more 'Why are you in my house?"

 

[rancher of monsters]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

Been reading the percy jackson books?

Anyways, i'd ask why he's there, if he wanted anything, and if we could play a game of Halo.

The next book comes out in October and I fully intend to step over and/or on every child in my way to get a copy as soon as possible

I stopped reading them after book 5(?)

I intend to start again, but I'm not to keen in a change of setting/people.

Plus, i'm slightly angry at how Typhon came out as a pushover.

A lot of the old cast is still around and the new guys aren't bad. Percy is going to be the focus of this next book though.

How was Typhon a pushover though? It took most of Olympus, and a bunch of Cyclops to finally bring him down right?

 

[Aiedail256]

*reads title*
The entire mass of planet Neptune compressed into something that can fit on my couch? That might be in black hole range...my house would collapse into it, surely!
*reads first post*
oh. nvm.

 

[Twilight_guy]

Hey, Neptune scoot over and give darkseid some more room.

Actually I'd probably ask "Do you know Aquaman?"

 

[Dango]

Get your feet off my table.

 

[CrazyGirl17]

I'd probably ask him how he got into my house, but I'd be polite and offer him something to drink.

 

[smearyllama]

Crack open a couple bottles of Appalachian root beer and watch Commando.
Maybe play some Resident Evil 5 after that.
I finally got the full DLC package to work after about a year or so.

 

[MegaManOfNumbers]

"Try not to ruin the new carpet okay? There's some leftovers in the fridge if your hungry."

 

[Mount]

"Oh sweet fancy moses, your toga's gapped open, PLEASE cross your legs!"

 

[Jabberwock xeno]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

Been reading the percy jackson books?

Anyways, i'd ask why he's there, if he wanted anything, and if we could play a game of Halo.

The next book comes out in October and I fully intend to step over and/or on every child in my way to get a copy as soon as possible

I stopped reading them after book 5(?)

I intend to start again, but I'm not to keen in a change of setting/people.

Plus, i'm slightly angry at how Typhon came out as a pushover.

A lot of the old cast is still around and the new guys aren't bad. Percy is going to be the focus of this next book though.

How was Typhon a pushover though? It took most of Olympus, and a bunch of Cyclops to finally bring him down right?

Cause he was only in for like, 2 and a half pages, not even.

It was "see typhon fighting through portal for 5 seconds" then a few chapters later "hades joins in, typhon is defeated".

 

[WaywardHaymaker]

I'd ask him if he wanted to co-star with me in a zany 80's sitcom.

 

[SwimmingRock]

Considering I don't own a couch:"Listen, man. I don't know where you got that couch and I don't want to know, but if the cops show up, I'm ratting your thieving ass out in a heartbeat."

 

[Canadamus Prime]

"Oh hey, glad you're here. Listen next time you're on Olympus can I ask you to have Aphrodite (or whatever her Roman name was) give me a call? I need to ask her a favor."

 

[darkonnis]

Probably ask him to prove it, which in hindsight may prove to be a dumb idea but i imagine you'd get:
"japan, that was me."
Too soon?

 

[tobi the good boy]

Is it bad I had a dream like this about 2 years ago

ot: probably say hi.

 

[Verlander]

I'd start up a conversation, almost definitely. And then I'd try and wrangle some cool powers out of him, like Storm or Iceman from the X Men. What, they involve water!

 

[MrJKapowey]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

Been reading the percy jackson books?

Anyways, i'd ask why he's there, if he wanted anything, and if we could play a game of Halo.

The next book comes out in October and I fully intend to step over and/or on every child in my way to get a copy as soon as possible

What, another one!?!

But the storyline was closed!

And the movie tie in was sheeyat!

 

[FalloutJack]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

O great Poseidon...what the heck are you doing on land?

"There is no law of nature or otherwise that states that I cannot."

Okay...why then are you on my couch?

"It is comfortable."

You're not gonna give me a straight answer, are you?

"No."

Right, so...was it you who sprang up in Vir-

"I DID NOT CREATE TREMORS BELOW THE LAND OF VIRGINIA!"

Alright, geez... Chill thyself out. So, how long were you planning on sticking around?

"I was thinking a fortnight."

You're paying the water bill, man.

"It is done."