So Neptune is sitting on your couch...

[rancher of monsters]

With a lot of religious questions starting minor flame wars on the Escapist I thought I'd make a more light hearted religion-ish thread. So suppose one day you come home from school/work/whatever to find Neptune, Poseidon, God of the seas, earthquakes, and horses, sitting on your couch. I don't mean a guy that kinda looks like Neptune. I mean toga wearing, sandals on your table, trident leaning against the couch, beard of ocean water, Neptune just flicking through the channels. How would you respond?

 

[silver wolf009]

I'd say hello and ask if he needed anything. I mean, hospitality people! Be polite and tend to your guest.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

"Damn it Neptune, get off my couch, you're nearly as lame as Aqua Man."

Then I'd proceed to make two cups of tea.

 

[tombman888]

"sup"
"not much"
"Whats on the tubes?"
"Not much"
"dats cool"
*proceeds to have regular day*

 

[worldruler8]

The fridge is there, I get back at 5, don't destroy the house if Zeus comes on by, I know how crazy he is with parties. if you need anything, just ask, mkay?

 

[Sgt. Dante]

"Dude, feet off the table..."

Other than that I'd probably be cool with him hanging out, unless he wanted to watch crap. Then we'd have words.

Offtopic; I'm not sure if OP's avatar is racist or i'm reading too mcuh into it...

 

[Rawne1980]

Oi Nep, make yourself useful and put the bloody kettle on.

And stop watching Desperate Housewives you big girl.

 

[wooty]

My guess is that he'd be playing God of War and picking through its historical inacurracies.

 

[Phantomess]

I'd shrug, ask him when he's leaving and how much of Sydney he's seen.

 

[Thaluikhain]

You'd be fucked. Any time a Graeco-Roman gods turns up, you get fucked, literally or metaphorically. The only exception seems to be when you are already fucked, and they wade in.

...

On the other hand, polytheisms tend not to fight over religion, so it might be a good thing in that regard.

 

[Miles000]

Say "Did you at least bring booze?"

Would probably just stare for a few minutes..... then quit drinking XD
....
Or drink more... Hard to tell.

 

[Scarim Coral]

First thought is that is outrageous!

Spoiler: Outrageous!

Yeah I know that Neptume isn't Aquaman but still.

I guess I would say "Err hello?". I would then proceed to ask him how he know about my parent assuming they let him in and ask what he is doing in my house? I mean of all the houses or places he could of went to watch TV from and he choose my house?

 

[Idsertian]

"Yo dude."
"Yo."
"Still part of a dead Pantheon?"
"Yeah."
"Sucks man."
*Plops on couch*

Then I would proceed to rapidly revise my view of the world and everything in it.

 

[rancher of monsters]

"Dude, feet off the table..."

Other than that I'd probably be cool with him hanging out, unless he wanted to watch crap. Then we'd have words.

Offtopic; I'm not sure if OP's avatar is racist or i'm reading too mcuh into it...

I really should just keep a written response to this question that I can copy and paste. Short version: Its cute, its ironic, I'm black, if anyone feels seriously offended then I'll change it.

 

[Tarkinor]

-pause, look around, look back at him, sit down next to him, wait a moment-
"You Neptune?"
"Yep."
-wait awhile longer-
"What are you doing on my couch?"
"Chillin."
-scratch head, wait-
"You like ponies...?

 

[Zarmi]

"Anything on the telly?"
"Nope."
"Shame. I'll boil water for tea, want some? Also got a few snacks."

 

[JamesStone]

"Sooooo, wanna play God of War?"

 

[teebeeohh]

ask him how he got in and if he want's anything?
then ask how they give out powers on mount Olympus, do you pick one (the sea) and another one is randomly assigned by lottery. And how got lottery in his department? is Dionysos always drunk are does he run on alcohol(like Bender)?

 

[rancher of monsters]

-pause, look around, look back at him, sit down next to him, wait a moment-
"You Neptune?"
"Yep."
-wait awhile longer-
"What are you doing on my couch?"
"Chillin."
-scratch head, wait-
"You like ponies...?

You know I hadn't thought about it when I posted, but since Neptune is credited with the creation of horses, he's technically the God of bronies as well. I guess I owe him a sacrifice or something.

 

[Jonluw]

I'd say "Hi there, Uncle Tusky. Anything good on the telly?"

[sub]See, because walruses live in the sea, and Neptune lives in the sea, so that makes... oh just fuck off.[/sub]