So you just found out you're God

[Brandon237]

Remove free will. The vast majority of people are too stupid to have it.
Of course my next job would be figuring out why if I am God did I make a planet full of utter jackasses in the first place.

Well, you assume that we have free will in the first place. Any sufficiently advanced system is indistinguishable from magic (free will).

ANYWAY, if I found out that I were God I would...

1. See if I could negate everything (including myself) from existence (wouldn't do it, would just see if I could).
2. See if I could make a rock so heavy I couldn't lift it.
3. Start making different universes.
3. Make 4 = 3.

I see what you did there...

I would first do all the important things, fix the world decently, and then have fun, jump off cliffs and try to land on pink sponges, get my girlfriend and I some damn peace and privacy, fly around on a giant hamburger roll, make an unstoppable force and immovable object and see what happens.

 

[noble cookie]

I would make a new planet and name it McFuckinAwesomePlace...not very imaginative but who cares.

I would make clones of Chuck Norris and send them to destroy earth.

EDIT: Have wings and teleport everywhere and make what i want...do everything.

 

[Kris015]

I would speed up the evolution on Titan.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

I would spread my mighty gaze around the earth in a carona of golden awesome. Ive had this day dream many a time.

I would probs fly about 300 feet up, transfixed by a pillar of burning golden light and proclaim my dominion over all of mankind. After that i think i would raise a collosal palace of rock pretty high up and live in there for a bit.

 

[Kris015]

Maybe make everyone on earth nymphomaniacs just to see what would happen >

 

[chinangel]

What's the first thing you do?

I would probably teleport myself to the sun, because I've always wanted to see what it looks like up close (I would be wearing sunglasses of course).

Likely abuse my power...maybe make the world all female and somehow solve the procreation problem...I don't know. /shrug.

on an unrelated note, what's your avatar from?

 

[3aqua]

I'd teleport to some far off star find a nice planet (something small and purple) and start over again. No offence intended to the other occupants of this messed up little blue marble of ours.

 

[Lord Nosferatu]

I'd slap humanity up the head to pull it together and stop being posterior openings, so we can finally get something done. Namely, colonize space.

 

[Sinclair Solutions]

I'd probably do something wacky, just to prove it to myself. Like make the animals of the forest build my dream home or something. Besides that, I would just continue on my normal life, manipulating my powers to benefit me whenever possible.

 

[Chairman Meow]

I would rally a worldwide revolution and watch as each government falls from massive riots and protests then give a go at being Emperor of Earth and create a GLORIOUS SOCIALIST UNION!

Then screw it up somehow...

 

[New York Patrick]

I would make every single one of you watch Troy .

All of you...

[small]Especially you...[/small]

You Basterd...

 

[Queen Michael]

What I'd really do is create a wonderful afterlife and make damn sure everybody gets to enjoy it once they've kicked the bucket. Life's too horrible to have any other ending.

 

[Tsunimo]

1: make myself a TarDis
2: mess with people
3: create advanced life on other planets

 

[Jedoro]

Make a list of dangerous criminals, from most dangerous to least dangerous, and go hunting.

 

[ejb626]

I would summon all relgious christian wacko fundies and tell them to stop it and that I wasn't amused with they're behavior. They'd probably finally stop if God told them to. I would also summon all the uptight atheist dicks and tell them to stop being uptight atheist dicks I guess.

 

[carpathic]

I think I would alter the speed of light, and make it possible for humans to travel further afield.

I think.

 

[ucciolord1]

I would rise up into the air, shoot lightning out of my arms and yell, " I feel everything! I know... I know everything! I am everything!

 

[Shoggoth2588]

The whole of creation would disappear as soon as I found out I am God. It would vanish in a puff of disbelief and astonishment. Twenty seconds later, everything would wink back into existence only there would be a wicked party going on.

 

[Callate]

Wonder why so many things on my creation were so screwed up in the first place. Try to go about fixing them, recognizing that a significant re-design of the human race might be in order in the process.

A week or so in which guns pointed at humans don't fire and explosives aimed at humans don't go off might be a good start.

I'd like to lengthen the human attention span and inspire impatience only with over-simplified explanations that cater to the what the listener already wants to believe and/or their worst impulses (cable news would be out of business in a month.)

I'd create an easily accessible, non-monopolizable, non-wasteful, non-harmful infinite energy source and see if people just found something else to fight about.

Oh, and anyone who tries to kill anyone else in the name of Me is going to have a stroke. The first one won't be so bad. Keep it up, you're going to end up a vegetable.