Testicles - Let's talk about 'em

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Palademon

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Mar 20, 2010
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I got kicked hard by a twat as his way of rejecting my joining of a group hug involving him and two girls.

It hrut for days.
But then I realised he had actually missed my balls and bruised my pelvis.
 

TheHecatomb

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May 7, 2008
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Had an acute testicular torsion [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Testicular_torsion] when I was 14 years old. The pain was well, I honestly can't describe it. Not even in my first language, let alone in English. Was just barely in time for surgery, too. Another 2 hours and my balls would've gone byebye.
 

niege

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Aug 16, 2009
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A girlfriend of mine threw a baseball in my groin but i have substained many hits there by skateboards so i am almost imune these days :D but the one that was worst was when a guy touched me there
 

imnot

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Apr 23, 2010
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Strangely i dont feel inital pain, I get a headache, feel sick and nearly faint, yes I Know im broken.
 

PrototypeC

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Apr 19, 2009
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Yeah... girls, imagine pain so bad you want to vomit, in twin tubes of pain all the way up to right below your chest. OK? It's NOT FUNNY.

It's been years since I was a victim of a scrote assault, but more than once I've been present when others got hit really bad and lay there in agony while people were laughing. Laughing!
One guy even... broke one...
 

MrShowerHead

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Jun 28, 2010
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niege said:
A girlfriend of mine threw a baseball in my groin but i have substained many hits there by skateboards so i am almost imune these days :D but the one that was worst was when a guy touched me there
....what?

Touched? I'm sorry, but I smell a funny story here :D
 

Owlslayer

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Nov 26, 2009
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Soccer, soccer, soccer- the king of all ballshots. (get it ? Neither do i!)
And yes, it really really really REALLY hurt.
 

Hoopybees

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Jun 22, 2010
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I went out with a dude who liked it. That was one particular fetish I was too freaked out by to cater to.
 

Serge A. Storms

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Oct 7, 2009
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Once when I was little I was walking across a metal bar on a playground set, slipped, and it was just like in a fucking cartoon; one leg went one way, one leg went the other, and my whole body went stiff.
 

niege

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Aug 16, 2009
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MrShowerHead said:
niege said:
A girlfriend of mine threw a baseball in my groin but i have substained many hits there by skateboards so i am almost imune these days :D but the one that was worst was when a guy touched me there
....what?

Touched? I'm sorry, but I smell a funny story here :D
Well we had gymnastics and me and a friend ran in to each other and took down four other people making a pile and when HE was rising up he grabbed them, talk about that feeling was weird
 

Stickill

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Jan 1, 2010
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Never had a kick down there, nor a ball or whatever.
Most painful thing I had was riding over a huge gap in the road with my bike, crushing the bollocks when the bike went up again.

Btw, reading this topic makes me laugh, because of the huge amounts of words for balls people use.
 

DesiPrinceX09

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Mar 14, 2010
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I've been sack tapped by one of my American friends before for the lulz (seriously why the hell do Americans do that!?) but prabably one of the worst ones ive gotten is when my dad was playing tennis and he swung his racket back and hit me square in the nuts so he could get a good hit, he hit a ball alright just not the one he was aiming for. Another was in science class, we played a science themed jeopardy game and I knew the answer to the 1000 point question at the time but so did he and I was about to say it and the fucker back handed me right in the balls to prevent me from answering and they won by cheating and the teacher didn't do or say a damn thing.
 

Argtee

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Oct 31, 2009
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I almost got shot in the testicles with a paintball the first time I went paintballing.

Luckily, I only got shot in the penis, but it still hurt like hell!

I honestly can't remember the last time I've been hit in the testicles...
 

Oh That Dude

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Nov 22, 2009
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Ignatz_Zwakh said:
Okay, due to popular demand I'll explain how I've punched myself in the balls. ><

It was during a shift at the videostore I work at. The store had been empty for almost 2 hours and a coworker and I were bored stiff. Figuring there was no one in the store to offend, we slapped on some Protest the Hero and jumped around like idiots head-banging and flailing around. After about 4 minutes of this, a client came in the store. I panicked and kinda jerked my body and I dunno how, but my fist smacked my crotch. I literally fell onto my side and rolled around yelping. Twas a sad day. :(
Posting in epic thread with epic story. Also, PTH win.

Am I the only one who's ever accidentally sat on his own testicles? Extraordinarily painful.
 

tthor

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Apr 9, 2008
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my girlfriend was sorta playing with them one day, then 10 minutes later i was in horrible pain and could hardly walk >.>
 

Ren3004

In an unsuspicious cabin
Jul 22, 2009
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Well, I got hit by footballs several times... Damn my lack of sports ability making me always be the keeper. I must have made more saves with my balls than with my hands.