The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)

[Pm0n3y]

Back in the middle-ages...

Phil examined Rag wings, while Rag starts to get slightly annoyed.

"Wha' ar' ya' doin'? Ge' fro' behin' meh!" Rag says

"Sorry man, your wings just look so cool! But how come GOD didn't tell me about there being another angel in this universe?" Phil asks

"Maybe thi' i'll answer ya' question" Rag says, raising his arm.

On it was his H.a.L.O, but it wasn't glowing the way Phil's was. Instead it was dim and black, and cracked in some spots.

"Ya' see: wen' ya' become a fallen' angie', ya' H.a.L.O ge's deactivated, sinc' a fallen' angie' ca' become a' demon easier tha' a regula' angie'. n' other' words', i've fallen of' th' radar, ta' avoid detection fro' th' opposing forces. Git it?

"Yeah, i got ya" Phil says.

 

[Sam G]

"Bwah! 'Kay, I'm up..." Death said, finally waking up after being asleep for the last 70 or so posts.
"Bwah! I, too, am awake..." said Livingness, also waking up. He looked around, and failed to see any of the other heroes. "Where'd the rest of the guys go?"
"Umm... I don't know. D'you think, maybe... They just left us?" Death asked, worriedly.
"Nah, they wouldn't do that!" Livingness reassured his cousin. "I mean, they couldn't just abandon us! After all, where would they be without the comic relief?"
"What, you mean they abandoned Orgazmo, too?"
"No, ya damn fool!" Livingness cried, mercilessly beating his cousin with a crowbar. "I mean, not as recently..." He straightened up, glanced over at the body of a dead locust commander, and waltzed over to him to steal his keys. "Off we go, Death! To rejoin our allies!"

 

[Ramthundar]

"Oh, so we have two Angels sent by the gods to this world, Ehhh?" Ram asked with a knowing smile.
"Um, I ain't tech'ny was sen' by 'no gods, mah fur'eh friend..." Ragnorak began to say, but Ram quickly shushed him.
"Oh, so you were sent down here to help the great heroes of this world fight against man-kind?" Phil asked Ram with an innocent and excited grin.
"Umm....."
In the Mighty Halls of Vahalla, A Time Ago...
"You summoned me, Lord Thor?" Ramthundar asked, in his Warrior-Angel form.

[HEADING=1]HEY RAMMY! How's mah favorite servant doing?[/HEADING]
"The appreciated term is "Guardian Spirit, Oh Lord. And you summoned me for some important task?" he said though grit teeth, narrowly dodging the ale that was being hap-haphazardly thrown around by the drunken god.

[HEADING=1]Hmmm? OH yeah, I need yah to head down to one of the Earth's in this one reality, needs some "special help," yah know?"[/HEADING]

"You...wish me to help out a set of mighty heroes, and lead them to glorious victory for the name of the Norseman?Ramthundar asked, a glimmer of hope and joy appearing in his eyes for this first time in eons.

[HEADING=1]Well, no, when I said 'special,' I meant...the world is a bit...weeeeell....Let me put it like this: If the various realities of Earth were vehicles, this reality's Earth would be the short, yellow bus that requires extra-padded seats and requires helmets for all passengers, some of whom already have them.[/HEADING]





"Yeah....sent to help out mighty heroes..." Ram muttered, not looking into Phil's eyes.

 

[maddawg IAJI]

Maddawg quickly got up and tackled Xandus.

"Link quickly stab him!" Said Maddawg punching Xandus in the face.

Link took out his sword and held it over Xandus' face. He held it above his head and turned away with his eyes closed. He quickly put the sword down and threw it across the floor. He then took his sword and hit Maddawg in the face with it. Maddawg got off of Xandus clutching the spot where the shield hit.

"Dude what the hell!" Said Maddawg grabbing his jaw.

"Link you-you didn't kill me." Said Xandus to Link.

"I think...I think you broke my Jaw." Said Maddawg trying to move the broken chin into place.

"Of course I didn't! Your the greatest Master/Step-Father ever." Said Link to Xandus.

"Great. JUST FUCKING GREAT! I don't even think my Healthcare provider has even been created yet to! And I left my wallet back in 2009!"

"Your the greatest Apprentice/Adopted son ever! I love you my son!" Said Xandus hugging Link.

Maddawg looked at the two hugging men and just stared at them. "Ok....Uhhh I'm just gonna take this machine here and uhhh....get my jaw wired shut...." Said Maddawg running from out of the cave.

 

[The_Chief]

"so where are these "mighty heros" you speak of ram? are they over there? i bet its the big guy with the sword and the...oh he's dead. bummer. lets take his shit!"


"what did i say about looting laz0r? do you want to end up like Orgazmo?"

"No Ma'am."

[HEADING=1]WHEN SUDDENLY[/HEADING]

A fleet of ships from the movie "independence day"(the alien ships) blew up the tavern!"

 

[Sam G]

"Fleet? That may be a slight exaggeration..." Livingness said, hopping out of the ship he'd stolen from that dead locust. "Hey all," he continued, waving at the heroes.
"Hiya!" Death said, letting go of the landing gear he'd been hanging on to and falling to the ground.

 

[Pm0n3y]

"Um... where exactly are we?" Phil said, confused at his surroundings.

This question started general conversation amongst the heroes, for none of them knew where they were, or what time period they in for that matter.

Spoiler: Hmmm...

slow day today, isn't it?

 

[Ramthundar]

"Wait! I have a way of devining our location!" Ram cried.
He then bent low, muttering arcane words. Swells of magic flowed from and around him, casting a slight glow to outline his figure. Soon his muttering turned to a loud chanting, little bursts of magic emitting from his body. He finnaly raised his head, and stared at a passing soldier.
"Oy, mate." he said, all magic dropping and chanting gone. "Where the hell are we?"
"Why, you're in the town of Anvil of our great country, Cyrodil!" the guards exclaimed with a cheery British accent.
"Sweet. And I'm guessing with the ye' ole' attire, we're in the past. So try not to screw up so much here, one tiny action now could completely mess up the future, like....it could have....what might happen..." Ram tried to say, looking at the rag-tag group of fallen angel, lazor dogs, cows, regular angel, Death, and thought of the random adventures they've already had.
"...yeah, do whatever you want. Just don't kill a species or wipe out a culture or anything, k?"

 

[Hollow Grimm]

MEANWHILE...

Grimm began to walk to where he last seen Maddawg, (Using his Magical mind powers, Of course).

"EVIL VILLAIN CORPORATION" Said by, A Unknown man..

Grimm kicked down the door, Sending it into the man.. (None other than Xandus of course! :'})

"COUNT ME IN"! He yelled out.

 

[ajb924]

"I wonder who that is..." Sho mumbled to himself as he saw grimm walking somewhere in the distance. "I'll follow him!" When Grimm busted into the tower and Sho heard what it was and grinned. "This is just what I was looking for!"
"Who are you!?" Someone asked Sho
"Call me Sho, and from now on, I'm in your guys's group!"

 

[Nexus424]

Meanwhile in the outskirts of time and space

*Sigh* "They didn't listen to you Cosmos. They warped time again and stopped a chain of events that would have stopped the destruction of the world." The Time Dragon said in a heavy tone shaking his head.

"I tried to warn them but I guess there is no choice. I am more of a negotiator to show them what is wrong with what they are doing but I guess force it all that matters." Cosmos said in a sad tone.

"Heh heh heh heh. Ah ha ha ha ha. It's my turn this time. And they wont escape from me with out casualties." Reckoning said with a large grin.

"Don't leave just yet." The time dragon said to the towering blood red wyvern. "Prepare your self as they are powerful."

"Don't make me laugh. I am one of the only Wyvern's in existence with powers. But fine I shall prepare for battle. They'd better be ready as I have no time for mercy."

Reckoning stomped of into the stars breathing streams of black fire making sure he would be ready. For when he is called he knows there is always hell to pay.

"He scares me sir. There is a reason wyrvens were not meant to have powers like us." Cosmos said shaking a bit.

"I know but that's the main reason he was able to claw himself into my ranks. He messed with time itself to strengthen himself and when I went to go pursue him he gave me the scar you see here." The Time Dragon replied showing the slash over his right eye.

"What!" Cosmos replied in shock. "That was him who gave you that scar."

"Indeed. If I had no control over time and space he would have beaten me that day. But instead of finishing him off I offered him a job. I only hope that he doesn't go into his old habits before going on a job." The Time Dragon said observing the world. He looked over the group of people causing the ruckus.

 

[Hollow Grimm]

"XANDUS YOU ASS"! Grimm yelled out before grabbing him by the throat and slamming him into the wall...

"I cant kill family"... He said..

Xandus grabbed grimm by the arm and did a reverse turn and slammed his face into the wall.
"You freaking stupid man.."! Xandus yelled.
"IM NO MAN"!!! Grimm said, "I IS A CAT...thing"!!!

Grimm then kicked Xandus in the gut..

Maddawg walked over, "Why are you to fighting"?
Xandus walked away, "No reason.. Now go, All of you.. Get the job done"!

 

[maddawg IAJI]

Leyawin, Cyrodil

"OOHHHHH I love to murder cat people! I love to hear there bones break in two! I love to murder Cat people! I love to use there pelts to wipe my po-"Sang Revan before he was interuppted by Maddawg.

"Knock it off man. We need to play it cool!" Said Maddawg motioning for Revan to stop.

"Halt travelers! What be your buisness here in Leyawin!" Said the Guard at the gate.

"Where just here to kill all the cat people. Maybe complete a quest or two if we have time."

"...Well I don't see anything wrong with that. Now I just need to ask a couple of questions.

1) Do you have any illegal fireworks?"

"Yes. I MEAN NO!"

5 Minutes later.

"SON OF A-" Said Maddawg sitting in a jail cell.

BACK AT THE GATE!

"Okay question 2. Are you Vampires?"

"Well I'm kinda a creature of the night." Said Dark Link.

5 minutes later

"THIS IS BULL-" Said Link from his cell.

Back at th-You know what? Forget it. You proably know how this is going so will just fast-forward a half hour.

"BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND! How being circumsized be a crime!" Said Grim yelling out of the cell while the others played Poker behind him.

 

[Pm0n3y]

Back in Anvil...

The heroes decide to grab a bite to eat in the kings castle before deciding any business. All of sudden Phil walks into the main dining hall after coming from the bathroom, and approaches the heroes.

"Ok everyone, it seems to me that the villains has just announced some exposition for our next adventure" Phil says, zipping up his pants.

"Um, ok." Ram says chewing on a mutton leg.

"So where is it?"

"Where's what?"

"Y'know, the Dragonfire Amulet of Akatosh, the very same thing that a villain was talking
about a few posts ago?" Phil said

Hearing these words has caught the attention of one the guys in tights, and he leads the heroes to room, containing aforementioned magical stone.

"Um...sugoi?" Phil said referencing the girl from before.

 

[Ramthundar]

"Soooo, we accidently ended up in a different dimension for no particular reason other then a powerful amulet is here with veryous people who know turned out to be our enemies?" Ram asked the tights-wearing man.
"Well, I suppose it could of been Fate, tugging at the strings of the universe to direct you to this-"
"Sorry, that was a retorical question with the answer of We Kick Ass!
"Or it's just lucky that we happen to be hit by the same time-travel mojo that hit the villains. I wonder who else was hit...."

Meanwhile, Several Miles Away...

"By the gods, what is the odd Structure?" Wilbur the Farmer asked his wife as they stared at the massive, square thing.
"I don't know...the symbols appear so odd...." she replied, looking up at the massive sign that proclaimed [HEADING=2]Walmart[/HEADING].
"Wait a minute...Fire Amulets 3 for only 5 gold? What a deal!"

And now my conquest begins...anew.

 

[Nexus424]

Meanwhile in the outskirts of time and space

"Ah perfect, the offenders are all together. Reckoning quickly after them." The Time Dragon bellowed opening a portal.

*Hic* "Hold your horses I'm comin'. Freakin lazy ass time dragon. Doesn't wanna take care o infidels him *hic* self." Reckoning mumbled.

The wyrven slinked into the room large bags under his eyes. A bottle of whiskey it his right wing.

"Argh what happened to my liquor." Cosmos screamed from his section. "Reckoning!"

"Ah shut it Cosmos. Like you e'er drink it." Reckoning called out from the main chamber.

The Time Dragon shook his head and thought to himself.

God Dammit Reckoning. Every single time you get a little job you celebrate with drinking. I've got no choice he still has to go.

"Well hurry up. And try not to screw around you drunk bum. You'd better sober up before you get there." The Time Dragon scolded.

"Ah quite your whining it was just a little sip *Hic*. I'll be sure to take care of the peoples." Reckoning slurred as he headed into the portal.

With that the drunk powerful wyrven was on his way ready to do his job...sorta.