The worst thing to say at a funeral.

[Sick boy]

____ Is dead and he's still causing me trouble.
Words of my grandpa when my uncle died, basically because he payed for the funeral.

 

[Infernai]

"You know, i wish i'd burnt him alive instead of just stabbing him in the neck...oh well, i guess i'll try that on his wife next time-Oh shit, did i just say that out loud!?"

 

[TheTemby]

Self Centered- "Well atleast it wasnt me"
Stupid- "So when do we eat?"
First Timer- "Howd she/he die?"

 

[WhiteTiger225]

We have all had those moments when we just totally stuck our foot in our mouth and haven't even realised it until we see everybody elses faces change to a look of anger/confusion/pity. A lot of these moments it seems, happen when somebody has just died. Share some bad experiences or just be imaginative and think of the worst possible thing you could say after a recent death.

I would have to say "so it goes". It may be funny to the people that didn't know them, but it would just seem in poor taste to everybody else.

So.... Does this mean you're available?

 

[Sovvolf]

Hehehe I can see a nipple.

 

[goatzilla8463]

Sooo... Who are we mourning for again?

 

[ClaptonKnophlerHendrix]

Tell the mother/widow that your the deceaseds gay lover.
Or.. I'm disgusted to say it but... lean over to the guy next to you and say 'You know I'm really into necrophilia.'

 

[Cornwallpwns]

well at least i wont feel guilty when im sleeping with 's wife anymore

 

[the_duke_CC]

Vicar/priest/ceremony preformer :

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join, in holly matremoney, the hands of,...oh wait sorry wrong que cards."

that would rate pretty high on a list of worst things to say at a wedding if you ask me

 

[Gauntes]

I guess he failed his Fortitude save

hm...

 

[inflamessoilwork]

pwnd

 

[NimbleJack3]

'This wonderful man would come every day to my clinic and ejaculate into a cup for charity.'

Tell the mother/widow that your the deceaseds gay lover.

Cookie for the Death at a Funeral reference. That thing is a goldmine for this thread.

 

[Christemo]

I am glad ____ is dead.

Its not clever, but then again it doesnt have to be.

i would only say that to 1 person, and i wouldnt even attend that *****´s funeral. id be like "MWAHAHAHAH, THE ***** IS DEAD, EVERYONE IS HAPPY! COOKIES ALL AROUND!"

on topic: "just bury him/her, would you? i have to play FIFA with a friend in 30 minutes".

 

[Manji187]

ahh...your silly average "try to be funny in a hypothetical situation" thread...good luck everybody...you won't have the balls to do it in real life...and really you shouldn't. Guess you never heard of the phrase "respect the dead".

 

[NintenTim64]

He/she may not have lived fast or died young but jeeeez...that is one good lookin' corpse!

 

[messy]

Did he drop any good loot?

I apologise

ahh...your silly average "try to be funny in a hypothetical situation" thread...good luck everybody...you won't have the balls to do it in real life...and really you shouldn't. Guess you never heard of the phrase "respect the dead".

Respect the dead? There not here any more (what ever way you look at it) I don't think they care. Hell when I'm dead my body can be paraded naked through the streets (on second thoughts that might make it to the will). Also there just jokes not aimed at a particular person more of a general concept.

I realise you may have just experienced a loss your self, if so sorry, but that doesn't stop this being funny

 

[Hookman]

"Swings and Roundabouts!"

 

[Pink_Pirate]

"lol, pwned!"

 

[PureChaos]

'sucks to be you'