There is a big Turkey Preventing me from getting to my car for lunch!

[Sethzard]

Cut off it's head, then take off it's feathers, gut it and cook it.

 

[CultistRat]

Turkeys are weak against fire. Instant lunch.

 

[GrinningManiac]

F*CK

SH*T

WHO LET THE DOOM-TURKEY OUT OF ITS CAGE?

DELETE THE PHOTO. THE IMAGE OF A DOOM TURKEY BECOMES A DOOM TURKEY (or something like that...)

I'm afraid this is it, gentlemen. The Doom-turkey has escaped. Not even jesus riding on the back of Cthulu using a nuclear submarine for a club can defeat that thing. The Apocalypse is nigh

It's been fun

Buenos Noches

this one understands. you cant out intimidate a creature that gobbles naturally. i mean for gods sake it GOBBLES man! GOBBLES. What other creature does that?!

The best thing about Turkeys is that they are one of the few animals who always respond when you do a poor imitation of their call. Try it. Next time you see a turkey, just go "Goobagoobagobbagobba!" and they do this

 

[wildpeaks]

Activate VATS and aim for the head

But seriously, you may manage to get around if you distract it with food.

 

[Eldarion]

whatever you do, GET IT ON CAMERA!

^

Then post another thread about what happened. Oh and please try to kill it with fire, I would pay to see that.

 

[Eliam_Dar]

get an axe, eat the turkey... problem solved

 

[Virus0015]

It's a turkey. Use a modicum of bravery to circumvent said turkey and gain access to car.

Whilst humorous, I don't think you needed to make a thread about dealing with it

 

[2fish]

F*CK

SH*T

WHO LET THE DOOM-TURKEY OUT OF ITS CAGE?

DELETE THE PHOTO. THE IMAGE OF A DOOM TURKEY BECOMES A DOOM TURKEY (or something like that...)

I'm afraid this is it, gentlemen. The Doom-turkey has escaped. Not even jesus riding on the back of Cthulu using a nuclear submarine for a club can defeat that thing. The Apocalypse is nigh

It's been fun

Buenos Noches

this one understands. you cant out intimidate a creature that gobbles naturally. i mean for gods sake it GOBBLES man! GOBBLES. What other creature does that?!

The best thing about Turkeys is that they are one of the few animals who always respond when you do a poor imitation of their call. Try it. Next time you see a turkey, just go "Goobagoobagobbagobba!" and they do this

Yes they gobble, but this may be useful, try to gobble to the doom-turkey. Tell it your bosses name and car. It may hunt your boss down for you. Assassin Doom-Turkey!

 

[Indiscrimi]

This is the best thread I've ever seen on these forums. I am laughing my ass off. Good luck dude.

In reply to your question: Kick it...then you should probably run away 'cause it will most likely be pissed off. You don't want to mess with a pissed off turkey.

 

[AntiAntagonist]

Euugh reminds me a guy who saw a live wild turkey and picked it up off the ground. He received a beak gouge that took weeks to heal.

If it's addressing you then you are probably near its nest or territory. Circle around to the car.

 

[chrono16]

I think it can smell my fear.

Oh it can. You'll be trying to sleep tonight, thinking that it's all over between you and the turkey, when you'll hear a beak tapping at your window...

LMAO.. i read that and choked on the turkey sandwich I was eating...

 

[adderseal]

This is absolutely hilarious! It's like one of those completely bizarre yahoo answers that get compiled on websites.

 

[Sennz0r]

Oh, you shouldn't mess with those things. there's no telling what kind of infections those claws and beak are carrying.

Can't make a break for it?

Still hilarious though.

 

[Sebenko]

I think it can smell my fear.

Then teach it that the smell of fear is actually the smell of imminent ass-kicking.

Then teach every other fucker.

 

[Rolling Thunder]

Cowardice in the face of Emperor's enemies is punishable by execution, Conscript. March out there and die with honour fight in the Emperor's name!

 

[esperandote]

Wait for thanksgiving day

or

Out run it

 

[Exocet]

Slide tackle it,choke it and put one of its feathers on a hat.