What is being homophobic?

[tautologico]

Some funny comments in this thread. "You're not homophobic, because I feel just like you and I'm certainly not homophobic".

Sorry, it is an homophobic reaction. This doesn't mean you're a bad person, it's just that in some subconscious level you either have a problem with actual "gayness" (instead of the theoretic gayness when you know someone is gay) or you're insecure about your own identity. As people have already said in this thread, this is something that is programmed in us by our culture, and if you become aware of it you can work to improve.

As a teen I also thought that male-male displays of affection were kinda iffy, even though I didn't have a problem with other couples (man-woman or woman-woman). So I realized that yes, this was a kind of prejudice, and I stopped feeling like this.

One problem with discussing this stuff is that if you tell someone he/she has a prejudice, many people will jump to the conclusion that you're saying he/she is a bad person. It's not like that, everyone has prejudices and we need to be aware of them to be able to improve. In the great, great majority of cases these prejudices are the result of cultural programming that is outside our control, and not due to malice or being a bad person.

 

[101flyboy]

I think the phenomena of having nothing ethically wrong with homosexuality and yet being disgusted by it has to do with the 'mirror neurons' we all come equipped with. The same neurons that makes your skin crawl when you see a spider crawling up someone else's arm. It's not on your arm and yet you can almost feel it there, inching it way up...

When heterosexual men see two women kissing, their mirror neurons put them in the place of one of the two women; and since they are heterosexual and find women attractive, they are therefor having a heterosexual experience; imagining themselves kissing a girl. However, with the male couple, their mirror neurons are imagining themselves kissing a man, and since they are not homosexual, the idea is repellent for some.

That would explain why you consciously have no problem with homosexuals but a subconsciously repulsed by seeing them be romantic with each other. Your mind is inserting yourself into the mix and making you imagine that it's you. Fun when it's girls involved, not so fun with guys. You just need to learn to recognize that and control it so that it doesn't bother you. It's just down to personal discipline.

Great post. This is a lot of it.

I do think that the "I'm disgusted by people of my gender" mentality has to also come into question. You can find men unappealing, sure..........but you're a man yourself. If you find yourself attractive you're a man who finds a man attractive. Doesn't mean you'll find other men attractive. But do you look in the mirror and find yourself repulsive and dirty? That's a question people need to ask themselves too. Men aren't inherently repulsive, women aren't repulsive.

 

[101flyboy]

What part of "according to the NPD" do you not understand? Is English not your native language? Should I link you to google translator?

I get it, I was just saying that they're wrong. Nothing more, nothing less.

Such as?

Contracts that are recognized by some parties and not by other parties. Contracts that have value in one state and not in another state. Or contracts that have value in one district, yet not the other.

"To a point" means I'm covering my ass, because you know somewhere on this website there's someone that would quote me and rant on about how being able to love openly without limits means soon we'll have two men fucking on the sidewalk in front of a school.

"To a point" means the same point heterosexual couples can't cross in public. Nothing more, nothing less.

OK, cool.

Well, by the looks of it, I'm not the only one seeing this in your posts, so whatever...

I admit I'm pretty abrasive. I'm straight forward. I'm also pretty tired so I'm not thinking totally straight. I apologize. I can be less gawkish.

 

[Abomination]

There is a difference between "this does not compute" and "this is disgusting".

When both generate the same reaction/feeling it doesn't matter.

Also kissing/hugging isn't really homosexuality. Homosexuality is sex. Kissing is a kiss. Hugging is hugging. Hand holding is hand holding.

Homosexuality is only realised at point of fornication? Sorry, that's absurd.

Same-sex hand holding, opposite sex kissing, it's the same thing with different gender combinations. We need to separate affection from sex. I'm not turned on or off by a man and woman kissing. It's a non-starter. Thinking it's disgusting is taking it to a different level.

I am more than happy having different levels of affection being shown towards others. Are you saying that a boob grab isn't sexual because no sex is involved? Or maybe grabbing a man's crotch as a form of greeting? Is the line only drawn at penetration?

I do not like watching a man kiss an ugly girl the same as I do not like watching a man kiss a man. I find it unattractive because I am not attracted to ugly women or men. This is not homophobic, this is personal tastes. Just because a homosexual person doesn't find heterosexual couples kissing unattractive does not make my stance homophobic. I am certain the reason it is not disgusting to most homosexuals is either because it is simply a social norm or because it is kind of the way how people are made... unless homosexuals are somehow able to spawn children from their pairing since last I looked.

 

[ninjaRiv]

A good friend of mine said this, after we found out asnother good friend came out: "I love the guy but he better not put it up my ass."

This, in my opinion, is a perfectly valid response to a homosexual of the same gender as yourself. Ok, obviously it's not exactly... Elegant but the point I took from it is you don't have to enjoy watching two dudes make out to support gay rights. That kind of suggests only gay people should be for gay rights, right?

I mean, I enjoy watching Fight Club, Tarantino flicks, playing nasty video games, etc but I'm not a supporter of violence.

Homophobia, in my opinion, isn't about not wanting to watch, participate, etc it's about not wanting to let others do it. Telling them they can't do that shit. Maybe there's gay people out there thinking "man, being straight is fucking gross." That doesn't matter. It's ok to hate seeing a couple of gay guys kissing. It's not ok to think they can't. If you think they're not allowed to do that, that's when you need to look at the way you see things.

Don't pay any attention to the people here saying it's not cool.

snip

Don't let people like this guy (sorry, Rebellion dude, just using you as an example) tell you you're sick and wrong. I mean, going by their logic, he's sick for not accepting you. That idealism is a very vicious circle. "You're sick because you don't like this." "Well, you're sick because you don't like that I don't like this." Well, ffffffuck that. What are you supposed to do? You, I and many others in this world have grown up with and taught by people who truly are homophobic, racist, sexist, etc and I think we do pretty well considering. So... Yeah, that was a rant and a half, right?

Conclusion
It doesn't matter if the sight offends you, disgusts you, etc. It only matters that you leave people to it. That you support their rights like you support other rights.

 

[101flyboy]

When both generate the same reaction/feeling it doesn't matter.

It matters. One reaction is of indifference. The other is a negative response. People should strive for indifference, because if you find nothing wrong with homosexuality at all, then you shouldn't have a problem with same-sex couples showing low/moderate levels of affection, the same way opposite-sex couples do. If you do have a problem with that then you subconsciously have internalized issues that you're projecting on an innocent action.

Homosexuality is only realised at point of fornication? Sorry, that's absurd.

Homosexuality is an extension of the word homosexual, which is characterized as a sexual desire for the same-sex. Homosexuality is the actions and state of being of that desire. That's why people don't identify as homosexuals, we identify as gay, because homosexual doesn't fully encapsulate a persons' sexual orientation.

What you're saying seems to be that the mere inference of homosexuality between two people of the same-sex causes people problems. And that is not healthy nor rational, because it's baseless and it's negative.

I am more than happy having different levels of affection being shown towards others. Are you saying that a boob grab isn't sexual because no sex is involved? Or maybe grabbing a man's crotch as a form of greeting? Is the line only drawn at penetration?

All of those actions are sexual. But we're not discussing sexualized actions. I'd be caught off guard having someone grab my crotch when they greet me. Or seeing a coworker touch a woman's boobs when they meet. But we're talking about low to moderate levels of affection. So why do you keep jumping to sex and these aggressive acts? It's like that's where you put same-sex affection, you consider it in the same realm as touching someone's boobs. And that speaks to the internalized issues you have towards homosexuality.

If I'm wrong, let me know.

I do not like watching a man kiss an ugly girl the same as I do not like watching a man kiss a man.I find it unattractive because I am not attracted to ugly women or men.

You keep repeating this and I continue shooting it down easily. You don't like to see an unattractive girl kissing a man because she is unattractive. Which is a quantifiable reason to not want to see someone kissing. That is taste. Not wanting to see a man kiss has nothing to do with your taste. It's because you're straight.

This is not homophobic, this is personal tastes. Just because a homosexual person doesn't find heterosexual couples kissing unattractive does not make my stance homophobic.

It actually does, which is what most people are saying. It is homophobia. And it doesn't mean you're are definitively a homophobe. But your stance is inconsistent. And it's inconsistent due to homophobia and the fact you can't seem to help but connect same-sex kissing to sexual activity.

I am certain the reason it is not disgusting to most homosexuals is either because it is simply a social norm or because it is kind of the way how people are made... unless homosexuals are somehow able to spawn children from their pairing since last I looked.

Yeah, so basically, homosexuality isn't natural. That's what you're implying, right? Seems like it. Maybe you meant it that way, maybe not, but when we get down to it, that's more or less what a majority of people are subconsciously thinking when they protest same-sex kissing. And it is a homophobic mentality.

 

[Shadowstar38]

Homophobia is not just fear, it's an irrational aversion and hatred/discrimination. It's bias, it's the "I accept homosexuality as long as they're way over there" mentality. It's outright hatred. It displays itself in many different ways with different people. What studies show is homophobia is generally based on insecurity and insecurity is a fear based trait. You may not be directly scared of homosexuality. Or of gay people. But homophobes have a wall up with gay people. And they are scared of breaking that wall because they have internalized issues with homosexuality they can't deal with. They then project those issues on homosexuality rather than addressing their own issues. That's why homophobia is dying yet still a severe problem. It's *completely* irrational. It's completely based on abstract feelings, not logic. More so than racism or misogyny.

From your posts, it seems like you think the OP and people like him should feel bad for the feelings they have towards this. Really, I think it's perfectly fine. You can't change who you are and how you react to it. If he's not taking time out of his day to disrupt homosexual love, he's a perfectly healthy individual.

 

[Tragedy's Rebellion]

another snip .

It doesn't work that way. The difference is you (people with homophobic tendencies, not you specifically) dislike and are disgusted by something which is ultimately positive, namely love between people, and something they CAN'T change. While you preach tolerance for the intolerant which is completely absurd and wrong.

And as we mentioned countless times it is enough to hide your true homophobic, racist or sexist thoughts for other people. That is not what is ultimately being discussed here, the OP specifically asked if his situation makes him a homophobe and it DOES. It is up to him or you to do whatever you want with that information - you can still live in the dark ages with all the scary and gross gays around or you can truly be an enlightened person who holds no irrational aversions and in the end being a more secure and confident individual.

That is all we have been trying to say.

 

[ninjaRiv]

another snip .

It doesn't work that way. The difference is you (people with homophobic tendencies, not you specifically) dislike and are disgusted by something which is ultimately positive, namely love between people, and something they CAN'T change. While you preach tolerance for the intolerant which is completely absurd and wrong.

And as we mentioned countless times it is enough to hide your true homophobic, racist or sexist thoughts for other people. That is not what is ultimately discussed here, the OP specifically asked if his situation makes him a homophobe and it DOES. It is up to him or you to do whatever you want with that information - you can still live in the dark ages with all the scary and gross gays around or you can truly be an enlightened person who holds no irrational aversions and in the end being a more secure and confident individual.

That is all we have been trying to say.

But he's not being intolerant. He's simply reacting.

But maybe I'm wrong. I'm absolutely cool with watching people do that with whatever gender! It's all good! It's just how I think things are. You can be tolerant and accepting but something you just can't change so much.

 

[101flyboy]

Don't pay any attention to the people here saying it's not cool.

It isn't cool. That's just how it is. It doesn't mean you're a bad person for thinking this way, it doesn't mean you're anti-gay, but is it *cool* to believe more or less the love two people have for one another of the same-gender is disgusting? No. It is not cool. If you don't impose said view on gay couples, that's good. You don't deserve a medal for that. We should all strive to be the best we can be and that means striving to eliminate irrational biases we have. Ultimately you won't be as close to these gay friends you have as you could be because you have a wall up and that wall isn't necessary.

Don't let people like this guy (sorry, Rebellion dude, just using you as an example) tell you you're sick and wrong. I mean, going by their logic, he's sick for not accepting you.

Wow. Hahaha. That brought a laugh.

Why should people accept irrational negative biases if they aren't irrational, and don't have negative biases? They are the ones that people such as your friend and the OP should strive to be like. There are no two sides to this coin. There is a reasonable way to look at things and an unreasonable way to look at things, and you're being unreasonable and being pretty aggressive in justifying yourself. When like 10-12 people are saying the same exact thing then maybe it's not them with the issue..........it's you.

That idealism is a very vicious circle. "You're sick because you don't like this." "Well, you're sick because you don't like that I don't like this." Well, ffffffuck that. What are you supposed to do? You, I and many others in this world have grown up with and taught by people who truly are homophobic, racist, sexist, etc and I think we do pretty well considering. So... Yeah, that was a rant and a half, right?

No-one has used the word sick. You're too defensive. You seem offended for being called out (theoretically speaking) on something that other people have no issue with. It's not an attack on someone's character to call something out for what it is. For highlighting one aspect of your train of thought and showing you why that train of thought is irrational. It's not calling you a bad, sick person.

What are we supposed to do? Take responsibility for our problems and do our part to overcome them rather than make excuses for them. Excuse making and deflection is the easy way out. And if anything is offensive, that is. Because it shows a person has no willingness to better yourself, and it's a slap in the face really to those that DO make the attempt and are successful. Instead of being defensive, be realistic. Defensiveness usually solves nothing.

 

[Fdzzaigl]

Well, I wouldn't call you "homophobic" OP. I can see where you're coming from and though I wouldn't say that seeing sexual acts between two men disgusts me, it is not something I find appealing or even something that I prefer to see either. That's simply because, like you, I'm heterosexual and my preferences lie elsewhere.

It's also why lesbians intermingled as such are appealing to me: they're still women engaging in sexual activities, loose of the fact that they're lesbian they still appeal to me because they're women.

For me, "homophobic" means that you have certain prejudices or fears regarding homosexual relationships, it has nothing to do with actually being interested in the sexual aspect of those relationships or not yourself. For example, I would classify someone claiming that homosexuals are "a danger to society" or "a perversion of the normal man-women relationship" as homophobic.

 

[101flyboy]

From your posts, it seems like you think the OP and people like him should feel bad for the feelings they have towards this. Really, I think it's perfectly fine. You can't change who you are and how you react to it. If he's not taking time out of his day to disrupt homosexual love, he's a perfectly healthy individual.

The thing is, that several people in this very thread have said they have changed. I personally have changed. I was personally uncomfortable with same-sex affection when I was younger and I grew out of it. I personally know people who were EXTREMELY uncomfortable with it who grew out of that discomfort in college. That's a cop out. We can understand, work on and fix our biases, if we're willing to address them and work on them, repress them. The issue is that some here are more or less saying they don't care about working on them, or they don't want to work on them, because they don't find their negative biases bad. Although they are. Just because they aren't imposed on a gay couple doesn't mean it's not negative to have negative bias towards same-sex couples for being same-sex couples. That's not perfectly healthy. Perfectly healthy would be not having such biases in the first place. Non-perfection would be having low-level bias or bias that you're controlling and repressing and growing.

Simply having a bias and then throwing your hands up and saying "oh well" is not perfectly healthy. Does it make that person a bad person? Not at all. It means they have a negative thought process they should seek to eliminate or soften. So that they *can* be completely comfortable around their gay friends.

 

[ninjaRiv]

Don't pay any attention to the people here saying it's not cool.

It isn't cool. That's just how it is. It doesn't mean you're a bad person for thinking this way, it doesn't mean you're anti-gay, but is it *cool* to believe more or less the love two people have for one another of the same-gender is disgusting? No. It is not cool. If you don't impose said view on gay couples, that's good. You don't deserve a medal for that. We should all strive to be the best we can be and that means striving to eliminate irrational biases we have. Ultimately you won't be as close to these gay friends you have as you could be because you have a wall up and that wall isn't necessary.

Don't let people like this guy (sorry, Rebellion dude, just using you as an example) tell you you're sick and wrong. I mean, going by their logic, he's sick for not accepting you.

Wow. Hahaha. That brought a laugh.

Why should people accept irrational negative biases if they aren't irrational, and don't have negative biases? They are the ones that people such as your friend and the OP should strive to be like. There are no two sides to this coin. There is a reasonable way to look at things and an unreasonable way to look at things, and you're being unreasonable and being pretty aggressive in justifying yourself. When like 10-12 people are saying the same exact thing then maybe it's not them with the issue..........it's you.

That idealism is a very vicious circle. "You're sick because you don't like this." "Well, you're sick because you don't like that I don't like this." Well, ffffffuck that. What are you supposed to do? You, I and many others in this world have grown up with and taught by people who truly are homophobic, racist, sexist, etc and I think we do pretty well considering. So... Yeah, that was a rant and a half, right?

No-one has used the word sick. You're too defensive. You seem offended for being called out on something that other people have no issue with. It's not an attack on your character to call something out for what it is. For highlighting one aspect of your train of thought and showing you why that train of thought is irrational. It's not calling you a bad, sick person.

What are we supposed to do? Take responsibility for our problems and do our part to overcome them rather than make excuses for them. Excuse making and deflection is the easy way out. And if anything is offensive, that is. Because it shows you have no willingness to better yourself, and it's a slap in the face really to those that DO make the attempt and are successful. Instead of being defensive, be realistic. Defensiveness usually solves nothing.

Oh, I'm... PRETTY close to this gay friend, man.

Actually, That Rebellion fella said sickening. That's what I picked up on.

Anyway, I see your point but I disagree. Striving to be the best you can be doesn't mean you need to change this shit. People can be disgusted by two guys kissing. If he told them they shouldn't be doing that or if he thought it's morally wrong, then he would be a bit shit as a person. Then I'd say he needs to look at his way of thinking. I just think it's nowhere near a big deal if it's a turn off for him. But he wasn't talking about the love, he was talking about the actual kissing. Personally I hate public displays of affection of any kind. Fuck that.

 

[101flyboy]

Well, I wouldn't call you "homophobic" OP. I can see where you're coming from and though I wouldn't say that seeing sexual acts between two men disgusts me, it is not something I find appealing or even something that I prefer to see either. That's simply because, like you, I'm heterosexual and my preferences lie elsewhere.

It's also why lesbians intermingled as such are appealing to me: they're still women engaging in sexual activities, loose of the fact that they're lesbian they still appeal to me because they're women.

For me, "homophobic" means that you have certain prejudices or fears regarding homosexual relationships, it has nothing to do with actually being interested in the sexual aspect of those relationships or not yourself. For example, I would classify someone claiming that homosexuals are "a danger to society" or "a perversion of the normal man-women relationship" as homophobic.

You made good points, but Aaron wasn't discussing sex. He was talking about mere inferences that two men like each other. And basic affection between two guys. If he were talking about sexual activity, that would be a different ballgame. If he said "I don't like seeing two men stick their tongues down each other's throat", that's one thing. Effectively saying male-male homosexuality is completely disgusting to the point you want to have a seizure is.........homophobia. You can have homophobia yet not be homophobic or anti-gay.

 

[Shadowstar38]

From your posts, it seems like you think the OP and people like him should feel bad for the feelings they have towards this. Really, I think it's perfectly fine. You can't change who you are and how you react to it. If he's not taking time out of his day to disrupt homosexual love, he's a perfectly healthy individual.

The thing is, that several people in this very thread have said they have changed. I personally have changed. I was personally uncomfortable with same-sex affection when I was younger and I grew out of it. I personally know people who were EXTREMELY uncomfortable with it who grew out of that discomfort in college. That's a cop out. We can understand, work on and fix our biases, if we're willing to address them and work on them, repress them. The issue is that some here are more or less saying they don't care about working on them, or they don't want to work on them, because they don't find their negative biases bad. Although they are. Just because they aren't imposed on a gay couple doesn't mean it's not negative to have negative bias towards same-sex couples for being same-sex couples. That's not perfectly healthy. Perfectly healthy would be not having such biases in the first place. Non-perfection would be having low-level bias or bias that you're controlling and repressing and growing.

Simply having a bias and then throwing your hands up and saying "oh well" is not perfectly healthy. Does it make that person a bad person? Not at all. It means they have a negative thought process they should seek to eliminate or soften. So that they *can* be completely comfortable around their gay friends.

I don't really mind if they have the bias as long as they're not being dicks about it. It's only natural to feel uncomfortable when you see homosexuals displaying affection. It looks unnatural. Being at a "tolerance" level is the most acceptable thing I could ask for.

 

[Abomination]

I do not like watching a man kiss an ugly girl the same as I do not like watching a man kiss a man.I find it unattractive because I am not attracted to ugly women or men.

You keep repeating this and I continue shooting it down easily. You don't like to see an unattractive girl kissing a man because she is unattractive. Which is a quantifiable reason to not want to see someone kissing. That is taste. Not wanting to see a man kiss has nothing to do with your taste. It's because you're straight.

This is not homophobic, this is personal tastes. Just because a homosexual person doesn't find heterosexual couples kissing unattractive does not make my stance homophobic.

It actually does, which is what most people are saying. It is homophobia. And it doesn't mean you're are definitively a homophobe. But your stance is inconsistent. And it's inconsistent due to homophobia and the fact you can't seem to help but connect same-sex kissing to sexual activity.

That is, again, absurd. It is a personal preference, a taste. Someone being male and someone being ugly are the exact same things when it comes to attraction - in that neither is attractive.

You seem to find it offensive or wrong that men do not find other men attractive and that being straight is somehow... faulty? Just as how it is not wrong to find men sexually appealing it is also not wrong to find them not sexually appealing. I do not like to watch animals engaging in the reproductive process because I do not find animals appealing in a sexual manner. I do not like watching men engage in public displays of affection with each other (i.e. courtship, that which is used to LEAD to fornication) because I do not find men appealing in a sexual manner.

I can't believe I have to say this: there is nothing wrong with not being sexually attracted to men.

The reason for finding it unpleasant is due to not viewing men as sexually desirable, so witnessing two men engage in acts that - in the grand scheme of things - are intended to lead to fornication is also not desirable.

Because it shows you have no willingness to better yourself

There is little willingness because it will NOT better themselves. What someone finds sexually attractive or sexually disgusting affects NOBODY other than the individual. The very thought that you believe less of someone for their likes and dislikes towards sexuality make you just as bad as any supposed homophobe.

 

[ninjaRiv]

I do not like watching a man kiss an ugly girl the same as I do not like watching a man kiss a man.I find it unattractive because I am not attracted to ugly women or men.

You keep repeating this and I continue shooting it down easily. You don't like to see an unattractive girl kissing a man because she is unattractive. Which is a quantifiable reason to not want to see someone kissing. That is taste. Not wanting to see a man kiss has nothing to do with your taste. It's because you're straight.

This is not homophobic, this is personal tastes. Just because a homosexual person doesn't find heterosexual couples kissing unattractive does not make my stance homophobic.

It actually does, which is what most people are saying. It is homophobia. And it doesn't mean you're are definitively a homophobe. But your stance is inconsistent. And it's inconsistent due to homophobia and the fact you can't seem to help but connect same-sex kissing to sexual activity.

That is, again, absurd. It is a personal preference, a taste. Someone being male and someone being ugly are the exact same things when it comes to attraction - in that neither is attractive.

You seem to find it offensive or wrong that men do not find other men attractive and that being straight is somehow... faulty? Just as how it is not wrong to find men sexually appealing it is also not wrong to find them not sexually appealing. I do not like to watch animals engaging in the reproductive process because I do not find animals appealing in a sexual manner. I do not like watching men engage in public displays of affection with each other (i.e. courtship, that which is used to LEAD to fornication) because I do not find men appealing in a sexual manner.

I can't believe I have to say this: there is nothing wrong with not being sexually attracted to men.

The reason for finding it unpleasant is due to not viewing men as sexually desirable, so witnessing two men engage in acts that - in the grand scheme of things - are intended to lead to fornication is also not desirable.

Because it shows you have no willingness to better yourself

There is little willingness because it will NOT better themselves. What someone finds sexually attractive or sexually disgusting affects NOBODY other than the individual. The very thought that you believe less of someone for their likes and dislikes towards sexuality make you just as bad as any supposed homophobe.

I think the point you're trying make, Absy (can I call you Absy?) is that you're seeing this topic from a totally lustful position. Correct? I see a lot of mention of love but I don't think that has anything to do with it. Two guys kissing is a turn off for you. Hands are a turn off for me, for some reason. And feet.

 

[101flyboy]

I don't really mind if they have the bias as long as they're not being dicks about it. It's only natural to feel uncomfortable when you see homosexuals displaying affection. It looks unnatural. Being at a "tolerance" level is the most acceptable thing I could ask for.

I don't care about people having the bias if they're not horrible about it, either, but the problem is most people cannot help themselves. That's why it's a problem. The dirty looks and blatant look aways are noticed, and they're hurtful to same-sex couples. And that shouldn't be. *If* a person has their biases under control that means they probably know it's wrong. It goes hand in hand. If you don't think having said bias wrong then you're always going to have it.

There is nothing unnatural about same-sex couples displaying affection. You believe it to be unnatural because it's not the norm. That's social constructs at work. And given double digit people on this very page have said they do not find it unnatural or off-putting, there isn't any reason not to work on your biases. It's about bettering yourself. It's about not creating a potential offensive situation. It's about taking an unnecessary burden off of your back. There is no *reason* to have this bias so you should want to rid yourself of it or at the very least get to the point it doesn't affect you.