What NOT to do! EVER!

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Sn1P3r M98

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May 30, 2010
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Never use axe or lynx spray as fuel for a paper fire when it's a windy day. It's worth waiting until a calm day.
 

Jezzascmezza

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Aug 18, 2009
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Don't look at crap on the internet that you suspect could be disturbing.
It probably will be.
In the case that you stumble across something disturbing, don't look at it twice.
I learnt this the hard way...
 

Hristo Petrov

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Nov 11, 2009
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Never talk about Shin Megami Tensei Lucifer's call to a religious fanatic for some reason they really get offended by this game

Never tell a girl " I really like you but I can't stand that fat retarded sister of yours"
 

Lucifron

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Dec 21, 2009
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Don't listen to people telling you not to go to Encyclopedia Dramatica's "Offended" page, it really is a great resource if someone has hurt you because of your sensibilities.
 

Sir-jackington

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Aug 12, 2009
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Walking home at the end of the night when you're unbelievably drunk, a number of things can happen such as:
-Sleeping at a bus stop (bad back the next day)
-Trying to trade your phone for a burger at McDonalds (did get a free burger because they wanted rid of me)
-Waking up in the lobby of an apartment building (walked in the wrong direction)
-Breaking into a random house and taking a nap on a couch
-Waking up in a strangers garden
 

GudangGaram

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Jul 16, 2010
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Pouring water over a frying pan when the boiling oil has just caught fire, so there is an explosion.

Dropping a lighter (filled with gas) just below the fire pit, because you panicked when the frying pan full of boiling oil caught fire, so the lighter explodes.

Pouring a pot of water over a puddle of burning Mineral turpentine on the floor, so it spreads out really fast and reaches your feet.

Chipping wood without safety goggles on. That means eye-surgery, if there is still hope that is.

Never play Super Mario Bros Wii with people you intend to keep as friends

Never play Battletoads on the NES with someone you intend to keep as a friend. In fact, remove all sharp objects even if you are playing alone.

Never play Rescue Rangers on the NES with someone you intend to keep as a friend. You can pick each other up and throw them in a cliff.

When a police officer asks you if that's a sword on your back, don't tell them your backpack is also full of illegal weapons
 

Rhymenoceros

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Jul 8, 2009
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Don't feed the Yau-Guai

Erm. Don't get tricked into trying to go down a black run when you have never ski'd ever
Lot's of falling over. Lot's of pain.
 

Lawnmooer

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Apr 15, 2009
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Don't spray deodorant onto your friends crotch and set it alight, as funny as it is you really don't want to know that someone's "treasure trail" when burning smells like pop-corn.

Don't snort exploding candy... seriously don't.

Don't drink a 7th can of energy drink because your bag is too full of them (I lost consciousness when I came down off the caffiene)
 

Brandon237

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Mar 10, 2010
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hyperhammy said:
savandicus said:
OR more seriously never remember something funny in an exam, trying insanely hard to supress a laugh in a completely quiet exam hall is pretty freaking hard.
LOL, this happend to me too. In my class I'm still that guy that burst out laughing in math class.
In Science once, we had subs and we had to keep dead quiet, now my friend and I being the brilliant people we are start writing on this piece of paper, I wrote upside down so he didn't have to turn it. We wrote some funny crap, but it got to milking the duracell bunny, we laughed under our breathes for the whole lesson, poor bunny... The teacher was one table away from us, the whole class could hear us... The day they realised I was Crazy...
 

Yarpie

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Jun 24, 2010
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Never put a sock in a toaster. (kudos to anyone who knows where this is from)

Also, never try doing six shots in ten minuets when you have a fairly low tolerance for alcohol. I swear the world was doing pirouettes as I walked home.

Also don't have a "who can pee the longest" contest with a full bowel while wearing white sweatpants. Thankfully I only witnessed this, however my friend ended up having to navigate through the forest in order to not be seen while heading home. On the same note, if you are really desperate to get to your house, make sure you remember when your family moves from one house to another. My friend didn't on this very occasion.