What would you say if you were an NPC?

[Artemis923]

"The path to the north is blocked by ice. You'll need the FIRE ROD."

 

[partfluff]

I wouldn't say anything - I would just swallow my pride and take off my pants.

 

[dmase]

"bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb...." repeated indefinitely until the person gets pissed and cuts off the game but sits there for an hour because they haven't saved after an hour of playing just to see if there is a chance in hell that it will fix itself. The glitchy npc everybody's favorite.

 

[Korten12]

I would say "Press B to jump." lol.

 

[Ultracake]

llNpctalk(3,"npc_ultracake","I am ultracake, And i must now return to my home planet");
llNpcblastoff(5000,699,243,offset_explosionlaunch);
llNpckill(o);
;
;;


...Lol...

 

[DragonsAteMyMarbles]

"Everything is falling into place... soon ultimate power will be mine!"

"Hi, I'm Jack... and I'm Jill. We're schizophrenic!"

"Would you like a jelly baby?"

 

[zerzxes]

"So, taking pictures of your junk. I see you're using the wide angle lens."

Unskippable referance ftw!

OT:
"most people have evil spirits. You? You have stupid spirits, gp see shaman. Get hole in head"

cookie for referance!

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

"If you want me to move you will have to show me your boobs" oh yeah

 

[t0mba]

"Why are you wasting your time talking to me when there are floating coins over there?"

 

[Bob the Average]

I'd have to go with some sort of bait and switch like:

i've lost my dog can you help me find him.
...
...
OR I'LL EAT SOUL!"

 

[DragonsAteMyMarbles]

"So, taking pictures of your junk. I see you're using the wide angle lens."

Unskippable referance ftw!

OT:
"most people have evil spirits. You? You have stupid spirits, go see shaman. Get hole in head"

cookie for reference!

Fallout 2, talk to Sulik with less than 4 Intelligence. Grampy Bone tells him you're retarded.

 

[Sable Gear]

"I AM ERROR"

"No, I'm not plot-related. Have a nice day!"
or
"Yes, I AM plot-related, come talk to me later."

 

[Desert Tiger]

"SPEAK GOD DAMMIT. JESUS CHRIST!"

 

[NotAPie]

"I fucking hate mutes...."
or.
"What is the purpose of the goggles?"

 

[Jedamethis]

I'm annoying, so probably

"SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!
SPAM!"

 

[John_Galt]

"Fucking commies..."

 

[silasbufu]

"quit the game and go outside ffs"

 

[Guitarmasterx7]

depends if I'm unkillable or not. If I am, I would taunt the player and call them a pussy, and challenge them to fight. Then taunt them as they hack and slash at me futilely. Then I would throw in some rude remarks as they're walking away when they inevitably give up.

If I am killable then I would be like "hey, wanna see something cool?" Then break the coding so that 100 of the strongest monsters in the game appear and then kill them right before they kill the player with laser eyes. Then I would be like "Don't fuck with me"

 

[COR 2000]

If i were to be an NPC, then I'd try being this guy. [http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2009/3/30/]

To the OT: I'd actually say: "Their leader's mute, they've got no strategy! Take them down, they'll be no challenge..."

 

[Go Fighting In The War Room]

Give me some tropical fruit bubbalicious. And some skittles.
-If I were any GTA cop.