Women and 'sensitive' men

[fletch_talon]

I

Ahem. It appears your rant is made of fail, sir

Indeed. It was bashed quite heartily.

Indubitably old chum, one could surmise that the poster of such a topic is rather butthurt. One could also venture to say that the term "butthurt" could be applied in the literal sense. I am of course referring to a phony "nice guy" coercing a party or parties into the act of anal sex, thus perpetuating a rather dismal view of the male populace.

For the record, physical strength in modern society means very little. I have yet to fight off contenders for "my woman" whereas I frequently use my empathy and sensitivity to comfort my girlfriend when the world has got her down. Now I will not be a pushover, don't get me wrong, but in public I don't believe I project a sense of "dominance" I believe my persona is determined by my mood the environment I'm in and the people who approach me.

And in the end it was my compassion and ability to open up and share deep conversation that gained me a better half. Neither strength nor dominance came into play.

 

[DoW Lowen]

So men, really think twice before you claim you treat men and women the same. Because do you really?

... Yes?

Spoiler: The Longer Response

I understand theres the argument that subtle preconceptions exist in everyone's mind that influence their interactions with everyone but I can't help but think you've taken that argument incredably far out of proportion. It's also not strictly a sex based argument, people have preconceptions about everyone they meet as basic as if your hair is uncombed you are lazy.

What I find most interesting about this thread is why you felt the need to write it. Theres a subtle hint of aggression in the post that makes me think somethings happened to really illustrate this concept in your life (probably within the last 72 hours) that sparked your revelations and subsequent proclamations.

Can I take a guess? It's late and I'm feeling bold. You're Mr. Nice-guy, a girl you've been eyeing recently paired with Mr. Chick-magnet and it upsets you that instinctual physiological drives would compell her to make this mistake? Half-way through your post you realized there was an important intellectual point to expound upon that was tangentially related to the issue at hand, namely that the vast majority of men (although, not yourself presumably) are sexist in minor unacknowledged ways and that the human condition is really a grisly thing and people are essentially barbaric in thier instincts?

Am I close? I suppose the truer question would be, instead of guessing blindly, to ask why you felt the need to post this. I don't know why but I'm curious. You can ignore me I you like, I won't take offense.

Actually to be perfectly honest the main reason I'm writing this is for research for a Gender and Sexism report for social studies. That story you mentioned was true about a few years ago though, an accurate analysis albeit a bit late. These could very well be repressed feeling and I'm really not be sarcastic, but if you must know the original intention was academic, the mind has a way of hiding from it's owner and if you could see it than it may be very well what you think. Oh and between you and me simply because everyone posted already will not be back, people would say these are generalizations, I'm just leaving all the references out. I don't know if I believe all these things or not, right now I'm just studying them. But I can understand everybody's immediate reaction. Still one girl was quite mean just now... really sucks to be me at the moment.

Hope I answered you're question.

 

[Puzzles]

I really can't believe how angry everyone gets over a little rant.

DoW Lowen, I get the feeling that it isn't that you just made generalisations about males, it's that you did it in an arena where most of the males are not the typical jock type at all (YES! I do generalisations too, give me a break it's a whole lot easier to explain this way).

If I were to make an educated guess, most of the guys here are quite introverted or reserved or similar in that way, maybe with a couple of close friends rather than a large amount of aquaintances who they cannot be themselves around. You can't just tell them they are jocks, because that isn't what they are.

If you brought this up around a sporting crowd, you might get a different reaction, but it would probably be "Durrr, yeah I'm a manly man.".

Appologies for generalisation.

 

[Deathsong17]

Any girl who would rather me be an egottistic prick than a generally nice person can go to hell. Who says I can't be a man if I dont pour testosterone from my ears? Or are you basically saying that if I treat my girlfreind with more love than my freinds, then I'm sexist?

 

[hansari]

You're making an awful lot of generalisations and great leaps of logic there.

I behave in near enough the same way around both my male groups and female groups of friends (as I'm not currently dating anybody), in fact I'm probably more open and emotional around my male friends because I feel like I don't have to put on as much of a show around them as I do my female friends, where I make a greater concious effort to be more sarcastic, funny and generally confident.

I don't see being a bit emotional in front of my male friends as weakness at all. Maybe you just don't have very good friends but when the time calls for it everybody in my group of mates has had sensitive problems and everybody is always there to talk to them about it and help them through it. We're not a bunch of bro-fisting, nerd punching arrogant jocks you know.

I was gonna post something, but this is me...

To emphasize the second paragraph more, drop these "acquaintances" and meaningless facebook friends. Go find real people with common interests and similar sensibilities. You can connect with people like that on such a deeper level. You will look over to them and think "Yes, I would have this mans back during the zombie apocalypse..."

I pity those of you who have never experienced a bromance. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lL4L4Uv5rf0]

 

[Florion]

While this rant could be a very detailed and insightful view on some male/female male/male friendships, it really doesn't apply to all of them. All male->male confessions mean more than male->female confessions? I don't think so.

 

[Baron Von Pants]

I think that what he said had to be said. This does sum up to many people in this world, it's kinda sad really. To me a man takes responsibility for his actions, takes care of the people in his life (friends and family), tells the truth.

I have been with women who love the "I am everything that is man" act. I have come to one conclusion about them, they are shallow, and the guy that acts like that is just as shallow.

 

[MK Tha Rebel]

Long rant.

Firstly, you make horribly sweeping generalizations on topics which you don't sound particularly well-studied in.

Secondly, and more importantly, your rantings make you sound painfully alike to a sexually frustrated teenager who's jealous of the guys that get the girls. You're trying to demonize them just because they're better with girls than you.

Rather than posting a long-winded whine on an internet forum about it, go and speak to girls more. It'll actually make a change, for one thing.

My thoughts exactly. You beat me to it.
Really, whatever point you were trying to make with all this, it just comes off as complaining.

 

[Babypummeler]

Make me a sammich. I mean.. Actually im also a doormat... but my friends like having a servant, and i like being their servant, only person ive ever dated turned out to be a druggie and very abusive... strange how things work.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

...doesn't describe me. I'm open and honest with men or women, simply because relationships are more rewarding that way.

 

[Meemaimoh]

This is just an extrapolation on the old "nice guys finish last" maxim, which is utterly ridiculous. Nice guys do fine in life. Doormats, who may or may not be nice but unfailingly call themselves such, do extremely poorly.

Why? Women like confidence and assertion. That has nothing to do with how men treat other people and everything to do with how they treat themselves.

A lot of men don't value a woman's opinion, which is why they are not generally afraid to show them weakness.

In my experience, this is actually often true on a generalised level (men will roll their eyes a lot at the female population at large, as will women), though often it goes out the window in a personal context. Nonetheless, I think this has very little to do with why men tend to feel more comfortable being emotional about women. I believe that's mostly to do with a decreased fear of judgment.

To tell the truth, I believe most of what you're claiming is simply a reflection of how you personally see women, and you know what? I don't care if you're a "nice guy" or a "jerk". I wouldn't date you in a million years, and I don't think many women would, because you've clearly got some issues nobody would want to deal with.

 

[Cakes]

What is this I don't even...
So many generalizations.
So much bullshit.
I just can't...

 

[Catchy Slogan]

Why would I want to go out with a guy that acts like a prick? As a general rule, I tend to try to avoid those kind of people in the first place. If the people don't like who I am, or how I act, then I don't hang out with them. Simple. Gender doesn't really make a difference to me.

 

[Pots]

 

[The_Prophet]

After reading your post, I have come to the following conclusion:
You are a very very sexist person, and you likely made this topic in an attempt to rationalise that sexism by making out that everyone else was sexist too.

Yeah, this pretty much sums it up. Also, DoW Lowen, go away and never come back. This was pretty stupid.

Wait, thats a bit heavy mate. Even if there are some big generalisations, I'd rather read this than nothing at all, or another f**king list thread. Don't toss away the potential for some decent conversation just because you took a little bit of offense.

True, true. This one is actually better than anything we've had recently. Still, I think it's a bit stupid.

 

[Spitfire175]

This is a baseless, generalising and narrow minded rant. Best to ignore it if we want to have a debate on the matter.

 

[Lunar Shadow]

I

Ahem. It appears your rant is made of fail, sir

Indeed. It was bashed quite heartily.

Indubitably old chum, one could surmise that the poster of such a topic is rather butthurt. One could also venture to say that the term "butthurt" could be applied in the literal sense. I am of course referring to a phony "nice guy" coercing a party or parties into the act of anal sex, thus perpetuating a rather dismal view of the male populace.

For the record, physical strength in modern society means very little. I have yet to fight off contenders for "my woman" whereas I frequently use my empathy and sensitivity to comfort my girlfriend when the world has got her down. Now I will not be a pushover, don't get me wrong, but in public I don't believe I project a sense of "dominance" I believe my persona is determined by my mood the environment I'm in and the people who approach me.

And in the end it was my compassion and ability to open up and share deep conversation that gained me a better half. Neither strength nor dominance came into play.

Is it bad that I read that entire thing with a Posh Brit accent?


Ot: Too many generalizations mate. If it were true I wouldn't be tired right now, and I am a nice guy.

 

[eels05]

Real men dont write long assed thread topics about relationship stuff like the OP did.

Are you a man or some chick like that chick off Sex in the City or something.

Huh?

 

[manicfoot]

How the hell did you manage to be sexist against both sexes?