Worst moment with the opposite Sex?

[Monkfish Acc.]

After reading through the entire thread(yes, that's right, go me), I was gonna post my experience, but after typing it all out, I realised it's far too revealing, and pretty unbelieveable. I don't want to seem like one of those lying, attention-seeking types, so instead I'll just say that everyones stories are hilarious/beyond tragic, and ask that the authors of the more grotesque storys put their posts in spoiler tags.

Yes, that's my entire contributation. Telling you I'm withholding a story, and then throwing in a generic, pointless post. What of it?

 

[Stryc9]

In high school after about two weeks of having this girl that I liked do just about everything she could to get me to ask her out we finally start going out and the first time we kiss in the morning be fore class, we're just starting to get into it and she's practically shoving her tongue down my throat when her Choir teacher walks right past us and without missing a beat slaps me on the back and gives me a big grin and thumbs up. I don't know about her but that just creeped me out because he was old. Then later one of the crossing guard ladies yelled at us for saying a very non-verbal goodbye at the end of the day.

Also my friend's wife gives great massages and every once in a while I get her to give me one, at first she didn't heat the massage oil up, and I offered to let her handcuff me if she'd just heat the oil up, awkward few moments but we all ended up laughing about it.

 

[jacobschndr]

I remember this time I was giving this girl a ride home from a party. She and I had just met a few days earlier through one of my friends girlfriends' but anyway, on the ride home we're going down this highway talking about other people, laughing about other people etc. When I begin to notice a really bad smell. I thought it must had been roadkill on the side of the highway like a skunk or something and I didn't say anything because I didn't think it was appropriate with company there. So I just ignored it and kept driving. A few minutes later it came back, So I looked over at my passenger and she looked back at me with a bewildered look on her face like she smelled it too.

I said, "Well, that sure does fucking stink doesn't it?" She hestitated for a moment and said back to me, "yeah, it must be a skunk or something". I thought there must have been a massacre of vermon on hte highway that night so I kept driving. We finally arrive at our destination, her apartment complex. She got outta the car, said it was nice talking to me, in a really quick manner mind you, proceeded to get out of sight real fast. Then, as I was putting the car into gear to back out of the spot the smell came back, then it donned on me.

SHE HAD FARTED THE WHOLE WAY BACK HOME!! And got dammit did it stink, before I thought it was a bad smell of nature nothing too rotten, but once I learned it was from her and to make matters worse she tried to hide it from me the whole time made it unbearable. I mean come on when your with company you don't do that (unless your with friends that your comfortable with I mean") or if you can't hold it in at least warn me when you did it. Christ.

The real funny part is, I ended up dating her for a whole year.

That is until she was leaving for another college, and I ended sleeping with her friend who actually introduced us to begin with ( you know my friends girlfriend). But she was leaving, the relationship was gonna end, I thought "it doesn't really matter who I'm with now" Beside this other girl DIDN'T HAVE A SMELLY ASS

 

[Zykon TheLich]

After reading through the entire thread(yes, that's right, go me), I was gonna post my experience, but after typing it all out, I realised it's far too revealing, and pretty unbelieveable. I don't want to seem like one of those lying, attention-seeking types, so instead I'll just say that everyones stories are hilarious/beyond tragic, and ask that the authors of the more grotesque storys put their posts in spoiler tags.

Yes, that's my entire contributation. Telling you I'm withholding a story, and then throwing in a generic, pointless post. What of it?

You teasing swine! You can't say things like that and then just leave it hanging, we want to know dammit!

 

[BakaSmurf]

After reading through the entire thread(yes, that's right, go me), I was gonna post my experience, but after typing it all out, I realised it's far too revealing, and pretty unbelieveable. I don't want to seem like one of those lying, attention-seeking types, so instead I'll just say that everyones stories are hilarious/beyond tragic, and ask that the authors of the more grotesque storys put their posts in spoiler tags.

Yes, that's my entire contributation. Telling you I'm withholding a story, and then throwing in a generic, pointless post. What of it?

Dude, NOT COOL MAN. You can't just tease us in such a way and then leave us in suspense like this! It's torture! You must tell us now! For the love of *Insert religious deity of choice here* man, PLEASE!

 

[the jellyman]

I was talking to an older girl about a play I was in, and one of my friends decided that this would be the bet moment to shout 'Oy (name witheld)! chatting up a bit of pussy?!' I have been less embarrassed, but not while sober.

 

[Ryuzix]

I'm pretty lucky and unlucky at the same time. My friend played a prank on a girl at my girlfriend's school so its him vs all of them. I was at a party with people from my school and the other school (my friend was getting paid out by all the girls). I didnt know this at the time since I got Asian's luck and hooked up with the girl I liked and we were kissing/making out in the bathroom and he walked in on us because we forgot to lock the door *facepalm*. Pretty fucking awkward if you ask me because she's a close friend to the victim of the prank and...uhh...I'm not "allowed" to be his friend anymore.

 

[seamusotorain]

My ex-girlfriend and I were...'getting to know' each other early in our relationship...about halfway through her cellphone goes off in her pants (which are on the other side of the room). She rolled her eyes and actually got up to get it. That was only mildly upsetting. She's an ex for a reason.

The opposite happened to me, I had to listen to the Mexican Hat Dance for about 30 mins because she wouldn't answer her phone! Another time (same girl) Ipod was on shuffle, and of course an incredibly inappropriate song came up: "Purple Stain" by the Chillis...

"To finger paint is not a sin
I put my middle finger in
Your monthly blood is what I win
I'm in your house now let me spin"

Luckily, I don't have sex with people who I'm not completely comfortable with, so it wasn't too bad

I touched the breast of my best friends girlfriend... pretty horrid =(

I touched my girlfriend's hand while she was touching my friend's girlfriend's boobs. Man, that was a keerazy night

 

[Perfect-Insanity666]

Oh my god same for me!
Except the Bad relationship with friends part, she's in a really stuped long distance relationship :S

 

[Trucken]

Not really awkward, more a story of how thick I am.

Was out for a night on the town with a couple of friends, 2 girls and 2 guys. We went to this place called Stanley's where the lower floor plays rock and the upper floor plays dancemusic. All of them went upstairs to dance, I parked myself in the bar to listen to some rock and keep drinking.

After a while someone taps my shoulder. I turn to see a pretty average-looking girl. This is the conversation that followed:
She: "Hi!"
Me: "Uuh, hi?" Thinking 'who the hell are you? Do I know you?'
She: "Nice shirt!"
Me: "Oh, uh, thanks." Thinking 'who the HELL are you?'
She: "Are you here by yourself?"
Me: "Naw, I got a couple of friends upstairs." (Yes, I realize now what she meant)
*A minute or so of awkward silence*
She: "Well, you have a good time tonight!"
Me: "Back at you."
I sit in the bar confused for a few minutes until one of my mates comes over and I tell him my story which I still hadn't figured out. He stares at me with a blank look for a few seconds until he gets mad and screams at me "you stupid asshole, she wanted to FUCK!"

Well, yeah, that's my story. Pretty awkward when he told me and I figured it out. God I'm slow.

 

[SsilverR]

i dunno but there are so many times i could've gotten laid if i wasn't such a moron and spotted the signs sooner hahaha

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

You teasing swine! You can't say things like that and then just leave it hanging, we want to know dammit!

Dude, NOT COOL MAN. You can't just tease us in such a way and then leave us in suspense like this! It's torture! You must tell us now! For the love of *Insert religious deity of choice here* man, PLEASE!

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

I will let you know it involves a rocket, the president, and national security.
Fun times.

 

[RockInGreen]

There was this one girl I had quite a few worst moments with.
A little back story:
We were best friends for more than a year, she liked me I didn't like her in that way.. but I warmed up to her and started to like her. We started dating then uh oh. I've fallen for her. (This being a Middle School dating situation it wasn't too serious, we didn't even kiss.)

Number 1: Almost two months later she broke up with me a couple days before Valentines day. Over MSN. For my bestfriend. The reason for breaking up, she liked him more. Lots of pain in that one. We eventually got closer again then in three months they broke up. We were pretty much best friends again.

Now in Highschool.

Number 2: Our Highschool went through a Teacher's strike so during that time we hung out a lot. Played contact foot ball with a couple friends; it was girls versus boys; her and two other girls versus me and another guy. Her and I always blocking eachother wrestling eachother to the ground while the game was on, rolling, laughing, real chick flick shat.
We then spent more time alone, we made out, all kinds of PG 13 stuff. Had lots of fun. A week after all this went on, she got a boyfriend. Oh and to make things better the other guy we played foot ball with became her new best friend. I was out of the picture, she didn't talk to me for the rest of the year and then she moved to Ontario. Ouch.

It's been three years since all that and I still can remember it as if it was yesterday.

 

[johnman]

Had my eye on this girl for around a year, and when we finally hit it off i keep putting off asking her out, reasoning that i dont want to do it around all the dicks at schoo land her friends who would act all gay about it, you know what i mean. Well eventually she grows tired of this and ends it. A few weeks later shes out with some other guy, who she broke up with in january. We are still alright friends, but im still loooking for away in.

 

[Rensenhito]

I have one.
So I was 16 years old, it was the summer before my senior year in high school, and everyone but me was getting laid like there was no tomorrow. I go back to my hometown for part of the summer. I run into the only girl to ever invite me to a real party - "real" parties being the kind of parties where you get the cops called on you - and we hit it off. She had just broken up with her boyfriend - not a good sign, in retrospect - and I had been single for a year. So we go out for a month or so, and then she invites me over to her house one weekend while her parents are gone.
Long story short, we end up in bed together, doing appropriately inappropriate things to each other, and I'm about to - you know - seal the deal. I ask her if she has any condoms. "No." I ask her if she's on the pill. "No."
We end up still going out with each other for a while, but not going any further. About a month after that, she breaks up with me and starts dating some 22-year-old death metal guitarist. I saw one of his shows. He sucked.

 

[Cheesus333]

"I love you"

My confidence was not appreciated.

 

[christhe1der]

Holy crap... I most supprised at how this forum is still alive... I'm not sure why either. Maybe it just feels good to share this stuff? I mean, that's why I made it. Just an excuse to talk/ laugh about it.

 

[thebobmaster_v1legacy]

Probably having my girlfriend break up with me via letter. Granted, I wasn't giving her the attention/effort she deserved, but still, I wish she had been willing to do it to my face.