You have just been caught masturbating! What do you do?!?!?!?!

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AnkaraTheFallen

May contain a lot of Irn Bru
Apr 11, 2011
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Bara_no_Hime said:
smearyllama said:
In your current location, and in place of what you're doing right now, your parents/ friends/ significant other/ roommates/ whatever have walked in on you.

What do you say?
Do you try to beat around (no pun intended) the bush?
Tell us what your contingency plan is
Right here, right now, by the person who lives with me?

"Honey, would you like some desert?"

(me being the desert, just to be clear - cause we just finished dinner)
Damn... you beat me to every joke I'm going to make on these threads, lol

Secondly I'd just say 'What you were sleeping and I was bored... care to help me?' :p
 

Admiral Stukov

I spill my drink!
Jul 1, 2009
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Living alone. :3

Though hypothetically, assuming it is someone "I could see myself in", I'd just say;
Care to help?
AnkaraTheFallen said:
Damn... you beat me to every joke I'm going to make on these threads, lol

Secondly I'd just say 'What you were sleeping and I was bored... care to help me?' :p
Thanks for being a ninja Shock ;_;
 

AnkaraTheFallen

May contain a lot of Irn Bru
Apr 11, 2011
6,323
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Admiral Stukov said:
Living alone. :3

Though hypothetically, assuming it is someone "I could see myself in", I'd just say;
Care to help?
AnkaraTheFallen said:
Damn... you beat me to every joke I'm going to make on these threads, lol

Secondly I'd just say 'What you were sleeping and I was bored... care to help me?' :p
Thanks for being a ninja Shock ;_;
Umm... think you've got the wrong person, lol
 

Sacman

Don't Bend! Ascend!
May 15, 2008
22,661
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While still masturbating, Stare at them and walk slowly forward with my eyes wide open and my head cocked to the side stopping inches away from their face...

kinda like this... but even more homoerotic...
[img height= 300]http://www.houseofpain3.com/wlsnews/images/Kennelly_Mendelson_Stare_Down.jpg[/img]
 

Griphphin

New member
Jul 4, 2009
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Actually just had this situation this morning, funnily enough. I had the door locked, and my brother actually gets a piece of silverware to jimmy the lock open to jimmy it open (didn't notice the sounds as I was...busy xD).
I get presentable, walk out in the room and promptly ask him if "I need a fucking neon sign above my door that I'm masturbating for you to respect the locked door!?"

Don't think I'll have that problem anymore hopefully, but he's a slow learner lol
 

Kraj

New member
Jan 21, 2008
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Parents? they'd leave.
Friends? most of the female one's would probably make a joke or join in, the males well they'd freak and leave.
Significant other? she'd help me. ^_^
 

keve4433

Not totally insane....YET!!!
Dec 9, 2009
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People around these parts tend to know to give me a call before they come over. >.> On the off chance someone did I would probably just say "You shoulda called ahead, go away and lemme finish." then carry on. My mom has been blessed with a sixth sense that lets her know not to come into the downstairs apartment and my dad never comes down here so I don't need to worry about that to much.
 

Yureina

Who are you?
May 6, 2010
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I've never been caught. In my case... I'd pull up my blankets and cover myself. Anyone who came in would think I was just sleeping or lying down, which I do quite often. Once they left though... I'd get back to what I was up to. :3
 

MrGalactus

Elite Member
Sep 18, 2010
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LobsterFeng said:
"Let's face it, this is not the worse thing you've caught me doing."
Name that movie.
Sherlock Holmes (the new one). (it's worst by the way)
 

TheKruzdawg

New member
Apr 28, 2010
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The library is not the best place for this kind of thing. What was I thinking masturbating there? And I guess I would stop. I'm sure it would ruin the moment
 

Tomo Stryker

New member
Aug 20, 2010
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El Poncho said:
Finish what I'm doing... Like a boss.
Look 'em in the eye and finish like a boss.

Ironically I have a funny story to accompany this post. I was wrapping up my "business" and my friend (female, never seen me do this before) walks in and sees me at my computer. I hear her come in the room while me headphones were on. I don't turn around and say, "Wow, this is awkward" without missing a beat (no pun intended). Ironically now she is my girlfriend.