You've just become emperor of the world. What's your first decree?

[holographicman]

and lo, the god emperor decreed:
"Every sunday shall be free ice cream day"

to get the people on my side before i turn everything into my mil/ind dictatorship

 

[holographicman]

outlaw religion. it's the cause of every damn war except the civil war, that was about state's rights. and the spanish american war had something to do with cuban independence, which didn't happen, did it communism? world war 1 wasn't related to religion and world war 2 was caused directly by world war 1, so that's out of the question (but hitler did kill a lot of jews, but that's not a war, that a genocide)

ok, maybe religion didn't cause that many wars, but it has cause billions fold of people to do dumb shit.

which brings me to my first decree as emperor: kill westboro baptist church

why not just outlaw stupidity?
i agree with the last part though

 

[The Stonker]

I would bring forth a new world order which was built upon humanism and everyone would work for the greater good.


And japanese robot stealth suits WEEEEE.

 

[peduncle]

make the worship of any religion illegal, and punishable by immediate death.

 

[sansamour14]

every week anyone having done a good deed shall receive a muffin of their choice anyone having done a good deed will be put to death. I can also declare when a deed is good or bad.

 

[RelexCryo]

My first decree is to tax every last damn religion out there. What about you?

Declare the world a republic with a direct referandum, like Switzerland. The position of Emperor of the world is pretty much an inherent violation of human rights.

Ignoring that however...I would legalize gay marriage, but also pass laws making it impossible for the state to force relgious persons to perform a marriage for homosexuals or any other individiuals that violate their religious codes. I would legalize marijuana (because it's your life, not mine, and you can spend it how you like) And I would allow law-abiding, sane adults to own and carry guns.

 

[Ham_authority95]

When I'm made Emperor, All Female Officers must wear....


Tiny Miniskirts!

*High fives* Agreed!

OT: Besides the above, I would:

-Make gay marriage legal,

-Make myself a badass cult to run the world after I'm gone

-Initiate economic reforms to jump-start new industries for the 21st century.

-Finally,I would leave the earth to explore the universe and have sex with alien prostitutes for the rest of my life.

 

[RelexCryo]

every week anyone having done a good deed shall receive a muffin of their choice anyone having done a good deed will be put to death. I can also declare when a deed is good or bad.

Do you mean anyone doing a bad deed shall be put to death? Because you have created a situation where I get a muffin and then death for being good...but nothing for being bad.

You: "Wow, did you just help open the door for the guy on crutches?"

Helpful guy: "Yes, I did."

You: "Here's a muffin!"

Helpful Guy: "Thanks!"

You: "And some buckshot!" *BANG*

Helpful guy: "No....why would you do that!?" *dies*

 

[Dark2003]

Hmmm, everyone pays me a dollar a month to live

 

[Dragonforce525]

Kinect will still be sold, but only as a trap, anyone caught buying it will be imprisoned for life.

 

[hawkeye52]

to abolish religion from the hearts and minds of everyone and also remove it from their memory and erase all physical evidence of it. there you go a good amount of problems solved right there

 

[Hokutan]

1) Destroy all religion Imo it's pointless
2) Destroy all children musicians (justin Bieber, Hannah Montana) ect
3) Expand across the galaxy and create the imperium

 

[Druyn]

A ring. Find/build me a magic ring, through which I could dominate everybody on the planet. I DONT CARE HOW YOU DO IT, JUST GET ME A MOOTHERFUCKING RING.

Failing that, I will close FOX news, forever. Nothing against conservatives, but that station is out there.

Now you can calculate the amount of taxes to levy on your pitiful subjects. Calculator ring!
OT: My first decree. Obey all other decrees or I
A)blow up the drugs you all are addicted to
B)Leave you to die on your pitiful continents with no trade
C)Wield the might of Emperor of the known universe of the world as a weapon to crush you.
D)Exile you to a prison planet.
And I can make as many decrees as I damn well please.
And the Spice Must FLOW!!!
Yeah, I've been reading Dune.
EDIT: Damn spice ninjas
E)All ninja's are to be slain if they do commit mandatory visibility on every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.

I find this acceptable! When I become emperor, you will be my royal finder-of-awesome-things-that-I-want.

 

[X123Lewis123X]

My loyal minions, you shall bow to your master, but first...

LET THERE BE CUPCAKES!!

 

[sumanoskae]

This world is now a dictatorship, before you all get yourselves and me killed

Also, millions in funds will now go to the creation of my video game.

Edit: Fox news is now closed, the top executives are expected to commit Japanese ritual suicide by this afternoon. Gaming, and all other forms of art, are now protected under the right to free speech, no censorship whatsoever. Fuck Michal Atkinson. BioWare, Disturbed, and anime/manga, are now official religions. All trading card games are now sports.

 

[Nalesnik]

Declare a work-free holiday to celebrate my recent emperor-ship, and hold a world-wide bonanza-fest with confetti and bands and beer and BBQ and parades and hot tubs, lots and lots of hot-tubs! Also mint chocolate chip ice cream for everybody!

 

[Torque669]

I'd fancy a KFC.

After all I had to go through to get Emperor a KFC should do me good.

That would be brilliant. Just taking control of the entire universe and you stand on your throne on every tv in existence and say "Your Emperor requires a KFC and no shitty little Fully Loaded box, I want a bucket".

Id probably find a good place to build my Palace as my first idea. As a decree I would make a Harry Tipper day where everyone must call all bald people "Spaceman".

 

[sansamour14]

every week anyone having done a good deed shall receive a muffin of their choice anyone having done a good deed will be put to death. I can also declare when a deed is good or bad.

Do you mean anyone doing a bad deed shall be put to death? Because you have created a situation where I get a muffin and then death for being good...but nothing for being bad.

You: "Wow, did you just help open the door for the guy on crutches?"

Helpful guy: "Yes, I did."

You: "Here's a muffin!"

Helpful Guy: "Thanks!"

You: "And some buckshot!" *BANG*

Helpful guy: "No....why would you do that!?" *dies*

lol i meant anyone having done a bad deed will be put to death

 

[open trap]

The destruction of pop music, disney channel, and Twilight related things.