25 Things a Perfect Guy Would Do
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I?ve tried number 24 and 25 a few times before but she always sprays that itchy spray in my face and the angry men with shiny coats come with their owie-sticks and hurt me and put me in the sad room with no windows.
I might try 21 and 22 next time.
I might try 21 and 22 next time.
I do all of those things, What? I'm a romantic. It's just what I do. But making a list is pretty stupid. Aside from the hair one. WTF?
GG?Guitar Gamer said:
Thank you.
That made me laugh hard enough to knock my wireless mouse off the table.
I'm afraid we do not have enough bullets.Kelthurin said:
We can start with them, but we'll have to move onto knives eventually.
Maybe you need to stay out of the sun for a bit.PurpleLemur said:
You know, get that stalker pale.
This is the kind of list you can tell was dreamt up by a pre-teen girl. I know because anyone's who actually passed through the hormonal nightmare of puberty will tell you a woman's priorities are slightly different. For instance, I'd be much happier with a man who can actually care a conversation rather than stare at me. The staring thing gets old fast, especially when the eyes tend to wander downwards. Of course, I'm also the type of gal who doesn't want a clingy, sappy, overly romantic guy for a boyfriend. I'm not alone in this. Most of my female friends tend to feel the same. The reason being we're not in high school anymore. Or even college.
One day the writer of this list will stumble into her mid-twenties and the real world. And suddenly she'll find herself completely willing to settle for a guy who can do more than grunt his way through a conversation, or one who understands your references however obscure you're being. "Perfect guy" goes out the window and instead you hunt for "Guy-whose-faults-don't-make-you-want-to-vomit." Of course, that's just me. I'm such a romantic.
EDIT:
One day the writer of this list will stumble into her mid-twenties and the real world. And suddenly she'll find herself completely willing to settle for a guy who can do more than grunt his way through a conversation, or one who understands your references however obscure you're being. "Perfect guy" goes out the window and instead you hunt for "Guy-whose-faults-don't-make-you-want-to-vomit." Of course, that's just me. I'm such a romantic.
EDIT:
That would be me. *raises hand*Asciotes said:
1. Know how to make you smile when you are down.
....on your knees? well.. "Let's put a smiiiiillllle on that face!"
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.
see, i've done this to women. they don't like it....especially if they don't know you....
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.
"Translation: bail you out when you fail at life, but never bring it up during conversations." i think says it best.
4. Give you the remote control during the game.
kay, the only way this makes sense to me is if tehy mean "gaming". cause i dont watch sports...YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU THE CONTROLLER DURING MA GAMING!? FUCK YOU *****!
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.
Ties in with #2-_-!
6. Play with your hair.
.....wtf is it with you and hair? Fetish? obsession? Do you collect hair samples from peoples combs? YES!? RUN AWAY! FAR AWAY!
7. His hands always find yours.
tell you what, you can shake hands with my little friend.
8. Be cute when he really wants something.
*makes pouty face*(O~O)Tweesome? PWEEEEASSSE?
9. Offer you plenty of massages.
this i can actually do. You dint mind that i specialize in breasts right?
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.
NO. Id rather have sex with your father......nvmnd....
11. Never run out of love.
Ima looooove factory baby, i neva run out.
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.
you have no idea....
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious.
Bare naked ladies said this one best "I'm the kinda guy who laughs at a funeral, don't understand what I mean but you soon will"
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.
Thats why we PSP.
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts.
But only if oyu promise to hit me reaaallly hard.
on the flip side, isnt this DOMESTIC ABUSE?
16. Smile a lot.
hes the only one who qualifys so far.
17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you.
the only way im doing this is if i get nice bj at teh end. of course youd do that for me anyways....RIGHT!?
18. Appreciate you.
I appreciate the sandwich you are going to make me.YOU.....not so much....
19. Help others out.
....of ma way? sure. its called a steel toed boot*kicks hobo* "MOVE!"
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.
so im guessing yo're not looking for an environmentalist.
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching.
yeah, sure, its do able. But why would you wanna make them jealous? You manipulative *****...im liking you more and more...
22. Sing, even if he can't.
you asked for it.
23. Have a creative sense of humor.
"honey, guess what?"
"what?"
"Thats not sugar you just put in your coffe!*whispers*it was anthrax..tee-heee"
24. Stare at you.
again, ties in to #2
25. Call for no reason.
#2
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it.
This I can't do since i don't do any of em. awww i failed....
after reviewing all teh questions, I can safely say there is only one man who could possibly do this and still keep his sanity.
"well heeellllloooo beautiful"
....on your knees? well.. "Let's put a smiiiiillllle on that face!"
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.
see, i've done this to women. they don't like it....especially if they don't know you....
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.
"Translation: bail you out when you fail at life, but never bring it up during conversations." i think says it best.
4. Give you the remote control during the game.
kay, the only way this makes sense to me is if tehy mean "gaming". cause i dont watch sports...YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU THE CONTROLLER DURING MA GAMING!? FUCK YOU *****!
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.
Ties in with #2-_-!
6. Play with your hair.
.....wtf is it with you and hair? Fetish? obsession? Do you collect hair samples from peoples combs? YES!? RUN AWAY! FAR AWAY!
7. His hands always find yours.
tell you what, you can shake hands with my little friend.
8. Be cute when he really wants something.
*makes pouty face*(O~O)Tweesome? PWEEEEASSSE?
9. Offer you plenty of massages.
this i can actually do. You dint mind that i specialize in breasts right?
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.
NO. Id rather have sex with your father......nvmnd....
11. Never run out of love.
Ima looooove factory baby, i neva run out.
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.
you have no idea....
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious.
Bare naked ladies said this one best "I'm the kinda guy who laughs at a funeral, don't understand what I mean but you soon will"
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.
Thats why we PSP.
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts.
16. Smile a lot.
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you.
the only way im doing this is if i get nice bj at teh end. of course youd do that for me anyways....RIGHT!?
18. Appreciate you.
I appreciate the sandwich you are going to make me.YOU.....not so much....
19. Help others out.
....of ma way? sure. its called a steel toed boot*kicks hobo* "MOVE!"
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.
so im guessing yo're not looking for an environmentalist.
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching.
yeah, sure, its do able. But why would you wanna make them jealous? You manipulative *****...im liking you more and more...
22. Sing, even if he can't.
you asked for it.
23. Have a creative sense of humor.
"honey, guess what?"
"what?"
"Thats not sugar you just put in your coffe!*whispers*it was anthrax..tee-heee"
24. Stare at you.
#2
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it.
This I can't do since i don't do any of em. awww i failed....
after reviewing all teh questions, I can safely say there is only one man who could possibly do this and still keep his sanity.
"well heeellllloooo beautiful"
i've noticed a lot of people are thinking number 2 is really weird...i love the smell of apple-y/fruity/awesomey hair 
Do internet girlfriends count? I doubt it, but she's the closest thing I've got, and if you ever visit my town, you'll understand my desperation.
...DON'T JUDGE ME!
(For this list assume that what we say to each other is truth)
...Don't judge me. Hey, best case scenario, I get a nice girlfriend. Bad case scenario; she's not as she described to me. I'd lecture her about lying on teh interwebzez, and let her off gently. Worst case scenario; Stalker or pedophile. I bring cellphone and weapon when I go to visit.
I don't see the danger in online stuff if you really do weigh out the scenarios, it's either truth, tough luck or minor danger, but I fear no man, woman or child.
...DON'T JUDGE ME!
...DON'T JUDGE ME!
(For this list assume that what we say to each other is truth)
I do that without trying. I'm that good.
...I don't like smelling people. This isn't in our e-cuddling curriculum.
E-wise, there's never been a real need to stick up for her. She can handle herself, I'm there when she's sad and such, but other than trying to teach her to solve her problems, I don't... can't... do much else.
Let's replace "game" with "something I like." She doesn't hate me for leaving the computer to watch T.V., I'm sure she'll live if we watch what I want to.
Hug from behind, sure, maybe. Sneak attack? For laughs, sure, for romantics, I'll be direct.
Again, not in our curriculum.
I don't know about "find", but it's her hands that always seem to get mine (e-actions).
Oh pshaw, I'm just adorable all the time. If I want something, she will get it for me, because I'm that good... what can she get me besides text again?
I don't know what this person's definition of "massage" is, but I can and would massage the hell out of her... (yes yes, we promised if it ever went IRL, we'd hold off until age, you know, morals and whatnot >_>)
Neither of us seem particularly bent on getting on the dance floor. And if she did, she knows I'm not going to.
I've loved my dog for about eight years now. I'm sure I can love a human for the rest of my life. I've got solar powered love generators or something.
Ah, something reasonable since 1? Check.
I usually handle a serious situation better comically. I'm a cheer-upperer, not a down-bringerer.
She's too sweet, she gets ready fast cause she wants to talk to me so much... Shut up, all of you.
I could, but she'd prefer it if I took her down for it, she likes it when I man-handle her... shut up...
I do that anyways. Reasonable enough, I suppose, as long as we don't go overboard.
...I'm not good with planning anything. Movie and maybe a dinner. A park walk or something, I don't know. Possible, but I'd normally do it, in the case.
'Course.
I do that anyways.
HAH! Alright, let's assume I'm driving age. From Truro, NS, to North Olmsted, OH; that's about a 5 hour drive, if not more. I'm staying for a week if I'm makin' that trip.
Just to rub their noses in it, I so would. Hell, I'd dip kiss 'er.
As Wanderfreak said; Just try and stop me.
Check?
...Creepy. Let's nuzzle, or something, I don't care, but stare? ...Creepy.
That happened to me once. I had nothing to say. I don't do that. I IM for no reason.
Fixed the "u". Chewing? Like chewing tobacco? Because I need to chew my food. I don't, and definitely don't plan to do any of that crap. If she asked me to stop doing something that was bad, I'd probably stop doing it.
...Don't judge me. Hey, best case scenario, I get a nice girlfriend. Bad case scenario; she's not as she described to me. I'd lecture her about lying on teh interwebzez, and let her off gently. Worst case scenario; Stalker or pedophile. I bring cellphone and weapon when I go to visit.
I don't see the danger in online stuff if you really do weigh out the scenarios, it's either truth, tough luck or minor danger, but I fear no man, woman or child.
...DON'T JUDGE ME!
I freaking love you!WanderFreak said:
On Topic:
Yeah, good luck. I would assume that most girls are not after clingy stalkers... I could be wrong... Hold on, I'll stalk my neighbour for a couple of weeks and get back to you with her reaction.
EDIT:
You also have a measure of my love.high_castle said:
1. Know how to make you smile when you are down.
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.
4. Give you the remote control during the game.
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.
6. Play with your hair.
7. His hands always find yours.
8. Be cute when he really wants something.
9. Offer you plenty of massages.
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.
11. Never run out of love.
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious.
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts.
16. Smile a lot.
17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you.
18. Appreciate you.
19. Help others out.
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching.
22. Sing, even if he can't.
23. Have a creative sense of humor.
24. Stare at you.
25. Call for no reason.
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it.
25 tips on how to get friend zoned XD.
But yeah it's a pretty nice list. /saved. teehee
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.
4. Give you the remote control during the game.
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.
6. Play with your hair.
7. His hands always find yours.
8. Be cute when he really wants something.
9. Offer you plenty of massages.
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.
11. Never run out of love.
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious.
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts.
16. Smile a lot.
17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you.
18. Appreciate you.
19. Help others out.
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching.
22. Sing, even if he can't.
23. Have a creative sense of humor.
24. Stare at you.
25. Call for no reason.
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it.
25 tips on how to get friend zoned XD.
But yeah it's a pretty nice list. /saved. teehee
O...kay? These are kinda creepy in a stalker-ish way.
What about him?
I hate dancing. Singing too. Can you tell that I hate musicals?
It only takes me about an hour to get ready, purely because it takes a freakishly long time for my hair to dry. other than that it takes me about 15-20 minutes to get ready. And even then I get impatient when I have to wait.
Why the hell should he? If he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. Just because he's dating you doesn't mean he's sudenly a saint.
Kinda unreasonable don't you think.
EDIT: I would also like for a boyfriend to actualy have a pair, and to be able to stand with the addition of a spine.
That list makes the author out to be a complete attention whore.
And I thought the perfect guy was Edward Cullen?
And I thought the perfect guy was Edward Cullen?
WTF? What group of idiots wrote in stupid, insipid list? And what the hell is Line 15 all about?!! Since when is abuse a form of endearment. This list fills me with a deep disgust. The woman who would want her man to follow this list and the man who follows it, really should not breed, or hopefully exist.