Dragon Ball Evolution review

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sharpshooter188

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I saw this coming a mile away. I was a hardcore DBZ fan for a while but.. lol when i heard they were going to make a movie i just said to myself "oh no...."
I expected them to play some plot twists to make it into a movie but I didnt think itd be on the level of house of the dead.

Sounds like it though.
 

Kais86

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May 21, 2008
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Ah, a fine example of weapons grade movie if I ever saw one, this movie is something you buy on dvd to inflict it upon your friends...and enemies if it comes to that....
 

Chibz

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Kais86 said:
Ah, a fine example of weapons grade movie if I ever saw one, this movie is something you buy on dvd to inflict it upon your friends...and enemies if it comes to that....
Are you supporting using this film as a form of torture?

Oh, you sick sick man. :)
 

Kais86

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Chibz said:
Kais86 said:
Ah, a fine example of weapons grade movie if I ever saw one, this movie is something you buy on dvd to inflict it upon your friends...and enemies if it comes to that....
Are you supporting using this film as a form of torture?

Oh, you sick sick man. :)
The reason why mankind survives scifi(genre) movies: anything and everything, be it bolted down or not, is a weapon and we will use it, I like to think I follow this model in real life.
 

Chibz

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With this movie officially released (I guess), and rumours of a cowboy bebop film on its way it only leaves us to wonder: What will Fox try to defile next?

If they plan on Ranma, so help me...
 

Abedeus

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Wait. Why Roshi doesn't have his staff, why he isn't bald and why he doesn't have a huge beard? Why Son Goku sees things in the Dragon Balls? What prophecy?! Why Piccolo could use Force Grip?!

Why Son Goku is the same age as Bulma and Chichi? Why Piccolo has a giant space ship? Why, if this is the Dragon Ball universe, there is no Capsule Corp? And why did you choose Mister Earry to be the main villain? And why he isn't green?! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WHY?!


My childhood has been raped. *goes to read DB manga alone and in great pain*
 

Izakflashman

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Dec 18, 2008
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Soooo, what if we found someone who had no idea what dragon ball z was and made them watch the movie? Is it something non fanchildren could watch and enjoy? Or is there no redeemable feature? Theres no awesome soundtrack? No sweet cinematography? Just bad pronunciations and inaccurate story lines? Sorry, this isn't mean't to come out as negative as it probably sounds, I'm just hoping you have a completely justified reason for giving it a 0/10. I haven't seen it, and if I do bother seeing it, chances are I'll PM you saying I wish I listened. =)
 

Abedeus

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GloatingSwine said:
I kid you fucking not, he literally sits there and daydreams about Chichi eating fruit. Later he helps her open her locker using what they call "Kai". Now in the original series "Kai" was the energy that the characters used to hurl balls of energy around, but in this bastardization not only do they mispronounce it as "Key" the entire time, but its been relegated to ripped off force powers.
Actually, "key" is the correct pronunciation of Ki. "i" in Japanese is always pronounced with the "ee" sound.

Other than that, the movie is apocalyptically bad.
Ayup.

Ki is read just like in Polish or Spanish grammar. Japanese is actually a crossover between Slavic grammar and English sh, ch and few other. That's why we have easy time saying "Hayabusa" - we just read it just like we would in our own language.


Oh, the last time I watched anime/read the manga, I THOUGHT KAMEHAMEHA DIDN'T BURN THINGS! It's a raw power, pure force. You can't light something on fire if you hit it with something unable to ignite.


Few scenes later: IT ALSO CAN'T FREAKIN' REVIVE PEOPLE!
 

Chibz

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Izakflashman said:
Soooo, what if we found someone who had no idea what dragon ball z was and made them watch the movie? Is it something non fanchildren could watch and enjoy? Or is there no redeemable feature? Theres no awesome soundtrack? No sweet cinematography? Just bad pronunciations and inaccurate story lines? Sorry, this isn't mean't to come out as negative as it probably sounds, I'm just hoping you have a completely justified reason for giving it a 0/10. I haven't seen it, and if I do bother seeing it, chances are I'll PM you saying I wish I listened. =)
Well, who do you suppose is going to be the primary audience for a movie based on Dragon Ball? It doesn't matter what nonfans think. It's what the FANBASE thinks of the film.

And, as a fan, I'm pretty pissed.
 

hooooooooplaaaa

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Mar 11, 2009
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no surprise the movie blows chunks pretty much ever live action movie that started life as the decent game suck so hard it can suck the spots off a cow
 

oliveira8

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Flying-Emu said:
oliveira8 said:
Sad...And not having Master Roshi not being a old pervert that lives in a island in the middle of the ocean is like having Lord of the Rings trilogy without the ring.
Or Tom Bombadil.

OH SHI-
Dude...Tom Bombadil has ZERO! importance to the story. Like Peter Jackson proved you can remove half of the Book 1 narrative and nothing is changed. And thank god he did, also another reason he stayed out besides doing nothing, is cause Tom is immune to the power of the Ring, and the first part of the movie is explaining how the ring corrupts the person who has it, this would be to confussing for the viewers.If Tom didnt get his own poem book he would be just the dude that saved the hobbits from a nasty tree and those things which name I forgot. Not to mention that the character itself and his lines are so outdated it makes me embarassed to read his chapters.

Also in Book 1 you can skip every from shortcuts to mushrooms to when the hobbits reach Bree. Cause in betewen theres nothing important.
 

GloatingSwine

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oliveira8 said:
Dude...Tom Bombadil has ZERO! importance to the story.
Even Tolkien admitted that Bombadil doesn't fit in the story, he was just the kind of old english embodied spirit of nature that he'd been working on at the time, and rather liked.

Also in Book 1 you can skip every from shortcuts to mushrooms to when the hobbits reach Bree. Cause in betewen theres nothing important.
Except for finding the swords in the barrows. Which is very important.
 

Avida

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Oct 17, 2008
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Ok, im convinced, i need to go watch it and bring as many people as possible :p
 

Piecewise

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Izakflashman said:
Soooo, what if we found someone who had no idea what dragon ball z was and made them watch the movie? Is it something non fanchildren could watch and enjoy? Or is there no redeemable feature? Theres no awesome soundtrack? No sweet cinematography? Just bad pronunciations and inaccurate story lines? Sorry, this isn't mean't to come out as negative as it probably sounds, I'm just hoping you have a completely justified reason for giving it a 0/10. I haven't seen it, and if I do bother seeing it, chances are I'll PM you saying I wish I listened. =)
If I wasn't a fan of the material I would probably give it a 2 or 3. If we judge it based on its own merits rather then its portrayal of the subject matter then its still just an incredibly cliche action flick. It rips off scenes and ideas from all sorts of things (AIR BENDING WTF)and its acting/ setting is schizophrenic, going from twilight to kungfu to emo to god knows what. It would basically be like seeing the street fighter movie without knowing anything about street fighter.
 

scotth266

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Jan 10, 2009
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Onmi said:
And it's being done by Spielburg, Lord of "Take a Sci-Fi setting use only the BAREST of resemblence to the plot, themes, or characters. And then insert your own stuff"

IF ANYBODY TOUCHES BIG O THEY DIE ON SPOT!
Agreed. Defiling the O will result in several KO's induced through gunshot wounds. Mostly. Chainsaws would be acceptable. If they were also on fire. For MAXIMUM pain.

GOOD LORD I SEE THE GHOST OF LUCAS! HE HAS COME TO REMAKE OUR ANIME!!!

Prepare for more child-molesting than ever!
 

Piecewise

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Apr 18, 2008
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I still find it terrifying that and Avatar the last airbender live action movie is being made by M.Night Shamalamadingdong. I liked Avatar, it was original but still had a classic storybook feel to it. And they got a guy who made a movie about trees trying to kill us to make it?

mother fucker
 

Izakflashman

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Dec 18, 2008
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Piecewise said:
Izakflashman said:
Soooo, what if we found someone who had no idea what dragon ball z was and made them watch the movie? Is it something non fanchildren could watch and enjoy? Or is there no redeemable feature? Theres no awesome soundtrack? No sweet cinematography? Just bad pronunciations and inaccurate story lines? Sorry, this isn't mean't to come out as negative as it probably sounds, I'm just hoping you have a completely justified reason for giving it a 0/10. I haven't seen it, and if I do bother seeing it, chances are I'll PM you saying I wish I listened. =)
If I wasn't a fan of the material I would probably give it a 2 or 3. If we judge it based on its own merits rather then its portrayal of the subject matter then its still just an incredibly cliche action flick. It rips off scenes and ideas from all sorts of things (AIR BENDING WTF)and its acting/ setting is schizophrenic, going from twilight to kungfu to emo to god knows what. It would basically be like seeing the street fighter movie without knowing anything about street fighter.
Ah sweet, thats what I needed to hear.