Dragon Ball Evolution review

[BLOONINJA 503]

Hm...The only reason I'm glad that it's bad is so that I could make a good one some day.

Anyway, I always had hopes for this movie when I heard about it back in seventh grade(2002). But seeing a trailer back in December made me resent liking DB and DBZ. Just seeing how everything I love is bastardized...I...I, can't think of what to say.

I'm still gonna see it one way or another. Just so then I can complain about it.

with an economy like this, good luck with your dream of ANYONE funding a movie after this one... FOX just killed off any hope of a good dbz live action film :[

 

[GloatingSwine]

FOX just killed off any hope of a good dbz live action film :[

See, you're not understanding. There was never any hope of a good Dragonball film, the stories aren't designed to be told in the timeframe or manner of a two hour movie. Fox just proved why it was a bad idea in the first place.

 

[Hunde Des Krieg]

You went into this movie all wrong: You thought that it was serious.

For shame!

This movie was made as a standard setter. You see, most movies are made to try and raise the bar, while this was actually made in order to let other movies know just how low it goes.

I wish Mystery Science Theatre 3k would assassinate this movie, though sadly, it won't happen.

Which is why we, as nerds, should build a new mystery science theater. But it will now be 4k, and populate it with the wittiest robots in the galaxy.

 

[GloatingSwine]

Just hope Doug Walker (That Guy With The Glasses) picks up on it. That's all the evisceration a movie needs.

 

[kokirisoldier]

.....It's like any train wreck or car accident...you have to see it and you cant look away.

yeah I've followed DB and DBZ for a few good years, have some of the movies, and figures still.

I'm probably going to get trashed and watch it....maybe that will make it better????

EDIT: It was made by Fox???...Well there's your first problem.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

I kid you fucking not, he literally sits there and daydreams about Chichi eating fruit. Later he helps her open her locker using what they call "Kai". Now in the original series "Kai" was the energy that the characters used to hurl balls of energy around, but in this bastardization not only do they mispronounce it as "Key" the entire time, but its been relegated to ripped off force powers.

Actually, "key" is the correct pronunciation of Ki. "i" in Japanese is always pronounced with the "ee" sound.

Other than that, the movie is apocalyptically bad.

I was about to point this out. Thanks for clearing it up for him.

As for the movie, I can't say I'm surprised. It's disturbing how much they seemed to fuck it up.

 

[BLOONINJA 503]

FOX just killed off any hope of a good dbz live action film :[

See, you're not understanding. There was never any hope of a good Dragonball film, the stories aren't designed to be told in the timeframe or manner of a two hour movie. Fox just proved why it was a bad idea in the first place.

when was hope considered understandable??? :]

I knew the flaws with it, just my inner child longing for SOMETHING.

 

[goodman528]

When I first saw the poster for this movie, I thought it was a prank. It turns out I wasn't so far from the truth.

 

[Chibz]

What did you expect It was a movie by Fox, that was made off of a comic about a wild boy whom turned into a giant ape, ate gratuitous amounts of food, lived with a well endowed 15 years old girl, had a friend with no nose, met a seemingly stereotype Australian gentleman in the middle of a desert whom had a talking cat, and it all ended with the killing of a green man.
How could Fox NOT turn that into a high school bad kung-fu movie that has nothing to do with the source material?

Because you seem to have the flimsiest grasp possible on the source material? It was actually quite amusing.

 

[Daezd]

Bahahahahaha!

Man, I am so going to go see this when I get the chance. Seriously, did anyone, anyone think this would be a good movie?

I am really excited now, thanks!

 

[runedeadthA]

The Plan:
Step 1- Invite all enemies to see DBZ:movie
Step 2- Make sure they are in the theater when in starts.
Step 3- Lock the doors and listen to the sounds of heads exploding ( or melting, its unknowable, like shroedingers cat ;p )


... Is it just me or do I feel a parody of Monty pythons "Funniest joke" sketch coming on....but in reverse

 

[Sparrow]

Fuck me. To think, the program this was BASED of actually pulled off the stunts better than this piece of crap.

If this makes more than 10mil, the world is offically full of nutjobs.

 

[Chibz]

The Plan:
Step 1- Invite all enemies to see DBZ:movie
Step 2- Make sure they are in the theater when in starts.
Step 3- Lock the doors and listen to the sounds of heads exploding ( or melting, its unknowable, like shroedingers cat ;p )


... Is it just me or do I feel a parody of Monty pythons "Funniest joke" sketch coming on....but in reverse

It's clearly based on Dragon Ball (the original series, Piccolo saga) and NOT DBZ (Which is basically just half-naked men screaming like they're constipated). Gawd.

 

[elricik]

Nobody go see this, even if you just want to make fun of it and laugh at it, cause then you will have to give them money. Lets just pretend it never happened and get on with our lives like we should. If you must see it *cough* pirate *cough* bay *cough*.

 

[Chibz]

Nobody go see this, even if you just want to make fun of it and laugh at it, cause then you will have to give them money. Lets just pretend it never happened and get on with our lives like we should. If you must see it *cough* pirate *cough* bay *cough*.

I was going to pirate it (ARRRR!), buy some snacks and watch it with a friend while acting as if at a funeral.

RIP chances of a good live action Dragon Ball film, you will be missed.

 

[MrBrightside919]

Was this review even necissary? I mean, who actually thought this movie was going to be the least bit good?

 

[Chibz]

Was this review even necissary? I mean, who actually thought this movie was going to be the least bit good?

Well, the movie (before they started/etc) had POTENTIAL to be good. The source materials is exceptionally entertaining.

 

[Abedeus]

Was this review even necissary? I mean, who actually thought this movie was going to be the least bit good?

Well, the movie (before they started/etc) had POTENTIAL to be good. The source materials is exceptionally entertaining.

Yeah. My friend, before the movie was aired in Asia, thought it's a good movie.

Dunno what will he say when it comes to Europe.

Nobody go see this, even if you just want to make fun of it and laugh at it, cause then you will have to give them money. Lets just pretend it never happened and get on with our lives like we should. If you must see it *cough* pirate *cough* bay *cough*.

I was going to pirate it (ARRRR!), buy some snacks and watch it with a friend while acting as if at a funeral.

Don't. Waste of bandwidth.

 

[Chibz]

Was this review even necissary? I mean, who actually thought this movie was going to be the least bit good?

Well, the movie (before they started/etc) had POTENTIAL to be good. The source materials is exceptionally entertaining.

Yeah. My friend, before the movie was aired in Asia, thought it's a good movie.

Dunno what will he say when it comes to Europe.

Nobody go see this, even if you just want to make fun of it and laugh at it, cause then you will have to give them money. Lets just pretend it never happened and get on with our lives like we should. If you must see it *cough* pirate *cough* bay *cough*.

I was going to pirate it (ARRRR!), buy some snacks and watch it with a friend while acting as if at a funeral.

Don't. Waste of bandwidth.

Sadly, at this point, I'm morbidly curious as to HOW bad it really is. And the only way I can know is by watching.