*Facepalm* I cant believe i know you

[santacolia]

I'd like to make two examples, one like the OP wants... I know guy A and guy B. I can't believe i know guy A who actually said, "i can't believe guy B is dating my ex.(of over a year broken up and 9 months out of communication). He should have asked me first."

I shit you not.

Eh I'm with guy A, its part of the bro code, if hes your friend you ask.

...Are you kidding me? You think you have some kind of right to your ex? That you have some kind of say whether or not a guy can date her? News flash. You don't own her. You don't have any stock in her life, let alone any amount of controlling stock.

Most of what i've heard about the "bro code" seems like childish rubbish invented by teens to satiate their puberty driven jealousy created by their scorned attempts at relationships based on sexual urges.

Learn to control your dicks gentlemen, and you'll learn to control your dick-headedness.

No its polite to ask a friend if you plan on dating an ex, hell they have no right to her but still its like a slap in the face, sure you can date her if you want but expect the friend to get pissed, you should at least tell him before hand. And I think you should read the book before judging it, because I would say its has some good guidelines you can use.

If I was his ex, I'd be extremely pissed to hear that. Come on, he has no right to make my current boyfriend feel awkward because he can't let go. After a year, its way over. Get on with your life. If he was married it might be different, but even then they can't control what happens. What if he said "no you can't?" which seems likely? Does she never get to date someone she cares about because her ex doesn't approve? They should let the guy know if they plan on ever talking to him again, but otherwise how dare he think people have to ask his permission to date his ex? Do all three of my ex's have to be called every time I go out?
Sounds like this guy is just not over her yet. Either that or he is a power trip. Does he make you ask permission to eat the same kind of food he likes too? Or wear similar clothes?

 

[GreyWolf257]

I have a friend acquaintance who once shouted "Dildos!" in the middle of a mall while we were on a school-sponsored trip. It would not be an exaggeration to say that everyone in the mall stopped and stared at us.

 

[santacolia]

One of my friends has a problem with remembering word meanings. She is actually pretty smart in other areas, like math, but she just can never get the right word out making her funny to be around. Took us two years to drill it into her that the word was "ironic" not "erotic."
"no, jumbo-shrimp is not erotic" (well, maybe to some people)

 

[MasterSpaceman]

You people are overthinking so much of this.

@ The dating the Ex situation.

That WHOLE situation pretty much comes down to circumstances. If I'm with a girl for a year.. Then I dump her and don't talk to her for 6 months. Then my friend starts dating her.
Sure I'm gonna be a little miffed at first.. I have all these memories with her about how much I loved her.. and he was there as a mate the whole time. Then he stabs me in the back like that..
But eventually, pretty soon, I'd get over it because when push comes to shove.. I dumped her.

However if the breakup was caused by her or it was a pretty messy breakup.. I'd be pissed off. Also, if it was a messy breakup like a month ago.. I'd be seriously betrayed.
It's respectful to ask, or just not go there. If you're a good friend, you wouldn't try. You'd ignore your feelings and move on.
Odds are, there's always someone out there better for you than the one you marry. You're not losing much.
On the other hand, if my friend saw how badly she messed me up and went with her anyways? Part of me wouldn't mind.. because he's clearly a glutton for punishment. The same will happen to him.
---

@ derelict

I don't believe the OP meant "I can't believe I know you" to be like that.
I don't personally believe it means that smart people should only be surrounded by smart people.
Personally, I see that statement as more of a "Wow, really?" kinda thing.
I'm pretty smart, most of my friends are too, yet we can all do incredibly stupid things or have our moments where we're dumb as doorknobs. When one of us says or does something incredibly stupid.. You can't help but laugh and think "Wow, really? I can't believe you just said that."

 

[Actual]

"isnt chocholate a nut?" (talking about allergies)
Luckily i dont count this person as a friend but i can assure you everyone in earshot facepalmed.

Well it's made from a bean or seed, I'm not sure which, but some alternatives are made from the carob nut. So I can see why they'd be confused.

I'd like to make two examples, one like the OP wants... I know guy A and guy B. I can't believe i know guy A who actually said, "i can't believe guy B is dating my ex.(of over a year broken up and 9 months out of communication). He should have asked me first."

I shit you not.

Eh I'm with guy A, its part of the bro code, if hes your friend you ask.

...Are you kidding me? You think you have some kind of right to your ex? That you have some kind of say whether or not a guy can date her? News flash. You don't own her.

Nothing you've said is wrong, however if he's really the guys friend,as in he cares about him, then he should have asked. I broke up with a girl four years ago, and still aren't over her, I broke up with a girl six months ago and was over her instantly, you can never know how this will affect someone. Best to ask.

 

[wootsniper]

Friend:"No, no, all the colors of light mixed together make black! Just look what happens when you mix paint!"
Me:*Sigh*

I was almost going to ask why that was funny,
until i saw the word "light". XD

 

[Actual]

i recently discovered that one of my friends is into BDSM o.o

That's...bondage right?

unfortunately... yes. (BDSM by itself is already pretty sick, but my friend is 17 just like me, which makes it even sicker)

BDSM is not just bondage, it's bondage, sadism, and masochism. That means using restraints and pain infliction/receiving.

Everyone enjoys a little light BDSM, some people just enjoy the harder stuff. No worries as long as they don't surprise you with this in the middle of coitus, as has happened to me.

 

[Hazy]

At an orientation, we were being briefed by a woman named Ms. Glasscock.

For those of you not in the know (I'm referring to all three of you,)
Teenagers + Penis jokes = Laughter for about 25 minutes straight.

I just facepalmed while they had their fun.

 

[wootsniper]

What exactly is the funny part?

the fact that America's health-care sucks?
or the fact that a 100 people is actually nothing?

 

[Christemo]

Oh and one time my friend said "The Game" And then i punched him so hard his grand children would feel it..

i dont know how fuck that makes any kinda sense, but that was hilarious, sir.

 

[MasterSpaceman]

Oh and one time my friend said "The Game" And then i punched him so hard his grand children would feel it..

i dont know how fuck that makes any kinda sense, but that was hilarious, sir.

The Game.
You're constantly playing The Game.
You cannot win the game, you can only lose. You lose whenever you think about The Game. Also, once you think about the game.. You have to announce it. "I lost The Game"


A friend of mine always does that. Changing his facebook status to "I LOST THE GAME!"
To purposely make everyone else lose.

 

[Actual]

Oh and one time my friend said "The Game" And then i punched him so hard his grand children would feel it..

i dont know how fuck that makes any kinda sense, but that was hilarious, sir.

The game wiki explanation [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Game_%28mind_game%29]

Spoiler: I'm sorry but...

I believe it started as an internet meme, it's gotten so big that now the only suitable response is horrific violence.

 

[joshthor]

Oh and one time my friend said "The Game" And then i punched him so hard his grand children would feel it..

i dont know how fuck that makes any kinda sense, but that was hilarious, sir.

the game is a crappy cw show. or was. hence the punching.

 

[brucelee13245]

My friend was sitting on the floor playing video games then suddennly looked up at me, "is kentucky in alabama?" I said no , kentucky is a state. He sat there and thought for a second then looked up at me and goes, "oh, well is alabama in kentucky?" I said um, no alabama is a state. then he says, "REALLY?!?!. .... O_O i didint know what to say after that.

 

[wizzerd229]

i recently discovered that one of my friends is into BDSM o.o

and...

 

[Arkhangelsk]

He doesn't know what Doom, Wolfenstein, Final Fantasy, Battlefield, Call of Duty, Metroid, etc. is, and he says that Halo 3 is the best game ever, despite having barely played it.

 

[TriggerHappyAngel]

i recently discovered that one of my friends is into BDSM o.o

and...

- that was my answer to the question. -_-''

 

[GHMonkey]

got into a religious discussion with one of my friends, my being loose christian him being over the top anti-theist (his words not mine). told me i gay when i made valid arguments.

one of my other friends never saw The Godfather.

usually i don't really care or make a big deal out of it.

 

[smithy1234]

Alright this is an amazing story, prepare to laugh and fall on the floor. I swear this is a true story.

So my friends and I were eating at a restaurant before going to a house party. Some girls I knew walked in and saw us, they said they were going to the party too but didn't have a lift. I offered to drive them and they accepted, only problem was, there was not a lot of space in the car. So we were trying to figure out ways they could fit in the car. Then my friend who hasn't said a word this whole time, looks at the girls and says this:

"Maybe we could take off all your clothes and we'll fit you in the trunk" in a dead serious tone.

This was the most painful, awkward silence I ever had to endure. The facepalm was so epic and well deserved. The girls just looked disgusted and had to look away as we thought "Did he honestly just fucking say that???". Long story short, they came anyways and we squished them in the backseat while we made the friend who said that amazingly awful quote sit in the front seat away from the girls.

 

[Goldeneye103X2]

My friend laughed for half an hour when my sports teacher said "We have to steal each others balls"

I laughed out loud, am i immature now?

I laughed too, so don't worry, your'e not alone.

Yeah, I laughed too. Is he really that unconscious of his own mouth as to say that?