"get back in the kitchen"

[Rolling Thunder]

Don't worry about what is or isn't "normal". Just do what you want. If that means cooking, cleaning and being a housewife, great. If it means running a corporation or climbing Mt. Everest, great too. The whole point of the feminist movement was to give women the CHOICE to be who they wanted to be, not to say "all women must behave like X". Just chill out, relax and do what pleases you in life, and be happy that a previous generation of women fought for your ability to make those choices.

Finally, someone who actually understands feminism. Dear God-Emperor, I was tired of every buffoon howling on about how feminists hated men, and how they hated chivalry and so on. Every feminist I've met has commented on my chivalry in glowing terms, as well as my manners, size, strength and learning. The misandrists I've met have despised me for it, but the difference between a feminist and a misandrist is the same as that between the church of England and the Westborough Bapists Church. Or a Catholic and the IRA.

 

[pdgeorge]

...and I guess a lot of guys feel that emasculates them somehow that they arent the sole provider anymore...

I'm sorry, in my personal oppinion, I honestly don't give a rats ass about if a girl wants to work or be a stay at home mum but your justification as to why some men insult women is worse then "get back to the kitchen" "make me a sandwich" and all those other low grade sexist comments (theres alot worse, those are at the lower end of the spectrum)

This is a personal peeve I have with alot of women who claim 'oh they are feeling emasculated because we are no longer stay at home mums!' because it is pure BS and little more then women trying to feel better about being insulted. It just reminds me of the protective mum that hugs her kid and says "they only insult you because they are jealous". While that may be true sometimes, most of the time it's just some crap being said to try and feel better about being insulted without thinking of the REAL reason.

Men insult eachother all the time. Yes EACHOTHER. A man insulting a woman will generally be an initiation thing, like a man would do to the new bloke in the workplace. At the point she is insulted she then needs to decide if she is going to 'remain in the kitchen', away from the big boys, stay steadfast that she is a woman in the workplace they have no right to insult her or stand up and prove she has balls enough to be welcomed into the group. This doesn't mean turning around and being insulting in return (IE: claiming that they are feeling emasculated by your mere precense! the fact that you dared to venture out of the kitchen and towards where they work is obviously proof enough they are no longer MEN) but instead rolling with the punches and prove you can take an insult and maybe even give a good one in return just like any of the other guys would(that isn't a generic cop out you hear yelled out all the time like "BET YOU HAVE A SMALL PENIS!", it generally needs to be something atleast PARTLY original and funny). I don't want the impression to come across from this that "girls need to be more like men" but more "if people of differing colour/gender/anything want to work together they have to understand they are not different from eachother and they should all give and recieve the same treatment

The majority of times when I see men turning to women in work places and looking down at them is generally when the woman purposfully sets herself apart from the men she claims are sexist pigs. Infact, they recieve the same treatment as the gay fellows who claim the guys are homophobes and the wierd guy who follows cricket while everyone else follows football. Within the main group, there are some girls, there are some gay guys and there are some cricket supporters but they are welcomed in the group and concidered one of the family because the ones in the group arn't setting themselves apart for their differences but setting them aside and joining in with the others for what they all enjoy the same.

 

[Uilleand]

I make more money in our relationship...not by a lot, but enough...
Which is fine, cuz my husband will make a better parent than I ever could...So, for him to stay home with the kiddies will be perfect!

 

[vampirekid.13]

I really hate that sort of thing. Not because I am a feminist but because it makes it very hard for me to justify the fact that I think a man should take care of a woman. I think the traditional family structure thing is really cool. A woman who takes care of the children and the homestead

but it has been twisted and contorted more by men than women it seems. Some girls want to work and have professional careers and thats cool, maybe ill do that too, and I guess a lot of guys feel that emasculates them somehow that they arent the sole provider anymore.

sometimes I feel whatever you choose you will be looked down on by some group. Women who are all about female empowerment will think you are holding back progress if you choose to raise your children and men will repeat their tired lines about sandwich making if you want to be a career woman.

that and if a guy wants to do something for me, I will let them. I could prolly lift that heavy object, but if a guy gets something out of the act of helping a girl I think thats great. It doesnt make me weak or dependant but there are people who will make it out to be like that.

i feel like its harder than ever to just be 'normal' maybe i dont want to be super progressive about some things, is that so bad?

i personally wouldnt take the kitchen/sandwich making lines serious, they're always fun to say to friends that dont take them the wrong way, but i dont think anyone actually means it.


also its your life, you can do whatever you want, and being traditional is one of the options.

 

[Halfbreed13]

What? Sexism is bad?
We didn't know >.>

 

[AkJay]

But it's proven that when a woman becomes the provider for a man and his family, she becomes less attracted to him for not being more masculine, so she cheats on him, or just leaves them, so that's why men don't want women to be powerful, because you won't need us anymore, so it's equally a man and a woman's fault.

 

[esperandote]

when a have a wife she better works but in case she makes more money than me ill be both proud and a little ashamed. and i will help her in with the house keeping but not because a like doing it but becuase it will be whats fair.

 

[Guitarmasterx7]

Eh, normal girls are boring anyways. Though a sammich every now and then is always nice...

 

[Joshimodo]

Well, my mom worked and so did my dad, and now I have both an Xbox 360 and a PS3... so the kids win..

This guy ended the thread before it started, really.

Work more folks, and get your kids the best of both worlds.

How do you figure? My mum is a single parent and I have both a 360 and PS3.




If I held a door open for a girlfriend and she went off on one about chauvinism or something akin to that, I'd laugh and slam the door in their face. It's called courtesy. I'd do it for anyone I liked or respected.

Same with lifting things. If I offer to lift/move something for a woman, I don't expect a backlash and a lecture, as it was an offer not limited to a gender or anything, and I wasn't going "STAND BACK FEEBLE WOMAN, THIS IS A MAN'S JOB, AND I AM A MAN. SUPERIORITYYYYY!"


The whole "get back in the kitchen" thing is old hat, and shouldn't be used in this day and age.

Equality FTW, feminism FTL.

 

[Conveant0]

If I held a door open for a girlfriend and she went off on one about chauvinism or something akin to that, I'd laugh and slam the door in their face. It's called courtesy. I'd do it for anyone I liked or respected.

Agreed, the amount of times I hold open doors in shops or let someone get in the queue at the bus stop, to only have them or others to exhibit a confused or even angry expression, is staggering. Honestly I'd of recieved less hassle by shutting the doors into said persons or just not letting that old woman into the queue, than have to face the result of them or those around them starting an arguement over how I "Shouldn't get involved with other people"...
It's staggering the amount of people who are that insecure about such an insignificant event, when you are only being decent and polite. If you want gender stats, then it's about 50|50 M|F, so both sexes show how little they trust in the intentions of other people.

Story cut short, people are incourtious bastards, despite gender, and is more of a result of societies misgivings than equality.

 

[salbarragan]

The feminist movement was about choice. If you wanted to work that was your call. If you wanted to stay at home, that was fine too. So in reality, as a woman, you can decide which one of these options you would like to do thanks the women who came before you fought valiantly so that you could make that choice on your own. No matter which one you choose, you're right.

Now in regards to a guy who feels emasculated because their significant other makes more than they do, tell them to grow up. In today's society, more women are going to college and they are earning more degrees than men. We are currently on the cusp of a paradigm shift on the image of gender roles in America. No longer will women be expected to stay at home and raise kids, while dad works. Sometimes, that will be reversed. If that day ever came for me, I would have no problem being a stay at home dad because its not about who is supporting who, it's about what are we doing as a team to move us along further.

I know my view is not going to be popular amongst guys. That is only because we've always been socialized to think that as a man, I must be the provider. What is funny, is that our perception of reality is skewed. In a hunter/gather society, most of the food is gathered by the women. Men only hunted a small fraction of the diet. In an agricultural society, women are expected to work in the fields just as much as men. The type of work (manual vs detailed) might be different, but at the end of the day, it's still work. So my question is, where does this ultra-machismo come from? Hell, I'm Mexican and I have to hear that stuff from my family all the time, even though most of the families that I know have the mom and the dad working in order to support the family but the dad is still seen as the bread winner!

So my challenge to you is this. Think about what you want from a relationship. Ask yourself if would you be happy being at home. Then make the decision that best suits you. Whichever one you choose, will be the right answer. Than tell anyone else who doesn't agree with you to go jump off the largest cliff they can find.

 

[Skreeee]

But it's proven that when a woman becomes the provider for a man and his family, she becomes less attracted to him for not being more masculine, so she cheats on him, or just leaves them, so that's why men don't want women to be powerful, because you won't need us anymore, so it's equally a man and a woman's fault.

1)Proof of proof please.

2)Way to blanket all career women as cheating, shallow whores. Dipshit.

 

[SnowCold]

What's that big deal? If he tell's you to go to the kitchen, go to the kitchen.

Spoiler

so you can get a knife and stab him in the face

Agreed.
I say this to my lady friends all the time (at least, the ones I'm close wtih,) and I expect nothing less than a grevious facial wound from them.

I'd be disappointed if they acted any other way.

Yeah, boiling oil is SOOO out.

 

[salbarragan]

If I held a door open for a girlfriend and she went off on one about chauvinism or something akin to that, I'd laugh and slam the door in their face. It's called courtesy. I'd do it for anyone I liked or respected.

Agreed, the amount of times I hold open doors in shops or let someone get in the queue at the bus stop, to only have them or others to exhibit a confused or even angry expression, is staggering. Honestly I'd of recieved less hassle by shutting the doors into said persons or just not letting that old woman into the queue, than have to face the result of them or those around them starting an arguement over how I "Shouldn't get involved with other people"...
It's staggering the amount of people who are that insecure about such an insignificant event, when you are only being decent and polite. If you want gender stats, then it's about 50|50 M|F, so both sexes show how little they trust in the intentions of other people.

Story cut short, people are incourtious bastards, despite gender, and is more of a result of societies misgivings than equality.

The belief of chivalry came about in the middle ages because men believed that women where inferior (just like children) and had to be treated "special" because they couldn't take care of themselves properly. The whole romanticized thing that we have now came out centuries later. I think that if people stop thinking about chivalry and start thinking about politeness, than we will get along better. I've held doors and had them held for me. That was because it was the right thing to do. People, get your heads out of your behinds and just start taking things at face value. Some days, a smile is just a smile.

 

[Motiv_]

So, what again is the OP asking? I'd like to help, but am afraid to give the wrong advice.

 

[AkJay]

But it's proven that when a woman becomes the provider for a man and his family, she becomes less attracted to him for not being more masculine, so she cheats on him, or just leaves them, so that's why men don't want women to be powerful, because you won't need us anymore, so it's equally a man and a woman's fault.

1)Proof of proof please.

2)Way to blanket all career women as cheating, shallow whores. Dipshit.

1) Here is your Proof: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1205139/The-men-transforming-female-hybrids-dab-hands-dusting.html?ITO=1490

2) I did NOT say call career women were cheating, shallow whores, and calling me dipshit gets you reported, have a nice day =]

 

[Antlers]

I wouldn't be bound to the kitchen for very long. My cooking = epic food poisoning. Not intentionally. Well, if it doesn't = epic food poisoning, it'll be cheese on toast or cereal.