I have a question more geared towards the males on this forum but everyone is free to respond

[LordKraven]

My wife says the same thing. I have been a gamer/nerd for years, all through school and she hit on my and tried to get with me for some time before i really noticed (wasent used to it I guess). But eventualy we got together and are not married, but sometimes she gives me crap when I give her crap about being with a nerd, but she dosent seem to care I guess.

 

[MrSnugglesworth]

I like to think I'm a pretty sharp guy.

I used to hang out with a girl at work occasionally (she has a boyfriend)

One day our friendship just goes away, I ask why. Apparently she's had a crush on me the entire time and just never said anything. She felt we were getting "too close" and broke it off.

I just flat out wasn't aware of this.

I think sometimes girls just don't give clear signals. Guys, not wanting to be stalkers, wait for clear signs.

Pow. Exactly this. I see girls making small moves, but I cant tell if they're making a move on me, or just an accident. I dont make a move fast because this girl accidentally put her hand on mine, except it was accidental, and I got crushed. So I wait for a more clear sign.

 

[kazork]

I honestly think a standardized legal process should be instituted. Anybody who wishes to ask another person out on a date submits a Potential Romantic Engagement Form, complete with name, vital stats, and contact details. A response before the printed deadline indicates there are potential sparks!

After your first date, take a few minutes to look over your Post-Engagement Feedback Sheet, and see where you were Mr. Right and where you were Mr. Wrong. No fuss! No muss! No ambiguities or misread signs!

You should read WE by some russian author. It's a 1984 kind of book, but you just wrote down the procedure they have in the book when you want to hook up with someone.

 

[the_tramp]

A mixture of low self-esteem due to girls screwing around with us and poor interpretation of signals. In addition we aren't intuitive and do not interpret an eyelash flutter as flirting, when you do that we think you're blinking.

 

[Grumman]

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

If we're taking a vote, I'm for road flares.

 

[Cortheya]

I don't know about everyone else but i have low self esteme

 

[Frank_Sinatra_]

Five bucks say the OP is male.

Anyway, am I attractive? Nah. Lazy eye kinda has this effect on people... "Hey! I have bad genetics!"

Also going bald, which combined with weedy, thin hair doesn't make a pretty sight (I look mean when I'm bald); my facial hair is pretty whack too, thicker on my face and the rest of me than on my head. Icing on the cake is hyperkeratosis.

Yeah, lacking in physical beauty...which is fiiiiiine with me.

SWEET! I'm 5 bucks richer! Hey one of my friends has a lazy eye and he uses it to his advantage. Hell he's dating my twin sister (she was very a very sought out woman).

Generally, gamers and nerds are sometimes stigmatized by 'jocks', which often results in low self esteem. For this reason, they often think of themselves less handsome than they are, which answers your first question.

This right here.
I found a remedy though males so LISTEN UP!
In one of my classes the speech professor recorded our speech and before hand I got a hair cut and hated it. Usually I relied on my beard to make me look my age or older (I'm 19 with my beard I looked 21). While watching that video me with my haircut and no beard I said "Damn, I look good!"
So the Remedy is, record yourself doing something so you can look at yourself without your eyes. I now think I'm awesome looking.
Time to go ask out a girl!
*gets slapped*

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

If we're taking a vote, I'm for road flares.

I vote fireworks or a loud bang.

 

[Yegargeburble]

I know I am not attractive, mostly due to a lack of caring whether or not I am, and if some has found me attractive, no way I noticed it...I am the most oblivious person in the world.

EDIT: Insofar as speech habits though, I don't really talk to people at all, but I am still easily able to speak to anyone.

 

[Revernd Awesome]

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

If we're taking a vote, I'm for road flares.

We can't have that.

I'd walk down the street and it'd be like November the 5th.
(4th of July for yanks)

 

[Rajin Cajun]

Perhaps because of the assumption that it could all be a joke?

Pretty much this I had a friend and she did that a lot which pretty much grated on my nerves hence we don't talk much anymore. Of course since then she has been a stripper and is now shacked up with some guy she met on Myspace oh the lulz.

Anyways in my entire life I can say I have only noticed one girl who actually liked me and it was a mutual thing that went pretty well for a while. Of course she was obvious as hell which made it easy to not misconstrue what she was thinking.

 

[Lullabye]

Five bucks say the OP is male.

Anyway, am I attractive? Nah. Lazy eye kinda has this effect on people... "Hey! I have bad genetics!"

Also going bald, which combined with weedy, thin hair doesn't make a pretty sight (I look mean when I'm bald); my facial hair is pretty whack too, thicker on my face and the rest of me than on my head. Icing on the cake is hyperkeratosis.

Yeah, lacking in physical beauty...which is fiiiiiine with me.

SWEET! I'm 5 bucks richer! Hey one of my friends has a lazy eye and he uses it to his advantage. Hell he's dating my twin sister (she was very a very sought out woman).

Generally, gamers and nerds are sometimes stigmatized by 'jocks', which often results in low self esteem. For this reason, they often think of themselves less handsome than they are, which answers your first question.

This right here.
I found a remedy though males so LISTEN UP!
In one of my classes the speech professor recorded our speech and before hand I got a hair cut and hated it. Usually I relied on my beard to make me look my age or older (I'm 19 with my beard I looked 21). While watching that video me with my haircut and no beard I said "Damn, I look good!"
So the Remedy is, record yourself doing something so you can look at yourself without your eyes. I now think I'm awesome looking.
Time to go ask out a girl!
*gets slapped*

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

If we're taking a vote, I'm for road flares.

I vote fireworks or a loud bang.

how about something less likley to kill people, like, say, getting an erection, for girls im not sure what they would do, they'll figure it out.

 

[Grimlock_Smash]

I didn't read every reply, but I'm going to go with this: a lack of socialization with females during the prepubescent/puberty stages. These gamers are usually associating with other males, and assume that since there are no girls, they are not attractive (the limited association with females being that many girls do not play games, or are stereotyped if they do). The limited interaction then leads to an inability to determine what the women are truly saying. Also, if they lack confidence, then they simply do not want to get their hopes up, only to have them dashed.

 

[Grimrider6]

We can't have that.

I'd walk down the street and it'd be like November the 5th.
(4th of July for yanks)

Remember, Remember...

 

[Mr Fatherland]

It's just our brain. I bet probably that over half of the males on the escapist are wearing the clothes they wore yesterday, where as girls spend a lot more time sorting themselves out in the morning. I assume you're talking about teenagers here, because most teenage boys are very... Emo. We can sulk for hours and not know why. Also, we are VERY shy, so don't expect any teenage boys to be writing poems for you and singing them out loud in class. It just doesn't happen.

 

[VonVirgo]

Because High School is/was a pool of hate and emasculation.

 

[Frank_Sinatra_]

SNIP

SNIP

SNIP

SNIP

I suggest a universal sign of attraction!

If we're taking a vote, I'm for road flares.

I vote fireworks or a loud bang.

how about something less likley to kill people, like, say, getting an erection, for girls im not sure what they would do, they'll figure it out.

I don't know even that might kill someone... *wink wink*
Woooo.... Yes sir, having the flu is doing wonders to my brain.
Well fireworks won't kill anyone.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

For me, in spite of the fact that I definintely get my share of exercise and I know I'm one pretty bastard, I'm not used to the idea of me being attractive to others, considering that I am a nerd and I used to be chubby and unpleasant. I know there's girls who have crushes on me, some horrendously ugly and some remarkably good-looking, it's somewhat difficult for me to grasp on a subconscious level that I am attractive.

 

[Danzaivar]

Social inability. Even if a gamer-guy has a feeling a lass likes them they won't act on it because they probably aren't sure how to go about it, or if they're reading in to it wrong, or they might get rejected.

It's basically over-analysing everything to a point where it's crippling (Which is probably why guys freeze up a lot, over analyse stuff and find it hard to think of the 'best' thing to say). And if they don't over-analyse then, due to lack of experience or context, they'll say something in-appropriate or just boring.

Personally I ignore women until they go away or basically throw themselves at me in desperation. Safest way to not get wrong-footed (If you're attractive anyway, not to be big headed or owt)

 

[TwistedEllipses]

Low self esteem probably. Cynicism could also play a part...

Plus, it's sometimes true.

This pretty much gives my comprehensive opinion.