In My Defense...

[Azraellod]

in my defense, emotions are unnecessary and get in the way. besides, there is no way you can be sad about it.

you stole part of my house with an army of helicopters.

 

[LilGherkin]

In My Defense I took the part of the house that didn't have you in it.

You stole my garbage can!

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, it kicked down my wall. it needs to be trained properly.

you set my new hat on fire.

 

[TheOrangeSocks]

In my defense, it looked better on fire.

You molested my pet gerbil with a violin!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, it was the only thing I had on hand. It's not like I was going to actually molest it myself, you know.

You put a dent in my wall!

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, i needed one to install the new light switch there.
[sup]see, i was being nice[/sup]

you accused me of vandalising your property without checking the facts.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, you were quite suspicious.

You broke all the light bulbs in my house!

 

[Lord_Ascendant]

In my defense, I'm MacGyver and they were looking at me funny

You've assassinated all the leaders of every European country except Greece

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, the overlord wished it, so it was done.

You insulted the overlord. The overlord is mad.

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, it is my intention to replace him, as he is losing his touch. him losing his temper proves that.

you covered my floor in engine oil. i slipped and hurt myself.

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, it wasn't quite empty. there was still a tiny bit left at the bottom...

you sprayed my wall with graffiti.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, it was national Spray a Wall with Graffiti Day and I chose yours.

You threw acid in my food.

 

[LilGherkin]

In My Defense it was incredibly basic so I balanced out the pH level of it. You're welcome.

You broke all of my lights.

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, i see better in the dark. i needed an advantage.

you wedged a knife into my spine.

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, you said you had an ache there. I was trying acupuncture.

You bought me!

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, it wasn't for the deranged reasons other people had for doing it.
[sup]no, i was just going to nail your feet to the floor, give you a computer, and force you to forever play forum games.[/sup]

you smashed my electric chair.

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, you were getting too reliant on it.
[sup]I see. Well, I suppose that's not too bad.[/sup]

You used a child as a battering ram!

 

[Azraellod]

in my defense, it had a very thick skull.
[sup]i'd have been nicer, only it went to the forum games, and i become more malicious here.[/sup]

you applied a drill to my brothers head.