In My Defense...

[Neonbob]

In my defense, it attacked me with malicious intent. It was pure self defense.

You let yourself get chased off by a goose!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, geese are evil.


You bred an army of geese.

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, it seemed like a funny idea at the time.
Hell, it still does!

You stole my mediciiine!

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, nobody will mess with me now!

You can't type!
Edit: Ninja'd but it works (?)

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I'm typing with my feet!

You burnt my dinner!

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, I had to tend to the baby!

You forgot about the baby!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, I thought it was in the oven!

You took it out!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I was trained to!

You punched me in the face!

 

[Sassafrass]

In my defence, you stole my damn baby!

You kept hold of mah baby!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, you're a damned crack whore!

You injected Mr.Bimkin with steroids!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, he was looking a little weak.


You knocked me out.

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, you were getting hysterical.

You tried to give me a panic attack!

 

[Sassafrass]

In my defence, a clown told me to do it under pain of death.

You made a clown wound my father!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, it was the funniest thing I've seen all year!

You wrote an entire page of puns!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, it was lazy writing.

You stole the Mona Lisa!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, I wanted to give it to you.


You refused my gift.

 

[Sassafrass]

In my defence, it was a load of poisonous snakes on a plane.
I don't like planes.

You hit me in the face with a clowns shoe!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, it squeaked.
I like hitting people with squeaky things.

You hypnotized me!

 

[Sassafrass]

In my defence, I needed someone expendable to distract the police while I robbed a bank.

You arrested me!

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, you were killing a man with a spoon!

You used that spoon to eat right after!