In My Defense...

[SnootyEnglishman]

In my defense i'm raising an army of Kitty Mercenaries.


You jammed my AK-47

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I didn't know you could really jam guns with your fingers!

You took my lunch money!

 

[SnootyEnglishman]

In my defense you owed me from last week



YOu ran up my phone bill

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, those were very important calls!

You broke my phone!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, I wanted to see what it looked like on the inside.


Your phone was dead inside!

 

[SnootyEnglishman]

In my defense it was dead when i took it from the box


You thought an obivous bad movie was good

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, I was trying to trick you into watching it.


You didn't watch the movie!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I was too tired to watch it!

You continuously woke me up!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, the house was ON FIRE!


You set the house ON FIRE!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, It was fricking freezing!

You threw snow at me!

 

[Neonbob]

In my defense, you were really hot. So I thought I'd help you cool down!

You put my mother on a sled on the summit of Everest!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, you said you didn't know what to give her for Christmas.


You wanted me to kill your own mother!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, You think that help means kill!

You tried to kill my friends, knowing what you were doing!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, they were too clingy.


You tried to kill my friends!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I thought they liked arsenic Ice cream!

You made me lose my job!

 

[Ren3004]

In my defense, you put arsenic in your customers' ice cream.


You killed your customers!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, I truly thought that I wasn't the only one who liked arsenic ice cream!

You didn't defend me in court!

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

In my defense, I was in a different country!

You left me when I was not looking!

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

In my defense, that's how hide and seek works!

You didn't find me!