Mall Fight Comedy - (take a peek inside!)

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Connor Lonske

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"But wait, isn't RaN the king of hell, so doesn't he have that under control?" says Connor "But then again, no one can completely control hell, so maybe if we just, I don't know, cut hell off so that no one can get out of it's elevator shaft ever again? I don't know, what do you think?"
 

RaNDM G

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[HEADING=1]IN OTHERWORLD![/HEADING]

Exploring the remains of the mall, I come across the corpses of several rakes. I carefully step around them and reach the clock tower, which is now surprisingly standing.

"Well, at least I've got a place to call home for the time being."

I settle into the top floor.
 

Connor Lonske

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*LEVEL UP*

Skills:
Barter: 50 from 20

Perks: "Here and Now"


*LEVEL UP*

Skills:
Barter: 80 from 50

Perks: "Jolly Kirby"

Can take one perk from dead enemies that you kill. Also you hate your boss (if you have one).


"Can we kill RaN?" Says Connor, "I mean, yeah, pissing off the leader of hell would be bad, but he just fucked up our plan, right?"

No RaN, that was cool, keep going
 

RaNDM G

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Connor Lonske said:
*LEVEL UP*No RaN, that was cool, keep going.
Maybe later, but it would mess with the story if I put it back in.

[HEADING=1]IN OTHERWORLD![/HEADING]

"Well, that about does it."

I have finished renovating the clock tower into my own personal fortress. From the computer system here, I can observe everything that occurs in both the Mall and Otherworld. It doesn't take long for me to find Tox, Connor, and some other guy I've never met walking through the mall.

"Great. Let's see what's going on."

After watching the trio's progress for half-an-hour, I slowly discover that nothing is really happening.

"Guess it's time to do what I do best."

I cook a pizza, enjoy a nice meal, then fall asleep on the couch.
 

Connor Lonske

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"Hey, let me read some!" Connor says as he grabs the file. He read is.

"The first mall is complete, apparently the advertisement on Crags list for higher powers to have a gentleman's fight with no weapons and no powers is a big hit. Must expand to weapons soon, this is stressful, think I will go to the mortal world and kill another incident. Not like we care! Ha ha ha ha!-Sister August, 24 2005 Man, she is crazy."

Connor keeps reading "The other higher powers want out, this is just terrible. I can't let them go so soon, I was just having fun! Well, maybe I should just sell this mall to hell, fuck the others, they had there fun. Now, were will I get new players? Think about it later, must kill humans first.-Sister December, 20 2005"

"Here, you read the next one." Connor passes the files to Tox.
 

Connor Lonske

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"I, think I lived in New York, I-" Connor tries to remember "I was just a poor boy, unhappy with life. I just, wanted an escape, wanted to die, so I though I would let someone else do it for me. I hoped the note was not a trap, but even if it was at least I would of been gone. Then, I just remember..."

Connor pauses, "Look, it's a really long story about the time between leaving the real world and getting to the mall, I assume it took me for ever to get here but I know that whatever happened it was important. I need to focus to remember it, you want to hear it?"
 

Connor Lonske

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"OK," Connor says "When I dropped the note in the malls garbage pale, after my long trip from the slums to the Jersey side, I remember hearing a female voice, like sister's, it said 'Are you read to be taken away from this horrible world!'"

I didn't think twice about it Yes nice lad- but before I could finish that sentence, I was stopped by a police officer, who had knew my face due to missing posters 'Don't worry boy, your safe now!' then, I hear a chainsaw, and the cop pushes me away, but he pushes to hard and I harm my leg. By the time I look back the police officer was cut in two by Sister, other had moved near her and tried to stop her but they all fell to her spinning blades. Me, being more afraid then ever, I somehow find her, attractive. The killing, the violence, it appealed to me, like an ich."

"Then, next thing I know, I'm in my subconscious, and I spend my time there for two years, living my life the way I wanted it, like a badass. In my mind, I teach myself how to use firearms, use blades, and live my life all happy, not a fat boy with love issues. Then, I go to a mall, with my saber and my Leather Jacket..." Connor looks at his Jacket, and sees it is full of holes, knife stabs, "...and and I find a in the clothing section a cyborg and a Dalek. After that, came the events of the mall that I was a part of, and that it."
 

Connor Lonske

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"Wow... man, our lives sucked. We both die in a mall, get sucked into our subconscious, and end up here in this shit hole of a place and kill each other because our lust for badassness corrupted us." Connor said, "We have to tell the others, we have to find a way out damn it!"
 

Connor Lonske

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"I-I, don't know if we can fucking can." Connor says as he starts to cool down, "I mean, we all have been here for months, a-and stuff, and longer in our subconscious. I mean-" Connor pauses.

They sit there as Tox silently cries, and Connor's mind goes completely blank.

...

Connor then suddenly yells "SISTER! YOU ARE GOING TO FUCKING PAY!!!" Connor gets up, "I KNOW YOU CAN SEE US YOU *****! COME HERE NOW AND FIGHT ME! I'LL KILL YOU!!!" Connor passes around the park as Tox gets up, still tearing a little, trying to stop Connor.

"COME ON! YOU FUCKING *****! COME OUT HERE!" Still walking around the indoor park with his knife out. Tox pulls his shoulder and turns Connor around to him.
 

Connor Lonske

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"But how are we supposed to break past hell the locked gate hell, in the elevator?" Connor says, thinking that this is a bad idea, still distressed from his growing memory of the past.

I lay in my bed, head in my pillow, crying. A song plays on my CD player, "Bell Boy"


My head rises from the pillow, my tear start to stop.

---
The elevator races down, getting faster every second, song still playing in my head. "We are going to pass though the walls, this elevator strong enough to resit it's strength." say Xox.
---
"A beach is a place were a man, hes the only soul in a world that is real!"
---
We get closer to the walls.
---
"But I see a face, coming though the haze, I remember him from those crazy days!"
---
"OH FUCK! OH FUCK! OH FUCK!" we all yell as we get close to the blocks that cover the bottom of the elevator shaft.
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"Ain't you the guy who used to set the paces, riding up in front of a hundred faces, I don't suppose you would remember me, but I used to follow you back in SIXTY-THREE!"
---
We crash though the first gate, no damage.
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BELL BOY!
---
We crash though the next one.
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BELL BOY!
---
We crash though them so fast, we hit the rest at once.
---
ALWAYS RUNNING AT SOMEONE'S HEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLllllllllllllllllllll-da da-Elllllllllllllll.
---
I faint, my body hits the ceiling.
 

Connor Lonske

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"Ugggh, what?" Connor says, trying to get back to his sense, remember what happened before went into the elevator. "Mannnnn, that is what you call a bad trip."

He get up and looks out of the elevator. "Man, are we at the same mall?"

They exit the elevator to find they are in a mall, different from the two other malls. It is full of dead bodies and walking pedestrians, both unaware of each other.

"I think we are in a combo of the malls we were at before we came into our subconscious" Connor say as they keep walking though the mall, looking at the pedestrians as if they were crazy, them not noticing.
 

Connor Lonske

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"Maybe we should split up?" Connor pause for a moment and then hits himself in the face for being so stupid.
 

RaNDM G

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[HEADING=1]IN OTHERWORLD![/HEADING]

I startle myself awake, having dreamt of Tox and Connor enduring a tearful and very melodramatic revelation of their origins, culminating in a crashing elevator.

RaN: "Jeezus, who comes up with this stuff? I really gotta stop eating pizza before I go to bed."

I return to the monitors and quickly find Connor and Tox sleeping on the floor

RaN: "The fuck is this?"

I get on the intercom system.

RaN: "Hey! It's called Mall FIGHT! Go kill something!"

No response. The two continue to sleep.
 

Connor Lonske

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Connor stands by the door, speechless. The room transforms into the three way path from the start. Tox sits in the middle, still crying. Connor walks off to the right, and sees a Game Express, an independent game retailer from Connor's original neighborhood. He walks in, but the store is empty, except for a TV, a Sega Genesis, and a copy of Zombie Ate My Neighbors.

"I know this game." Connor sit down and turns on the Genesis. He picks the guy, as always. "It's just how I remember..." Connor plays the game, and makes it to the second level. "I know this." he keeps playing, and more memory come back to him.

"They say he retarded, I mean how can a kid fail first grade?"

"He is just... I don't know, I am sure he will be better."


Third level...

"Hey, fattie. How are those video games, eh?"

"Please, I am trying to play my gameboy."

"Well, how you like the gameboy if it's out that window.

"Heh heh heh heh."

"Give it back"

"Nooooooooo


Fourth Level...

"Oh my god he's got a knife!"

"Take if from him before he hurt himself!"


Fifth Level...

"Connor, I'm sorry I've driven you crazy, please come back! PLEASE!"

"Kristen?"

Connor drops his controller, gets up, and walks out of the store.

"Ah, still alive, Mr. Kennedy..."