Mall Fight Comedy - (take a peek inside!)
- Thread starter Claymorez
- Start date
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"I wanna see some goddamn elephants..." I mumble to myself, I
the Auditor, "Fuckin' signs don't tell me what to do."
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EXTERMINATEThe Auditor resembles his body next to them and says "What was that for and what is with the fucking elephants?"
Tricky lols as he hears all this go on across the mall.
Tricky lols as he hears all this go on across the mall.
I start riding the elephants, "Shit is awesome now!", I flatten The Auditor by accident in a cartoon-ish fashion.
The Auditor literally pulls him self up very cartoon like and says. "If you can't kill me with energy based weapons why would you think a elephant would work?!"
[HEADING=1]Back all Mall 2 on the main floor.[/HEADING]
Connor stands up, "OK, lets go to the Mojave!" he says.
Alexander teleports them there as Waffle's elephant runs over Backroom, his power armor taking all of the damage. "Man, even back now that guy is crazy." says Backroom as he gets up as Waffles speeds off.
"I bet he will take the elephant into deathclaw territory." says Connor.
"Well, I don't want to spoil anything but he does and they kill his elephant." says Alexander.
"You do realize he has 10 perception and likely heard you say that." says Connor.
"Oh, he did, he just goes anyways." says Backroom.
[HEADING=1]Back all Mall 2 on the main floor.[/HEADING]
Connor stands up, "OK, lets go to the Mojave!" he says.
Alexander teleports them there as Waffle's elephant runs over Backroom, his power armor taking all of the damage. "Man, even back now that guy is crazy." says Backroom as he gets up as Waffles speeds off.
"I bet he will take the elephant into deathclaw territory." says Connor.
"Well, I don't want to spoil anything but he does and they kill his elephant." says Alexander.
"You do realize he has 10 perception and likely heard you say that." says Connor.
"Oh, he did, he just goes anyways." says Backroom.
I groan, "I just came vacation! Why I gotta think of a plan!?" I sigh and roll my eyes, "Well first, we need to to connect the two malls, I still have control over some Daemons so we might be in luck. Secondly, since me and RaN are the only ones with power now, we need defeat Sister or at least knock the powers out of her and amscray to fight another day. Finally, we need to get a cushioned saddle for this pachyderm here, my balls are killing me."
I crush something, "The hell was that?" I jump off the elephant, however the elephant keeps going into Deathclaw territory, as foretold, he dies.
I see Connor and some new people, "Hey, Conny! 'Sup, brah!"
I crush something, "The hell was that?" I jump off the elephant, however the elephant keeps going into Deathclaw territory, as foretold, he dies.
I see Connor and some new people, "Hey, Conny! 'Sup, brah!"
[HEADING=1]IN THE MOJAVE![/HEADING]
Peering through my scope on my rifle, I continue to spy on the reunion from the Mall's rooftop.
RaN: "Don't you think this seems a little convenient?"
Alphonse:
RaN: "I just think it's weird that both Ren AND Waffles showed up here at the exact same time. I think they're planning something."
Alphonse:
RaN: "Wait and see what happens next."
[HEADING=1]ELSEWHERE IN THE MOJAVE[/HEADING]
NaR wanders through a dark tunnel.
NaR: "It's been over two goddamned weeks since I've been trapped in these tunnels. How the Hell am I supposed to get out of here?"
Suddenly, NaR trips.
NaR: "Can't even fucking see down here."
???: "Mmmmph! Mmmmmmmph!"
NaR: "The fuck was that?"
Feeling around, NaR discovers that he has tripped over someone who has been bound and gagged. NaR scrambles to untie him, generating a small amount of electricity in his hands to use as a light.
???: "Phew. Thanks for that."
NaR: "What are you doing down here?"
???: "I dunno. I spawned down here a few weeks ago. Last thing I remember was somebody hitting me in the back of the head. When I woke up I was tied up here."
NaR: "So, what do they call you?"
"The name is Ren. Nice to meet you."
[HEADING=1]ON THE ROOFTOP![/HEADING]
RaN: "Did you see that?"
Alphonse:
RaN: "He twitched!"
Alphonse:
RaN: "Ren. It looked like his face scrunched up for a second there."
Alphonse:
RaN: "Hold that thought."
Zooming in on the scope, I notice the skin flake off the back of Ren's neck, revealing what appears to be some kind of black, cybernetic material. An orange sphere glows underneath the cybernetics
RaN: "Oh my God."
I take a look at Waffles and also notice the skin on the back of his neck is shedding.
RaN: "It's a trap! We need to get down there!"
Alphonse and I pack up our gear and head downstairs. Looking out the window, I spot Connor talking with Waffles. I bang my fist against the glass.
RaN: HEY COOL GUY! UP HERE!
Peering through my scope on my rifle, I continue to spy on the reunion from the Mall's rooftop.
RaN: "Don't you think this seems a little convenient?"
Alphonse:
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How do you mean?Alphonse:
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What should we do?[HEADING=1]ELSEWHERE IN THE MOJAVE[/HEADING]
NaR wanders through a dark tunnel.
NaR: "It's been over two goddamned weeks since I've been trapped in these tunnels. How the Hell am I supposed to get out of here?"
Suddenly, NaR trips.
NaR: "Can't even fucking see down here."
???: "Mmmmph! Mmmmmmmph!"
NaR: "The fuck was that?"
Feeling around, NaR discovers that he has tripped over someone who has been bound and gagged. NaR scrambles to untie him, generating a small amount of electricity in his hands to use as a light.
???: "Phew. Thanks for that."
NaR: "What are you doing down here?"
???: "I dunno. I spawned down here a few weeks ago. Last thing I remember was somebody hitting me in the back of the head. When I woke up I was tied up here."
NaR: "So, what do they call you?"
"The name is Ren. Nice to meet you."
[HEADING=1]ON THE ROOFTOP![/HEADING]
RaN: "Did you see that?"
Alphonse:
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What?Alphonse:
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Who?Alphonse:
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I hardly think that's anything notewor-Zooming in on the scope, I notice the skin flake off the back of Ren's neck, revealing what appears to be some kind of black, cybernetic material. An orange sphere glows underneath the cybernetics
RaN: "Oh my God."
I take a look at Waffles and also notice the skin on the back of his neck is shedding.
RaN: "It's a trap! We need to get down there!"
Alphonse and I pack up our gear and head downstairs. Looking out the window, I spot Connor talking with Waffles. I bang my fist against the glass.
RaN: HEY COOL GUY! UP HERE!
RaN: IT'S A TRAP! GET OUT OF THER-
Before Connor can hear me finish, the Waffles imposter punches him in the back and out through his chest.
Connor: "Not... cool... guy."
Connor falls dead to the floor.
RaN: "Goddammit!"
I escape with Alphonse to formulate a new plan.
Before Connor can hear me finish, the Waffles imposter punches him in the back and out through his chest.
Connor: "Not... cool... guy."
Connor falls dead to the floor.
RaN: "Goddammit!"
I escape with Alphonse to formulate a new plan.
The Auditor gets to Connor's body after Robo Waffles walks off. "Hummm, get up asshole."
"No." says Connor's spirit.
"GET UP!"
"Can't, I'm dead."
"I SAID GET UP!" he says as he reincarnates Connor with his demonic powers!
*LEVEL UP!*
Robo Waffles hears Connor and raises his hand to exterminate him, but RaN starts firing his sniper after just getting to that floor. "Get out of here!" he yells.
"No." says Connor's spirit.
"GET UP!"
"Can't, I'm dead."
"I SAID GET UP!" he says as he reincarnates Connor with his demonic powers!
*LEVEL UP!*
Connor points to the Auditor and yells "KNOCK IT OFF!"
Robo Waffles hears Connor and raises his hand to exterminate him, but RaN starts firing his sniper after just getting to that floor. "Get out of here!" he yells.
Robo Waffles goes of to fight RaN from across the mall.
"Yeah, I just died, then I came back, and now I have Auditor powers." says Connor.
Backroom and Alexander runs over, "Yeah, we forgot to tell you that that wasn't Waffles."
"Yeah, I just died, then I came back, and now I have Auditor powers." says Connor.
Backroom and Alexander runs over, "Yeah, we forgot to tell you that that wasn't Waffles."
Robo Waffles gives an automated laugh and says, "
", it gives a sonic ping locating it's victims, he starts looking for Tox first, "
", it's robotic steps echo through the halls of the Mall.
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Foolish humans. You honestly think you can hide?
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Ready or not, here I come.Robo Waffles loses its targets, he gives an automated sigh, "
", it searches it's databanks, "110010101010000101010010010101010-", it continues with the long binary code.
[HEADING=1]BRRRRRRRRRZIPP[/HEADING]
It appears in the Canadian Mall, "-1.", it gives a sonic ping and searches for Tox again.
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I hate doing this.[HEADING=1]BRRRRRRRRRZIPP[/HEADING]
It appears in the Canadian Mall, "-1.", it gives a sonic ping and searches for Tox again.
[HEADING=1]IN THE MOJAVE![/HEADING]
After Robo Waffles teleports away in pursuit of Connor and Tox, Robo Ren picks up the signal on Alphonse. He fires a missile from his wrist, destroying a wall and exposing us.
Alphonse:
We run for our lives.
[HEADING=3]THIRTY MINUTES LATER![/HEADING]
Robo Ren continues to chase Alphonse and I through the mall. I find an entrance to what appears to be some kind of service tunnel.
RaN: "We can lose him in here."
We duck inside.
After Robo Waffles teleports away in pursuit of Connor and Tox, Robo Ren picks up the signal on Alphonse. He fires a missile from his wrist, destroying a wall and exposing us.
Alphonse:
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Well, this sucks.[HEADING=3]THIRTY MINUTES LATER![/HEADING]
Robo Ren continues to chase Alphonse and I through the mall. I find an entrance to what appears to be some kind of service tunnel.
RaN: "We can lose him in here."
We duck inside.
Robo Waffles signal is lost, "
", he searches for his victims on foot.
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Uncool. Very [b]uncool[/b]A ping goes off in Robo Waffles head, "
", it slowly hovers to where Tox is.
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Oh, someone feel into my Lotus Eater trap.
The area is filled with purple gas, Robo Waffles, unaffected by the gas, carries Tox over his shoulder.
"Excellent work.", says a voice in Robo Waffles head, "Come back to the base immediately."
"110010101010000101010010010101010-"
[HEADING=1]BRRRRRRZIP[/HEADING]
"-1" Robo Waffles appears...somewhere, somewhere not I even, the narrator, can describe, I just know that Waffles, the real Waffles is somewhere in somewhere.
"Excellent work.", says a voice in Robo Waffles head, "Come back to the base immediately."
"110010101010000101010010010101010-"
[HEADING=1]BRRRRRRZIP[/HEADING]
"-1" Robo Waffles appears...somewhere, somewhere not I even, the narrator, can describe, I just know that Waffles, the real Waffles is somewhere in somewhere.