Mall Fight Comedy - (take a peek inside!)

[Stone Wera]

"Yes. Yes you may. The mall was built on an Indian burial ground that was haunted by the ghost of Hitler who was mutated by radiation from a nearby nuclear testing grounds into the monster that's right behind you! Just kidding, he died from radiation poisoning. A serial killer from a nearby town was chased onto the Indian burial grounds by angry townfolk and stoned to death. A few months later a mad scientist found both dead ghost Hitler and the serial killer known only as Jeff and sewed them together in an attempt to create the most evil creature known to man, only to be beaten by Mr. Gates & Mrs. Gates. The creature escaped, killing the scientist and rampaging throughout the nearby areas until a UFO crash landed into it at the aforementioned burial grounds, which incedentally happened to be in Roswell, New Mexico. ten years later a mall was built on top, sounds like a bad campfire story, amiright? That's why I neglected to tell you, I thought you'd be disappointed."

 

[WafflesandBacon]

"Yo, Xandus!" I wave to him.

 

[Stone Wera]

I respawn in the control room, which is now orbiting Earth, and press a large yellow button. Xandus is bombarded with all the corpses of the fallen players, crushing him instantly.

 

[Knife-28]

In the sewers the body of a hobo washes ashore. A rat skurries over to it. Cofused, the rat skurries inside the hobo's shirt and emerges dragging a piece of cloth. Upon the cloth, written in small, gold script, are two words:CODE MONKEY

After being knocked out and thrown out the security center I wake up in a very familiar hole.

 

[WafflesandBacon]

I respawn in a McDonald's, whistling a happy song. I step out.

 

[Knife-28]

I wander the dark tunneles beneath The Mall. As I wander in the darkness hear things, voices whispering right in my ear, static or distortion-like sounds from far off in the labyrinth and ungodly sceams...

 

[Knife-28]

I emerge into from the tunnels to find I'm in the sewers. I wander around for awhile when the wall behind me explodes. When the dust clears there's, "Oh my god, it's Alfred Molina!"
"Dr. Octagonapus!!!!! BBBLLLAAARRRRGGGGG!!!!!!"

 

[Knife-28]

As Martintox runs through the sewers he turns a corner an see's my charred body. "Dr. Octagonapus!!!!! BBBLLLAAARRRRGGGGG!!!!!!"

 

[WafflesandBacon]

I appeared next to Tox, "Hey, whaz-" I see the charred body, I mull over if I should eat it or not.

 

[Knife-28]

A dark shap appeares behind Waffles.
"Dr. Octagonapus!!!!! BBBLLLAAARRRRGGGGG!!!!!!"

 

[Knife-28]

The ground infront of Xandus explodes and a dark shap rises from within.
"Dr. Octagonapus!!!!! BBBLLLAAARRRRGGGGG!!!!!!"

I respawn nearby and, seeing Xandus enveloped in light, I tackle Dr Octagonapus and engage in an epic fight.

 

[Offworlder_v1legacy]

I hear the sounds of battle in the distance. I leg it and find them coming from the mall. "Look's like fun" I say to myself. I run inside dodging all attacks coming my way and find a music shop. I dash inside and find myself a Gretch White Falcon "The power of Jimmy Page protect me" I utter as I leave the store. "COME SOMEONE COME HERE I NEED TO TUNE THIS GUTAIR...ON A FACE!"

 

[Fury Is Me.]

Suddenly, I fly through the mall doing a falcon punch, slam THROUGH Offworlder's face, and out the other end of the mall.

 

[Offworlder_v1legacy]

My body still stands, headless. I run around, running into walls in the process but eventually find the holes in the wall Fury Is Me created. I make my way through them and sense him nearby. I take a swing that general direction and connect with the back of his head with the guitar making the back of his head explode. My body then collapses and I respawn, with guitar intact, in the mens bathrooms.

 

[Stone Wera]

I walk up to Xandus who is engaged in a scrap with a off-brand Dr. Octopus.
"Fool! Your Blood God is no match for the great evil of Micro$oft!"
I install Vista on Xandus, causing him to crash automatically.
"That'll learn ya!"