Mall Fight Comedy - (take a peek inside!)
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The mall slams the doors shut behind martintox, barring themselves form the outside.
"I've been waiting martintox..."
Code Monkey's corpses rises from the chair, turning to martintox. It draws a Hrfyulgh and stads martintox in the shooper da wooper, draining his shoop power.
"Not so tough without your powers are you?"
Code Monkey Corpse crushes the Hrfyulgh in his hand, transferring the power to The Mall.
"Now how would you like a taste of your own medicine?"
The large screen above the control panel activates, a face appears, with large red lips and beady eyes.
"I'MA FIRIN' MAH LASERS!"
Martintox is blasted out of the control room by a large shoop and into the elevator shaft, where the elvator lands on him.
I step out of the elevator.
"Martintox, are you here!? C'mere, boy!"
I whistle for martintox.
"I've got chicken sandwich here for you!"
"I've been waiting martintox..."
Code Monkey's corpses rises from the chair, turning to martintox. It draws a Hrfyulgh and stads martintox in the shooper da wooper, draining his shoop power.
"Not so tough without your powers are you?"
Code Monkey Corpse crushes the Hrfyulgh in his hand, transferring the power to The Mall.
"Now how would you like a taste of your own medicine?"
The large screen above the control panel activates, a face appears, with large red lips and beady eyes.
"I'MA FIRIN' MAH LASERS!"
Martintox is blasted out of the control room by a large shoop and into the elevator shaft, where the elvator lands on him.
I step out of the elevator.
"Martintox, are you here!? C'mere, boy!"
I whistle for martintox.
"I've got chicken sandwich here for you!"
I turn to see martintox half pinned under the elevator. I yank him out and brush the dirt from his back.
"Now don't you go wandering off like that again, a heart attack you near gave me!"
I put the chicken sandwich in his hand and walk into the control room.
"What's this?"
I'm sent flying out by a shoop.
"Now don't you go wandering off like that again, a heart attack you near gave me!"
I put the chicken sandwich in his hand and walk into the control room.
"What's this?"
I'm sent flying out by a shoop.
When the dust clears from the explosion, an angry shoop face is seen on the screen.
"The deeper you go, you dig your own grave."
Martintox is shooped form the control room, I slam the door shut and hold it shut, barely keeping it closed.
"Dammit! Zrofgvuk has the Hrfyulgh!"
I remember the sword I obtained from the skeleton. It wasn't glowing from reflection, because there was no other light, it was the source of the light.
"SirBryghtside, hold the door!"
I draw the blade and run to the heart, raising it above my head and bringing it down, draining the evil and power, turning the sword neutral. The shoops cease and the mall settles, peace returning at last.
The elevator arrives and Zrofgvuk steps out.
"It appears you've dealt with our little problem."
"Yes... We have."
"Of course you know that means our truce is over."
Zrofgvuk draws a neutral Hrfyulgh from his robe, and a drained Chad Warrden Talisman.
"You wouldn't."
"Oh, I would."
He stabs the heart of the mall, transferring the Chad Warrden power and creating a portal to the Llam. The portal sucks all the players through, into an alternate universe. Zrofgvuk sews the portal up and returns to the surface, uninhibited by players, or anyone who would wish to stop him.
[HEADING=1]MEANWHILE, IN THE LLAM...[/HEADING]
"Damn! We're trapped!"
I sit down at the fountain, burying my face in my hands.
"Wait, I still have the other Hrfyulgh!"
I grab Saber.
"You know what that means, don't you!?"
"Not really, enlighten me, will you?"
"If we find the other Chad Warrden, we can use the Hrfyulgh and create another portal to the Mall!"
"The deeper you go, you dig your own grave."
Martintox is shooped form the control room, I slam the door shut and hold it shut, barely keeping it closed.
"Dammit! Zrofgvuk has the Hrfyulgh!"
I remember the sword I obtained from the skeleton. It wasn't glowing from reflection, because there was no other light, it was the source of the light.
"SirBryghtside, hold the door!"
I draw the blade and run to the heart, raising it above my head and bringing it down, draining the evil and power, turning the sword neutral. The shoops cease and the mall settles, peace returning at last.
The elevator arrives and Zrofgvuk steps out.
"It appears you've dealt with our little problem."
"Yes... We have."
"Of course you know that means our truce is over."
Zrofgvuk draws a neutral Hrfyulgh from his robe, and a drained Chad Warrden Talisman.
"You wouldn't."
"Oh, I would."
He stabs the heart of the mall, transferring the Chad Warrden power and creating a portal to the Llam. The portal sucks all the players through, into an alternate universe. Zrofgvuk sews the portal up and returns to the surface, uninhibited by players, or anyone who would wish to stop him.
[HEADING=1]MEANWHILE, IN THE LLAM...[/HEADING]
"Damn! We're trapped!"
I sit down at the fountain, burying my face in my hands.
"Wait, I still have the other Hrfyulgh!"
I grab Saber.
"You know what that means, don't you!?"
"Not really, enlighten me, will you?"
"If we find the other Chad Warrden, we can use the Hrfyulgh and create another portal to the Mall!"
Also, the Mall here is exact opposite of the other, and so are the players. Expect to see (and even combat) your opposite selves.
I dive into the fountain to avoid the tentacle beast, running into my opposite.
"Howdy!" (Wera Stone)
"Um... Salutations... Do you know where the Chad Warrden Talisman is?"
"Why yes, Zeromyalc (Claymorez) had it last, in fact that's why I'm here."
"What do you mean?"
"You see, Zeromyalc was hoarding quite a few Talismans down here in the sewers before his respawn watch turned to five, I came here looking for them."
"Would you mind if I took one?"
"If you insist, but you have to pull your own weight, Zeromyalc wasn't killed by nothing you know."
"What killed him?"
"He was hugged to death. Kuvgforz is down here, along with JesusGhandi..."
"Well that doesn't sound so bad, he was much worse in the Mall."
"I doubt that."
I'm blinded momentarily, a cheeky voice calls out.
"Guess who!?"
"Kuvgforz?"
"Why of course not, it's me, JesusGhandi!"
He removes his hands from my eyes, I turn to see a tall man surrounded by butterflies, with a halo hovering above his head.
"Someone needs a hug!"
He grabs me and begins squeezing, my spine almost shatters and my face turns blue.
"[sub]Help... Me...[/sub]"
Wera Stone jams a crowbar between me and JesusGhandi, prying us apart. After I'm free he grabs my arm and we commence to fleeing.
"Come back! I just want a huuuuuuuuuug!"
"Howdy!" (Wera Stone)
"Um... Salutations... Do you know where the Chad Warrden Talisman is?"
"Why yes, Zeromyalc (Claymorez) had it last, in fact that's why I'm here."
"What do you mean?"
"You see, Zeromyalc was hoarding quite a few Talismans down here in the sewers before his respawn watch turned to five, I came here looking for them."
"Would you mind if I took one?"
"If you insist, but you have to pull your own weight, Zeromyalc wasn't killed by nothing you know."
"What killed him?"
"He was hugged to death. Kuvgforz is down here, along with JesusGhandi..."
"Well that doesn't sound so bad, he was much worse in the Mall."
"I doubt that."
I'm blinded momentarily, a cheeky voice calls out.
"Guess who!?"
"Kuvgforz?"
"Why of course not, it's me, JesusGhandi!"
He removes his hands from my eyes, I turn to see a tall man surrounded by butterflies, with a halo hovering above his head.
"Someone needs a hug!"
He grabs me and begins squeezing, my spine almost shatters and my face turns blue.
"[sub]Help... Me...[/sub]"
Wera Stone jams a crowbar between me and JesusGhandi, prying us apart. After I'm free he grabs my arm and we commence to fleeing.
"Come back! I just want a huuuuuuuuuug!"
Uhluthc grabs martontox by his shirt collar.
"WOULDN'T YOU RATHER STAY FOR A SPOT OF TEA, OLD BEAN?"
Uhluthc holds up a large tea pot, pulling up a seat at a nearby table for martintox, pouring him a cup.
"ONE LUMP OR TWO?"
Uhluthc raises a bowl of sugar cubes.
"WOULDN'T YOU RATHER STAY FOR A SPOT OF TEA, OLD BEAN?"
Uhluthc holds up a large tea pot, pulling up a seat at a nearby table for martintox, pouring him a cup.
"ONE LUMP OR TWO?"
Uhluthc raises a bowl of sugar cubes.
I finally wake up from my nap in the restroom. Walking out I see the mall is in chaos. "WTF?!?" I pick up a golf club and start lookin around.
Zrofgvuk notices a player walking through the Mall.
"And here I thought I Banished all the player to an alternate dimension... This could be a problem."
Zrofgvuk jumps from the balcony and lands behind deonte9109, drawing an evilly charged Hrfyulgh.
"Draw your blade and prepare for swift death!"
"And here I thought I Banished all the player to an alternate dimension... This could be a problem."
Zrofgvuk jumps from the balcony and lands behind deonte9109, drawing an evilly charged Hrfyulgh.
"Draw your blade and prepare for swift death!"
Surprised by the noise behind me I nearly wet myself but I hold up my golf club GTA style ready to do business.
What about martintox, xotnitram, Me, Wera Stone, JesusGhandi, Kuvgforz, Ren3004, 4003Ner, Uhluthc, and Jimmy Hoochinelli?
"Hold on,
I search through my clown suit, pulling out several novelty party tricks and an anchor.
Where is it!?"
"Hurry up, he's gaining on us!"
"Make love, not war!"
I pull out the neutral Hrfyulgh, turning and pointing it at JesusGhandi. He runs into it and impales himself, I transfer the neutral energy to him, turning him into BobJoe.
"..."
And with that, BobJoe rides off into the night, never to be seen again...
Again confused by the chaos in the mall I just run in the opposite direction all the while hoping this is just a really bad acid trip.
Cthulhu grabs deonte9109 and raises him to his mouth, slowly bringing him up to his betentacled mouth before delivering a fat wet smooch, and climbing onto the top on the Empire State Building with deonte9109 under his arm.
After fully realizing that what was happening was real when the Cthulu kissed I fully shat brix and swung with all might the beasts' tentacles not fully realizing that if it does let me go i will be falling for some time.
I look around the Llam and see a female Ren, standing near normal Ren, who's laying next to a male Saber.
"Jeez, can this day get any more confusing?"
"Hey Ner, what's going on?"
"Apparently it can..."
"Jeez, can this day get any more confusing?"
"Hey Ner, what's going on?"
"Apparently it can..."
Me (Knife-28):Red
Saber: Dark Red
82-Efine: Blue
Rebas:Dark Blue
Ok, Now that's cleared up, I can go back to playing Minecraft.
Saber: Dark Red
82-Efine: Blue
Rebas:Dark Blue
Ok, Now that's cleared up, I can go back to playing Minecraft.
The clone promptly gets kicked back down to the bottom of the stairs by a young blue-haired gentleman wielding a golf-club in each hand and a pair of staple-guns, one black, one white, clipped to his belt. The young man leaps down, clearing every step and landing at the bottom of the stairs, with the hitty part of one of his golf-clubs pointed at the clone's throat. "Hello there, I'm not sure we've met. My name's Sam G, and you'll be my first victim in... a very long while." The young man draws back his swinging arm, and smacks the clone's head clean off his shoulders.
Meanwhile, in the upper mall, a figure clad similarly to young Sam G, but with a silvery sheen to his garb, skin and hair, takes to the skies. Leaping off a balcony like Walken in the "Weapon of Choice" music video, he soars above the heads of numerous combatants, throwing shards of glass at any he sees. Eventually he comes across a pair of young people I recognize, being chased by a swarm of horrible beasties. Deactivating his feet-rockets, the ferrous young man comes crashing down on top of the largest of the beasties, then draws his weapon of choice (a spray-can of deoderant and a lighter) and sets to work decimating the Combine hoard. After not too long, the metallic gentleman is standing in a pile of delicious Combine-flavoured ash.
"Good evening, motherfuckers," Mecha-Sam says, spinning around to face Bryghtside and Knife. "Tell me, is it business time? I could almost swear it was..."
Meanwhile, in the upper mall, a figure clad similarly to young Sam G, but with a silvery sheen to his garb, skin and hair, takes to the skies. Leaping off a balcony like Walken in the "Weapon of Choice" music video, he soars above the heads of numerous combatants, throwing shards of glass at any he sees. Eventually he comes across a pair of young people I recognize, being chased by a swarm of horrible beasties. Deactivating his feet-rockets, the ferrous young man comes crashing down on top of the largest of the beasties, then draws his weapon of choice (a spray-can of deoderant and a lighter) and sets to work decimating the Combine hoard. After not too long, the metallic gentleman is standing in a pile of delicious Combine-flavoured ash.
"Good evening, motherfuckers," Mecha-Sam says, spinning around to face Bryghtside and Knife. "Tell me, is it business time? I could almost swear it was..."
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
The multiple Uhluthc clones tip their hats, leaning on their canes and humming God Save The Queen under their collective breath.
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
"SALUTATIONS, OLD BEAN!"
The multiple Uhluthc clones tip their hats, leaning on their canes and humming God Save The Queen under their collective breath.