Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[MinimanZombie]

"BLARGH!"
He shoots several bolts of lightning at them.

Meanwhile I continue walking towards what I think to be my goal. I phone Sigma.
"Dude...What am I even looking for?"

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I Bucking Bronco the pirate, which tosses him into the air. Then, I take out the ADAM harvester and wrench, and drop down onto the pirate's back. I start harvesting ADAM from his body while beating him over the head with the wrench.

 

[MinimanZombie]

It wears off and the pirate angrily rips Trilby off. He grabs the wrench and smashes it into Trilby's face. He then injects himself with an absurd amount of ADAM.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I roll out of the way before the wrench hits me. "Fuck this shit."
I run for the airlock.

 

[MinimanZombie]

The pirate fires a bolt of electricity at Trilby.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

The electricity hits me, however my suit stops it from doing any damage. I step out of the airlock and walk back up to the cockpit.

 

[Saltarius]

I press the intercom button.

"So uh...pirate cap'n. I've been reading some fact sheets and whaddaya know, ADAM decreases both virility and uh...lower girth, so to speak."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I reach the cockpit and kick Knife in the face as I enter through the hole.
"I think we should crash this ship into the nearest planet, then run away. That pirate dude is crazy powerful."

 

[Saltarius]

"Don't we have like a de-OP-ifying ray?"

 

[MinimanZombie]

"It does! Jesus man, what have I been doing?"
He throws it away.
"Good thing I still have my trusty Salts and vigor's though!"
He then downs a bottle of Devils kiss.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Well, yeah, but he'd probably kill us before we could find it." I say. Luckily, a large rifle floats past the cockpit. I can slightly make out the words 'de-OP-ifying ray' on the side. "Never mind."
I jump out of the ship, grab the rifle and... continue floating away from the ship. "Bollocks."

 

[Saltarius]

"Huh. Surveys are saying that vigors can clot your blood flow and salts can paralyze you."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"You know I'm starting to doubt your 'research'. But to be safe..."
He dons a Big Daddy costume, of the Alpha series, drill and all.

 

[Saltarius]

"No man, this is straight from the Donovan Institute from Wales. They're the guys who posted that drinking rat poison can lower your risk of skin cancer."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Pssh. First off, look at my skin, it's impenetrable as shit. Secondly, I got my fancy new suit, don't I? Catch you later suckers."
He drills a hole through a random shop wall, and runs deeper into the mall.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I continue floating away from the ship, then radio Salt. "Dude, little help here. Kinda... kinda drifting off into eternity here..."

 

[Saltarius]

I activate the Fucking Huge Magnet and pull Trilby in.

"Y'know, the part of your skin that's affected by cancer is actually internal[./i]. That's why you don't just pour the rat poison all over yourself."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Thanks, Salt."
I chainsaw through the hull, then climb into the Mall again. "Tell me where the pirate is, so I can make him not-as-OP."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Do you see any stars nearby? No?"
He begins throwing explosive fireballs everywhere.

 

[Saltarius]

"Cancer can go undete-Woah! Shit! My Cancer-o-Meter is going off the charts when it detects you at THE TOY STORE BY THE SUB BASEMENT ENTRANCE."