Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Sigma Castell]

Suddenly, a screaming Sigma chrashes a Boeing 747 filled with Nitroglycerine into the ground, immolating everyone in an enormous fireball. Dammit Sig, take those flying lessons already. I gave you the coupons months ago.

-----------------------------
MEANWHILE, IN SIGMAS HEAD:

"ShitshitshitshitshitballswhattheshiiiIIITTT-"
I am incinerated.
And I respawn.
"Well hai guys."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I spawnfrag Sigma out of spite.
"STOP DOING THAT! YOU WERE LITERALLY TEN METRES AWAY!"

 

[Saltarius]

"I'm guessing I respawned after Sig did something stupid."

 

[Sigma Castell]

I grow a long whispy beard, turn bald, and my eyes suddenly become slightly asian.
"Brother...you may as well ask a river to stop running, or a flame not to burn. To deny the nature of another, it's most basic instinct, takes away what they truly are..."
I become Sigma-like again.
"But seriously, I can't help it. It's like you trying to stop martinis appearing in glasses everytime you touch them."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"I can stop it. Look."
I hold out a cocktail glass. Nothing happens.

 

[Sigma Castell]

"Well fine. If you can't handle the way I re-enter after a long abscence, I guess I just won't be coming back anymore."
I walk into a fridge and slam the door shut behind me.

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BACK ON EARTH:

I walk out of the fridge in my house. It's a beautiful day in the english country side. The sun is just begining to set, tendrils of pink and orange lighting up the horizen. Birds chirp their evening songs to the world, and the rolling hills and valleys make a wonderful view.
I make myself a smoothie, and throw myself onto the large sofa in my living room. Stretching out my legs, I breath a sigh of contentment.
"It's good to be home."

 

[Saltarius]

"Sigma, don't deny your stupidity."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I open the fridge door and find Sigma looking at a picture of the sunny English countryside.
"Photoshopped."
I shut the fridge and push it down a moving escalator.

 

[Sigma Castell]

Trilby does not do that, because he is on an infinite Mall, in space, wheras I am on Earth, several billion light-years away.
I watch Adventure Time whilst eating some toast.

 

[Captain Anon]

appears next to sigma "HA you missed you" and punches into a store and *click* sets it on fire with sigma still inside.

 

[Sigma Castell]

The paper mache Sigma burns quite quickly.

 

[Paddy the Second]

I send a tulpa to stand next to Sigma. "Sup bro?"

 

[Saltarius]

"Whatever. No point in chasing him. If he comes back, he comes back."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"He'll come back in a ludicrous vehicle accident, mark my words."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"See the thing is, we can't leave the mall. So he's here somewhere." I open a shop door, filled with home furnishings. I find Sigma inside.
"Dude. We're not able to go home yet. Tough luck, but I miss it too."

 

[Saltarius]

"Remember the last time someone tried to chase someone who left? Didn't end well."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Does it really matter? We got dick all else to do."

 

[Saltarius]

"I'm sure she's got a quest in store for us."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"She? Who's she?"

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Guys, he's literally in this store. Problem solved."