Mall Fight!

[Malevolent Stranger]

"Fuck the sisters.." He died, respawning in the room again. He then puts on Poker Face, by Lady Gaga, clearly able to go on all day.

He then slams a button labeled 'stink'. The button releases a sulfuric odor into the mall, in adition to the chickens.

 

[Nukey]

i see the chickens running around the bar.

"this is madness" one drunkard say's

"this is SPARTAAAAA!!!!" i shout out.

the drunkards now impressed with my timing act as my minions they swarm the mall to kill my foe's, i continue to drink.

 

[XIII's Number XIV]

I laughed at Malevolent's pitiful attempt to stop me with music.

"You're gonna have to do better than that!" I yell at the door, then procceded to try and roundhouse kick it, which ends in failure and pain--and bone breakage.

I grab one of Ren's med packs and heal, while trying to cover my nose of the putrid scent.

 

[Nukey]

my drunkard army marchs down the mall towards the fallout style door, they begin to unscrew the door from the hinges. i follow behind being held up two drunks singing.

"way hay and up she rises, way hay and up she rises, way hay and up she rises, early in the morning!" i sing obviously drunk.

The door falls down and me and my army pass by XIII's Number XIV to kill Malevolent Stranger.

 

[TheSentinel]

Solid Snake sneaks into the mall, killing Excitednuke with his cardboard box of DOOM!

 

[Malevolent Stranger]

As that fails, a trapdoor opens beneath Number's feet, dropping him and breaking his bones.

Malevolent then puts on good music, putting on Life Burns, while releasing tear gas into the mall.

 

[Pm0n3y]

After awhile, i rise from my cover, now aware that shit has not hit the fan... not yet at least.

 

[Sam G]

While all this was happening, Azraellod and I were still continuing with our Star Wars-style battle. Of course, now we've been fighting for 3 days straight, and we decide to take a break.
"IN HELL!" I yell (whatever that means) and grab Azraellod and fling him over a banister, causing him to fall a considerable distance down to the first floor.
"Puh-puh-puh poker face, puh-puh poker face..." I sing lazily, then fall asleep.

 

[Claymorez]

With my ice cream senses tingeing I realise that the impossible has happened that THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM is dead, gone, finisimo, and so I pressed to get revenge by hunting the lot of em down. But, some time later, then I witness a miracle happen, I can see Sirbrightside, about 50 yards away hiding amongst some freezers, and a reborn CHOCOLATE icecream in his right hand, however when I run towards him I slip on some butter on the floor, alerting him to my presence. My slip sends me flying into him, sending us both past the now mildly surprised Jed and unfortunately along with us goes flying the Last Chocolate Icecream which lands at Jed's feet, which me and SirBrightside look at in complete shock, that it has somehow remained in tact! We both rise slowly and dramatically and prepare for a fight of epic proportions. Personally I materialise a Light spear (lightsaber in spear shape) and prepare for my revenge! (however being a gentlemen I allow him time to get a weapon first).

 

[Ren3004]

After awhile, i rise from my cover, now aware that shit has not hit the fan... not yet at least.

What part of Hannah Montana, Jonas Brothers, Lady GaGa and live chickens didn't you read?

Back on topic: Ah, I'm back at the supermarket. I see SirBryghtside and Claymorez preparing to fight, and Jed looking at THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM.

I run as fast as I can, tackle Jed out of the way, and grab THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM.

Clay and Sir sense a disturbance in the Force and turn around to face me.

 

[Azraellod]

I manage to catch hold of the steel railing with my electromagnet, and slowly lower myself to the ground, thus avoiding a fatality.

I then turn my attention towards a nearby fight that looks like a real mess. I take out my 3rd sickle and throw it, this time aiming it at claymorez, stabbing him in the side, then pulling it back with the electromagnet before going in for another strike.

 

[Ren3004]

Thanks to Azraellod's distraction, I manage to escape my pursuers with THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM. Running out of the store, I find a car in the corridor and jack it.


On my way to the hardware store, a police officer tells me to stop and asks for my license and registration.

 

[Claymorez]

I run after REN, as fast as my legs can take me, all thoughts of SirBrightside lost, all my attention focused on the retrieval of THE LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM. However after noting the hardware store up ahead I then decide this is stupid for me, a man with God powers and then transform my legs into augmented power legs with built in bionics to make me run faster, with a top speed of 80mph, unfortunately I too am stopped by the policeman for my licence and registration number for my augmented legs, which apparently count as a veichle, which was not only problematic because just then Ren is allowed to go but because I had manifested them using my God powers I didn't have a registration form for them, and realised that Azraellod's well aimed sickle had torn my driver's licence off my clothing in all the commotion!

 

[Ren3004]

When the police officer realizes I'm in a hurry, he decides to play hard... He tells me to walk in a straight line, touch the tip of my nose, do a somersault...

Anyway, I get bored, stab his carotid artery with the car keys and head to the hardware store.

OK, time for some tuning, Ren3004 style. 30 minutes later, my car comes out of the store, covered in metal plates and nails and with a blowtorch in place of the exhaust pipe.

 

[Claymorez]

Realising that the officer is dead after 20 minutes of what I preserved to be the silent treatment and good cop bad cop to the extreme, I resumed my inhumanly fast run towards the hardware store and Ren and the all important LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM!

 

[Ren3004]

TAKE THIS... I hit the gas pedal, and my car breaks through one of claymorez mechanical legs, leaving him crying on the floor.


With the LAST CHOCOLATE FUDGE ICE CREAM in the passenger seat next to me, I head towards my next destination.

 

[Sam G]

When suddenly, a black helicopter being piloted by me appears, flying out of the sunset! I climb down the rope ladder, pull out my staple gun, switch it to automatic and open fire on Ren's vehicle.

 

[Jedamethis]

I wonder why nobody noticed me wandering aimlessly around...

And then hitch a ride on Sam's helicopter and proceed to commandeer it

 

[XIII's Number XIV]

I find a conveniently placed med-pack and heal myself, then climb out of the hole and see everyone ripping around the mall in oddly placed vehicles.

Then Ren's car comes toward me, and I jump just in time to land on the roof.

I load my gun again and procceded to open fire on the helicopter.

 

[Jedamethis]

I throw Sam out the window in an attempt to block XIII's bullets
Which, amazingly, works