my mom HATES violent video games

[Yoshemo]

If your mom won't let you play, she'll never listen to you. Parents tend to think "I know better than my child just because I do" so good luck

Parents don't think that, they KNOW that.
Parents ALWAYS know better than the child. It's called life experience.

Im not saying parents aren't smarter. I mean parents will often claim to know everything the child thinks and give no more explanation over their rules other than "because I said so"

 

[Captain Pancake]

Ultimately, it's her decision. I have a similar problem with my dad and my xbox, but it just results in snide comments and disapproving remarks every time I mention it or he sees me playing it, and no actual retribution. Just try and compromise. You'll look back on this day and think, "My god, did I really fall out with my mom over that?

 

[silver wolf009]

im 14, and there have been no bad sideeffects from my violent videogames, just convince your mother your not stupid like alot of other people and you'll be fine.

 

[Zykon TheLich]

If it's any consolation I'd have no problem buying it for you if you were my kid. But you're not, so I guess you're stuck. Sorry.

 

[Rensenhito]

Tell her that allowing you to play MW2 isn't going to turn you into an axe murderer; in fact, NUMEROUS empirical psychological studies have shown that kids who play violent video games are less likely to commit violent acts in real life. It helps defuse potentially dangerous impulses in pretty much everybody. In fact, the Dalai Lama's right hand man actually RECOMMENDS playing video games (even violent ones) as a way to relieve day-to-day stress. Look it up. Educate her.

A few years ago my university actually had one of the leading researchers on the topic of media violence in for a speech that showed quite different results. While a solid link between violent behavior and violence in games has yet to be shown either direction, there have been many studies concluding that violent games cause differences in aggressive behavior. Furthermore, the catharsis argument that many gamers seem awfully keen on has yet to ever show up in an empirical study as a valid theory and has no support whatsoever.

That said, the simple fact is that the kid is 13 and his mother makes the rules. End of discussion.

Eh, well, I'm quoting a quote of a quote, more than likely. Whatever.
From personal experience, though, the kids I played Halo, Gears, and Call of Duty with in high school turned out to be perfectly docile, non-psychotic, well-adjusted people. In fact, one of my "friends" whose parents would ground him if they found out he was playing video games got arrested recently for statutory rape. So that's my well of knowledge.
But I admit I was just mostly just referencing vague things I heard my psychology professor say, otherwise.

 

[RiversEnd]

I bent the rules a bit. I did not PLAY the violent games; I watched my father and grandfather play the violent games and inherited them on my 16th birthday.

My mother has the same viewpoint on games, namely that they are the cancer of the soul and that I should be hooked on conservative political talk radio. My advice is to wait until you're old enough to the point where you don't have to listen to your mother. Or, you know, play them at your buddies' houses.

 

[scnj]

Good to see a parent actually taking notice for once to be honest. Too many parents are completely disinterested in what their kids are playing these days.

 

[TheGreatCoolEnergy]

hi guys I have a problem, my mom completely hates violent video games especially if they are rated M. I'll explain when my mom got me a ps3 for christmas i got mw2 two days later (buying it with my own money i might add) and she was fine with that next day she shows up while im playing and requests to see the game so i proceed to show her, not even after watching for 5 seconds she says no, and tells me to take the game out and give it to her then she goes and returns the game. the next day I ask her why she did that and she says she doesn't want to talk about it and threatens to take the ps3 away entirely if i ask again. about two weeks later i spend some time thinking of a few things i could try to use to justify me being allowed to get the game (by this time she has allowed me to get uncharted 2 which has amazing single player and very good mp but it's just not mw2) so i go to her and we have a good 2 hour long conversation on why the game is violent. At the end of it she says she will look into it and research the game. I ask her about it 4 days later and shes shut tight about it again threatning to take away the ps3 and by this point i had already disproven her claims that the game would make me violent or desensitized so when i ask her why she just says you know why. so that night i compiled some videos off youtube one showing some clips one from a t rated fps, battlefield: bad company and then one from a mp match in mw2 and i didn't tell her which was which and she said she would buy me the one that was mw2 but not bad company after i told her what the next two clips where and picked two very similar clips to the first two the only difference now she knows which is which, not even 20 seconds into the mw2 clips (which at this point the only thing that has happend is the person walked around a bit shot a bit and missed then got killed) she says it's too horryfying to watch. I've also tried getting her with the bandwagon "it's ruining my social life because everyone has it and I don't" thing but it didn't work either. any suggestions guys?

Info on me:
13 years old, iq:134 extremely mature for my age, father has died, report card usually consists of all A's and possibly one to two B's maximum, not violent at all, very compassionate and understanding, follows rules, has never had more then one detention in a school year (usually from my cellphone being on in class or a teacher that just plain trying to find ways to get me in trouble.)

Alright, first and formost, I reccomend the use of punctuation, capitals, and paragraphs. I hate to be the grammar Nazi, but it makes it a lot easier to read.

Now that that's out of the way, I can get down to business. What to do?

Well a few pointers:
1-Bandwagon tactic: Just don't; I have never seen it work on a parent, and it deffinately won't work on your Mom who seems dead set already.
2-She seems to be one of those people who forms an opion without much proof. So I would try one or more of the following techniques:
a)-Do some hardcore reaserch. Somebody above me mentioned that the Dalai Lama's right hand man actualy recomends violent video games. Many other physcologist would agree. Just do a bit of reasurch and present it to her. Be sure to avoid the negative stuff.
b)-Find some other, local adult gamers who play it. In America, the average age of a gamer (as of 06' I believe) was 32. Finding somebody who plays shouldn't be too difficult.
c)-Find a religous figure (either online or off) who condones gaming. It will be difficult, but it will pay off
d)-If all that fails, you could try showing her some graphic GTA gameplay for comparrison. Kind of a desperate gamble, but you never know.
e)-Find a study that links gaming to good grades, lower stress levels, and less violence. It doesn't even have to be accurate. Hell you could make it yourself. It just has to look legit.

If all this fails, then have a good time with Uncharted.

 

[Dr. wonderful]

Naw you're way too young.

Screw it, I was eight when I was playing violent games.

 

[Irridium]

Join the club.

My parents didn't let my play any Grand Theft Auto game until I was 16.

They didn't hate the game, or thought it would turn me insane, they just thought I wouldn't be able to deal with the mature stuff in the game.

And looking back, they were right. I hated it when they wouldn't let me play, but they were right.

Just wait a few years. By then MW5 or whatever will be out and you should be able to get that.

 

[skyfire_freckles]

If your mom won't let you play, she'll never listen to you. Parents tend to think "I know better than my child just because I do" so good luck

Parents don't think that, they KNOW that.
Parents ALWAYS know better than the child. It's called life experience.

Im not saying parents aren't smarter. I mean parents will often claim to know everything the child thinks and give no more explanation over their rules other than "because I said so"

Parents are people, too. Why bother to try to explain to someone who doesn't want to hear it? No parent can give a rational explanation that a child will accept about something like what games they are allowed to play. They have to go by their gut, and then they have to stick to their decision even if they regret it. This is good parenting.

Did you ever consider that rather than being upset that he was playing an M rated game, she was pissed at the store for selling it to him? How can she rage at the store and still be justified in letting him play it?

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

Le snip
"Hoffific"? No period?
~snip~

Perhaps it is a reference to this man:

Spoiler

If it is, then that's brilliance.

 

[Pegghead]

Well as a fourteen year old I understand what you're trying to convey. I can't really relate as my parents have always been easy going about violent games and films (Most people here know my infamous DOOM story) but I'm sure your mother has her reasons. As the old saying goes mother knows best so just follow her judgement. But for goodness sake I go through enough modern warfare 2 praising playstation owning (And they put the console above everything else, yes even pc gaming to invoke the wrath of most) cliche subscribing cheeseheads every day so just don't act like some douchebag elitist here.

 

[Treblaine]

You're 13. You shouldn't be playing M-rated games. What she did was right as a parent.

Wait until you're 17, then you can play.

The little experiment he did was pretty mature IMO. And "M" stands for mature, not 17.

http://www.esrb.org/ratings/ratings_guide.jsp

ESRB says it does stand for 17 years old.

FYI the American rating system SUCKS BALLS, especially how a layman must visit a website to figure out what the cryptic ratings actually mean. I think the main reason for their uselessness is down to how the ESRB is not a government run body but effectively a trade body for self-regulation, they have very little to no legal powers and are not controlled by any democratically elected representatives.

Here in the UK we have clearly marked ratings where the laws are clear and universal (though not always agreeable, but I'm an adult now so yah boo sucks ya kids).

(U) = Universally suitable for all
(12) = not for people under 12
(15) = not for people under 15
(18) = not for people under 18

It couldn't be clearer and the even 3 year spacing between each rating bracket can accommodate for how some games/movies are more explicit than just a (12) (T for teen) rating but not explicit enough to earn an (18) (M for Mature) such as Uncharted 2.

ESRB is a load of crap, I think I'd prefer the UK's rating system. Anyways, I think representing one's maturity with a number is insulting personally.

Well one thing I think everyone should realise about BOTH rating systems is that they are NOT substitute parenting. These ratings are LAW for retailers and a GUIDE for parents... so say you're a parent with a 14 year old who wanted to play Uncharted Drake's Fortune, rated 15 in the UK it WOULD be insulting to just follow the label with no insight but I think most parents can make their own decisions.

All they have to do is do a youtube search for "Uncharted Drakes Fortune Gameplay" to get an idea of the content, and when they see that it is mostly Indiana Jones level of violence they will most likely exercise their powers as a parent over-rule the BBFC or ESRB.

 

[K_Dub]

While I think that you have a pretty good point, I can kinda understand where your mum is coming from. Although you may seem mature, everyone and anyone can be easily influenced. Maybe that's just what your mum is thinking. I dunno. I'd make my kid wait 'til he was about 15 I think before I let him play a M-Rated game. But that's just me.

 

[quiet_samurai]

Buy it anyeways and lie about it.

Taht's what I was doing when I was younger.

 

[Aesir23]

Wait until you're 17, then she has no say in what games you buy. As of now, you're only 13 and if your Mom says no, then I'm afraid there's no way around it since most stores won't sell M rated games to people under 17.

 

[Funkysandwich]

My Mother once told me not to play GTA San Andreas again because someone in the game swore rather loudly as she entered the room.

I kept on playing.

 

[Serge A. Storms]

I don't know about anyone else here, but I'm going to let my children to play violent video games as soon as they show they can handle two analog sticks. I don't need 'em getting confused and thinking there's some kind of relationship between shooting someone in a game and shooting someone IRL based on the ERSB rating system telling them that they can't reliably tell the difference between a handgun and an xbox controller. The media's desensitizing kids to violence, anyway, I say fuck it, why give conflicting messages on the relationship between real and fictional violence?