Poll: Female babysitter charged for having sex with 14-year old boy.

[Titan Buttons]

The girl should go to gaol, just because they were in a relationship before hand doesn't stop it from being wrong. Although I don't believe she should be charged with sexuall assult, since it was most likely consentual.

 

[grizzlyAssuager]

Taking those horrible myspace-angle photographs of yourself, having something with a 14 year old, and giving him alcohol while you are supposed to be babysitting him is clearly ill-judgement. At the least, it makes you a very shitty babysit.

But is it (date)rape? It all depends on this guys consent, right? I see people here say "she is hot, so there is not way it could be rape, since she is a hot girl and it's impossible to not want to have sex with her."

I think that kind of reasoning is a bit wrong: it still does not in account whether this kid consented or not, plus it makes the sad assumption that there is no way in hell a young male could NOT want to have sex with a hot girl. That's a bit.. rash. What if someone is not into girls? or not ready for sex? or just not attracted to this particular girl?

Anyway, all of this would probably be legal where I live if it were consensual. I don't think 14 year olds are incapable of consent by definition, just like boys don't want to have sex with "hot" girls by definition.

So it's possibly morally ok, she's still not a good babysit. Wouldn't hire her.
I don't think jail is beneficial for noone but the worst criminals, but at the age of 20, she should be more responsible than this. Some psychological help would be good. "rehab" sounds silly. I hope they had safe sex.

 

[Darth_pipsqueak]

I tried something like that once.. But that was my sisters babysitter and i was fifteen by the time.

 

[Versuvius]

Get, Medal, Hur. Etc. Yes i voted that.

 

[RagTagBand]

ITT : 200+ People who would be literally baying for blood if it were a male babysitter who got a 14 year old girl drunk and had sex with her, but because its an attractive girl they're all jealous of the 14 year old.

Or to put it simply, The vast majority of the respondents who think this is all perfectly fine are hypocritical, forever alone, sexist 12 year olds boys.

Not really a lot of them could just live in different cultures where it is perfectly acceptable.

Funny, I've never seen an escapist be that accepting whenever it is a MALE fucking someone underage. Which is my point

Read the OP's edit; apparently they were in a sexual relationship for quite some time already. That makes it a completely different story, means the sex was way was likely to be forced and more likely to be this kid's fantasy coming true.

Again, funny, I've never seen an escapist ask whether any female victims of underage sex were "Totally on board with having sex" with adult men.

Which is my overall point, The reaction to this story would be and has demonstrably been the complete opposite when it was an Older MAN and not an older WOMAN.

It's always been "UGH A 20 YEAR OLD WAS SLEEPING WITH A 14 YEAR OLD?! HE'S SICK. CANT HE GET GIRLS HIS OWN AGE? HE SHOULD BE LOCKED AWAY AND GET RAPED IN PRISON FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. IF I EVER MET HIM I'D SET HIM ON FIRE"

See the "Miss teacher bangs a boy" episode of southpark.

 

[Casual Shinji]

Dammit, where were all these hot horny babysitters when I was fourteen!!!

I know, double standards, but I can't help but think that right now; I'm just a big dumb male.

 

[Henkie36]

At the age of 14, you're old and wise enough to make your own calls and whether or not you want to have sex with your hot babysitter. And for that matter, why does a 14 year old boy need a babysitter? At that age, I was having fun with friends in the city til two in the morning.

More to the point, the laws of it being illegal to have sex with a minor are made for a case of rape. Rape is often very hard to prove, while sex is very easy to prove. These laws have been made so that if a minor were to get raped by an adult, the prosecutors can always press these charges and still get a reasonable conviction out of the case.

Bottom line, in they were both sober, and no force was involved, then he is a hero, albeit early, and she shouldn't go to jail or rehab.

 

[___________________]

Damn that lucky little sod. His parents should be throwing him a party and his dad should brag about it at work to the other dads whose 14 year old sons are still wanking to anime posters and playing Magic the Gathering in the hopes that a spell will teleport a whore into their rooms.

 

[Not George Carlin]

This thread makes me uncomfortable. I have nothing else to say.

 

[orangeban]

See, this kind of thing is bullshit. "Oh, she's attractive and female and young, it couldn't of possilby been rape, right?" (assuming that she did get him drunk in order to have sex with him) yeah, it is goddam rape. Just because she isn't a burly dude leaping out of a bush onto a 12 year old girl, doesn't mean it isn't rape.

That's all assuming that she got him drunk to have sex with him, we'll have to wait for the trial. (though even if they were in a relationship, he's still underage)

 

[Phisi]

She should go to jail because IT IS THE LAW and double standards are WRONG. That said I do think that consent law in wrong, well not really wrong, nothings perfect but it could be better in some aspects but you can't really have a law that dictates by maturity instead of age. If anything then the girl should not be allowed to consent as she should have the maturity to identify the risks. But I think in this case that the guy is kinda responsible for allowing it to happen (assuming they had been going out or he wanted it etc, if not then he is not to blame) I think there was a case where statutory rape charges were dropped because the teenage girl was the aggressor, can't find a link though

EDIT: found it, http://www.news.com.au/national/man-who-had-baby-with-11yo-stepdaughter-walks-free/story-e6frfkvr-1226041413319

 

[Aprilgold]

Well, drugging, then sexually assaulting, doesn't exactly matter those other years, because it could have been his / her idea and would take too long to track down. So, charge her with jail time.

 

[orangeban]

Consentual sex, no crime here as far as I can see. No, not saying it because she's hot and not saying it because the younger person is a male. I know girls who've had sex at that age with a guy who was 19, big whoop, they both wanted it, it's their choice.

The crime was statutory rape the boy was 14 and thus under the age of consent.

Thanks for telling me what I already know, it doesn't change the fact that I don't see it as a crime or something at all bad. If she got him drunk/incapacitated or otherwise raped him, it'd be wrong, yes, but I am of the opinion that a 14 year old human being has more than enough reason in them to make a decision of whether or not they wanna have sex.

It doesn?t really matter what your opinion is that slut still committed a crime and must be punished same as any other criminal.

Oh, you're one of those people >.>

What do you mean one of those people?

One of those people who thinks the law is there to be followed? Maybe? Dunno what else you should do with laws...

 

[Cowabungaa]

Again, funny, I've never seen an escapist ask whether any female victims of underage sex were "Totally on board with having sex" with adult men.

Which is my overall point, The reaction to this story would be and has demonstrably been the complete opposite when it was an Older MAN and not an older WOMAN.

It's always been "UGH A 20 YEAR OLD WAS SLEEPING WITH A 14 YEAR OLD?! HE'S SICK. CANT HE GET GIRLS HIS OWN AGE? HE SHOULD BE LOCKED AWAY AND GET RAPED IN PRISON FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. IF I EVER MET HIM I'D SET HIM ON FIRE"

See the "Miss teacher bangs a boy" episode of southpark.

Funny that you mention it, I actually knew a 14 year old girl who had sex with a 19 year old guy, consensually. If anything she talked him into it, oversexed as she is. And in that case my reaction was identical as in this case; kinda sad and pathetic, pretty stupid, but no-one got hurt.

Overal though, yes those double standards exist. They have an easily explained biological origin though; males of all species try to fuck as much and as fast as possible to distribute their genes. Females on the other hand are a lot more reserved, they wait, pick and choose the male that gets them the best offspring.

And this is obviously also present in the human subconcious, though in her case and in that girl I know, that instinct seems kinda...broken.

 

[Womplord]

I have no clue what is morally wrong with the 20 year old having sex with the 14 year old. It was consensual, damn it! Most 14 year old boys want to have sex, don't they? I seriously doubt he has any mental scars from this. It's a victimless crime.

 

[bakan]

They had a sexual relationship for several month, now the mother presses charges probably because she can't help but feel helpless because her little boy has sex and then with the older baby sitter.
It is nowhere stated that she raped him and forced him to have sex.
Now every second one wants to put her in jail - even if it were a boy and a girl and both are ok with it, why do you have to press charges, just because the law didn't adapt yet to lower the age of legitimate consent (children these days mature much faster)?

The law is good as long as it protects people from rape and stuff, but if both parties are ok with it there shouldn't be a problem at all.

 

[orangeban]

Again, funny, I've never seen an escapist ask whether any female victims of underage sex were "Totally on board with having sex" with adult men.

Which is my overall point, The reaction to this story would be and has demonstrably been the complete opposite when it was an Older MAN and not an older WOMAN.

It's always been "UGH A 20 YEAR OLD WAS SLEEPING WITH A 14 YEAR OLD?! HE'S SICK. CANT HE GET GIRLS HIS OWN AGE? HE SHOULD BE LOCKED AWAY AND GET RAPED IN PRISON FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. IF I EVER MET HIM I'D SET HIM ON FIRE"

See the "Miss teacher bangs a boy" episode of southpark.

Funny that you mention it, I actually knew a 14 year old girl who had sex with a 19 year old guy, consensually. If anything she talked him into it, oversexed as she is. And in that case my reaction was identical as in this case; kinda sad and pathetic, pretty stupid, but no-one got hurt.

Overal though, yes those double standards exist. They have an easily explained biological origin though; males of all species try to fuck as much and as fast as possible to distribute their genes. Females on the other hand are a lot more reserved, they wait, pick and choose the male that gets them the best offspring.

And this is obviously also present in the human subconcious, though in her case and in that girl I know, that instinct seems kinda...broken.

Oh, so (possible) rape is okay because... of sexism?

 

[Hagi]

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not approving of this, oh no most definitely not. I'm just saying that it was very stupid, but not nearly as stupid enough to legally treat that girl the same way as a freakin' rapist. Separate them, get that girl counceling, that sort of thing. I mean, she's barely out of her teens as well, jailtime and a criminal record would get her and that kid nowhere.

If he'd be a victim I'd respond to this completely different, but I bet that he thought he was living the dream. In that case I'm not seeing any reason for serious punishment, it just doesn't feel right. And that's what I care about, what's right, lawful or not.

I'm not saying she should go to jail. Not all crimes require jail-time. But that doesn't prevent this from being a crime. It is a crime.

And even though that boy is currently under the impression that he's "living the dream" this is still sexual child abuse and in later years it's possible for this boy to experience emotional issues.

I'd recommend reading up on Childhood sexual abuse [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Childhood_sexual_abuse], and other sources. Even if the participant was 'willing' at the time there are still many cases in which such things come back to haunt them at a later age. It's only made more difficult to deal with due to the conflicting emotions the child experienced at that time, he did 'want' it.

It's very possible for this child to deeply regret this at a later age and feel large amounts of guilt, depression and anxiety in later relationships. It's possible he'll push his negative emotions away as the rest of the world is constantly treating it as "living the dream" and regards any negative emotion he's associated with it as whiny.

Or maybe he'll be able to deal with this and process it in a mature and adult manner, that's also very possible. But remember, he's only 14. Can you seriously guarantee that this will not come back to him in any way or form and that he hasn't suffered anything he wasn't ready to deal with?

This adult woman (which the babysitter is) should know that it's wrong to have sex with minors and she couldn't know that it was certain that this child would experience absolutely no emotional issues with it at a later date. Therefore, in my opinion, what she did was very very wrong and she should be judged in court for it.

 

[Booze Zombie]

This, too. Needing a babysitter at 14 seems rather strange.

One could come up with any number of amazing theories as to why, from a neglectful parent to the one about the sitter being hired for the purpose of desensitising the boy to pretty women.

 

[UberNoodle]

ummm, why is a 14 year old being babysitted?

Why is my wife so often a nurse and I, a patient?

I mean ... I have no idea ... (^_^;

But seriously, it sounds like babysitting was just an excuse to spend time at the house, alone, with her apparent boyfriend, of 14.