Poll: Is Being Gay Cheating On Your Straight Partner?

[Powereaver]

Cheating isnt gender specific if you come home and ur partner is in bed with anyone.. man or woman its cheating imo.

 

[Inconnu24]

If my significant other were bisexual and still interested in fooling around with other women during our (at this point, lengthy and serious) relationship, my reaction would depend on her intent and honesty. As long as she fully discloses what she's doing beforehand, is smart with her actions, and isn't constantly chasing other women, I'll be absolutely fine with it.
Otherwise, if she tries to hide it or place it before our sex life, then I'm out.

 

[teebeeohh]

of course, for one the emotional pain inflicted on me is the same, on the other hand saying it's not is basically saying "homosexual relationships are not as real/good/whatever so this can't hurt because i am a big strong manly man"

 

[HalfTangible]

This is the result of a conversation I had with some friends. One of them made the suggestion that if he got married and then one day came home to find his wife cheating on him with another woman he would be fine with it, or at least better than if she was with a man. We had some more discussion mostly being 'Cheating is still cheating' or 'It's not the same'. I ask you Escapist - mainly males but females can answer as well - if you came home to find your partner in bed with another person of the same gender how would you react.

I like the way NCIS put it: It's less shocking for the partner because you know almost instantly what the other partner has that you don't.

Is it cheating?... Probably, yes. But whether or not the person is angry will be the deciding factor on whether they will treat it as such.

Especially since if it's a straight male the first thought in his head after 'oh my god, she cheated on me...' will be 'WHOOHOOO! THREESOME!'

nail on head.

This is pretty much the real answer, because the real problem with cheating isn't just the unfaithfulness its the self doubt that will be caused by it.

Though... if you didn't know your partner was Bi beforehand, it does raise questions of if you were that bad in the sack...

 

[Yopaz]

If your partner is having sex with someone else it's cheating.
If your partner is gay and thus don't want to have sex with you because of that then no.

Cheating on your partner is to have either a physical or emotional affair. To lose interest or change/realize sexuality is not cheating.

 

[Yopaz]

If your partner is having sex with someone else it's cheating.
If your partner is gay and thus don't want to have sex with you because of that then no.

Cheating on your partner is to have either a physical or emotional affair. To lose interest or change/realize sexuality is not cheating.

it is when you dont break up first.

So what you're saying that you should break up before you lose interest or change/realize true sexuality? I either think you didn't understand my post or I don't understand your post.

 

[michiehoward]

Yep. Your fucking someone else. Thats cheating. It certainly isn't a game of Parcheesi.

 

[Sion_Barzahd]

'Cheating is still cheating'

I was gonna quote a bunch of other people who pit this as well, since it doesn't need repeating again.

Way i see it, it's regardless of gender, they're still unfaithful.

 

[octafish]

If you aren't in an "open relationship" then yes it would be cheating. Cheating is cheating is cheating, if you think otherwise, well you are probably a cheater.

 

[AngloDoom]

My ex was bisexual, if she'd ever cheated on me I'd treat it exactly the same as if she'd cheated on me with a man. That is, rage-quit relationship.

That said, if she wanted to do something with another woman and asked, I'd be more likely to allow it on a case-by-case basis simply because it is something she would want that I could not provide her with. My ex and I were both quite liberal when it came to these sorts of things and were discussing the pro's and con's of a threesome, but that said finding someone I love in bed with anyone else, without me knowing before-hand, would be insulting, a betrayal, and should be treated as such.

EDIT - Wait, why is everyone thinking this is an easy road to a threesome? Who said the girl in question is bi, rather than lesbian? Wishful thinking, go!

 

[floppylobster]

It depends on if you define your relationship through love or sex doesn't it? If you only care about sex, and more specifically, penetration, then you've probably got no problem with it. If your relationship is built on trust, love and an emotional bond, then it's going to be a problem. That said, I'd still be okay with it. (mainly because I'm a total perv).

 

[DanielDeFig]

"Cheating", as the colloquial term goes, is a betrayal of trust and mutual respect for each other, that is vital in a healthy relationship. Gender or sexuality has nothing to do with it.

Having said that, I guess it would be slightly less bad, since a person who is already in a straight relationship, only to find out they're not straight, might generally be more confused and lost (emotionally, psychologically), as to what to do next. It still doesn't excuse the betrayal of another person, only slightly more understandable.

 

[Signa]

I want to say "no" because it seems like it's avoiding a technicality, but it really is cheating. When you are married to some one, it's a promise to always be with that person and only with that person. It's an emotional thing on top of a sexual act. By having sex with another person, you are giving yourself physically and (potentially) emotionally over to that other person. That's cheating.

Ninja edit: Oops, I see another loophole in my definition of marriage and cheating, but we are NOT going to go there. STAY AWAY!

 

[Gigano]

Well, you're kind of cheating them - since there's no chance of a relationship with actual romance - but you aren't really cheating on them unless you hook up with some other person for a bit of good ol' adultery (be it with a person of the same or the opposite gender).

Though if I had a wife, and she invited me to join in upon discovery, then I'd piously remember the gist of the good words of ol' Jesus: "Thy shall love adultery when the neighbour is hot enough".

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Adultery - voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than his or her lawful spouse.

I don't see any reference to the gender of the "someone other" there.

Whether someone is okay with it is another matter entirely; it's still cheating.

Cheating is still cheating, regardless of gender.


That said, I'd probably be too busy masturbating to be upset.

Pretty much what these people said. Gender is irrelevant, it's still cheating, it's still dishonest, and it's still hurtful. If they are in a straight relationship and discover that they are gay, then they should have the presence of mind to end their current relationship before pursuing any other. It would be far far less hurtful to their current partner, or rather I would think it would be.

 

[Liquid Paradox]

This question rivals "Is tomato a fruit or a vegetable?" in complete and absolute inconsequentiality. You can call it cheating. You can call it whatever you want. It's just gonna be an awkward breakup and that's about it.

Incidentally, this question is also like the Tomato example in that the answer is objective and absolute. A tomato doesn't magically stop being a fruit just because it doesn't taste sugary. On that note, are sweet peas fruits? What about sweet potatoes? are they fruit? Fruit is a fleshy protective barrier that covers and/or houses a plants seeds. There is no room for argument. The question might as well be "Is iron a vegetable or a mineral?"

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

This is the result of a conversation I had with some friends. One of them made the suggestion that if he got married and then one day came home to find his wife cheating on him with another woman he would be fine with it, or at least better than if she was with a man. We had some more discussion mostly being 'Cheating is still cheating' or 'It's not the same'. I ask you Escapist - mainly males but females can answer as well - if you came home to find your partner in bed with another person of the same gender how would you react.

If I came home and found my spouse in bed with someone of any sex, my first response would be "join in".

But my spouse and I have an open arrangement. One of our earliest decisions about our marriage was that we'd continue having sex with other people - together by preference, but separately at times too.

However, unless a couple has agreed upon an open arrangement before hand, then cheating is cheating either way.