Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Living_Brain]

Granted. It's the first bacon cheeseburger ever made. That exact one. All rotten and stuff.
I wish for sanity.

 

[A Satanic Panda]

Granted, you realize it's sane to commit suicide.

I wish for ownership of a Eurofighter.

 

[AwkwardTurtle]

Granted, but you acquired it through illegal means and are now under arrest.

I wish The Legend of Korra didn't have such terrible main characters.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

Granted but it has an even worse storyline with terrible secondary characters and poor flash-like animation.

I wish for a harmless mole as a pet.

 

[exessmirror]

-wrong tread-

 

[Living_Brain]

Granted, it ends completely.
I wish for a tree a km in diameter with people living inside.
Oh Noes! I took too long!
Granted, It's life is so boring it decides to kill itself 3 hours later.
I wish for a tree 1 km in diameter with people living inside.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted. Someone goes back in time so the series is canceled. The problem is solved.

I wish for magic beans.

 

[GrimGrimoire]

Granted.
They all jump away to Mexico.

I wish for more fedoras.

 

[Living_Brain]

what the heck Red???
Granted, You get so many they fill up the room your in, not allowing you to move.
I wish my wish wasn't skipped.

 

[GrimGrimoire]

Granted.
Your wish was ruined anyway.

I wish I had a timemachine.

 

[EscapeGoat_v1legacy]

Granted, it only travels backwards in time, and only to twelve seconds before.

I wish for a moustache.

 

[Roxas1359]

Granted, unfortunately though the only one you could grow was a Hitler-stache.
[sub]And thus I prove Godwin's Law.[/sub]
I wish for a fish.

 

[Living_Brain]

Granted, it eats you alive.
I wish for a clean swimming pool in my area.

 

[EscapeGoat_v1legacy]

Granted, everybody uses it constantly and leaves it terribly untidy.

I wish to be back in Yorkshire, instead of being in Birmingham for a family gathering.

 

[Moderated]

You are back in Yorkshire, in the years of the dinosaurs. You get eaten and die.
I wish that starting now, every wish that I make and mean comes true exactly the way I want it to.

 

[Living_Brain]

Granted. You wish for death.
I wish for a powerful laser.

 

[Roxas1359]

Granted, the moment you hit the trigger it'll explode though.
I wish for a new wallet.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

Granted, but it's made of material you're allergic too.

I wish I had more posts.

 

[Living_Brain]

Granted. You never leave the comp and die of dehydration.
I wish for the number 5.