Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Dalek Caan]

Granted, she plays so loud your ear drums burst. Never again will you hear.

I wish the voices in my head would shut up......I'm telling them!

 

[KOMega]

Granted, your mind can no longer perceive voices. You can still hear, but all voices everywhere are silent to you.

I wish I had more skills.

 

[username sucks]

Granted. You now have the skill to read the mind of any person within 0.0000001 millimeters from the center of your brain. It's one more skill than you had before.

I wish my lawn would mow itself.

 

[Teoes]

Granted, but it won't stop and now your grass is ruined.

I wish I could fly right up to the sky.

 

[EeveeElectro]

Granted, but you don't stop, hit space and explode.

I wish for a new house!

 

[username sucks]

Granted, have this Barbie dollhouse.

I wish I could pause time.

 

[Teoes]

Granted, but you can't now unpause it. Sucks to be you.

I wish my ear wasn't suddenly and inexplicably blocked.

 

[username sucks]

Granted. Now that it is removed from your head, there is nothing blocking it on any side.

I wish for delicious, fresh, non-poisoned, safe-to-eat bacon.

 

[Yuno Gasai]

Granted, but your overindulgence causes the thought of bacon to make you feel sick to your stomach.

I wish I had a second monitor which actually worked.

 

[LordofHeart]

Granted, you now have a second monitor that works. To bad it only works for a few moments before it breaks as well.

I wish that I was the Kwisatz Haderach.

 

[kailus13]

Granted, you get eaten by a sand worm.

I wish to control the spice.

 

[LordofHeart]

Granted, to bad the the Sand Worms have died out and there is no more Spice.

I wish, I wish that you (i.e. the next person to read this and post) were a fish, out of water, without some form of breathing apparatus, meaning you're clearly suppose to be in the water.

 

[username sucks]

Granted, you can control the spice when you are a ghost. But first you must die with some uncompleted goal or something so you can be a ghost.

I wish I could live in my dreams forever.

 

[LordofHeart]

Granted, you can live in your dreams forever. Too bad all you have now are nightmares.

And now to re-wish this as I ninja'd the guy above me:

I wish, I wish that you (i.e. the next person to read this and post) were a fish, out of water, without some form of breathing apparatus, meaning you're clearly suppose to be in the water.

 

[username sucks]

Woah, Woah, how did you do that? I thought I checked after I posted...
Anyway, I am now a suffocating fish out of water, but I also caused a massive flood that will cover both of us shortly. Now who's the one who can't breath?!?!?!

I wish that I had ninja repellant...

 

[Teoes]

Granted, but you're in shark-infested water and don't have the shark repellent.

I wish that I could un-spam things I have unknowingly spammed.

 

[LordofHeart]

Woah, Woah, how did you do that? I thought I checked after I posted...
Anyway, I am now a suffocating fish out of water, but I also caused a massive flood that will cover both of us shortly. Now who's the one who can't breath?!?!?!

I am not sure how I did it, only that I did it. XD And I'm not, I clearly have my breathing apparatus! .... And a submarine! ... Although, I'm also dead, so hah! XDD

Now, dude/dudette above me, thine wish has been granted, BUT you are now compelled to spam everything unknowingly, you are also compelled to un-spam them the moment you notice you spammed them.

I wish I had Gambit's Mutant Powers.

 

[Teoes]

Granted, but you accidentally apply the energy to your Bo staff, crack yourself around the back of your head with it and look where that's left you.

I wish I had a pepperoni and black pudding pizza.

 

[Teoes]

Granted, but you break your back carrying it over the threshold.

I wish I could nap this afternoon and wake up at 5pm.