The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)

[Vrex360]

On board the ship targetting our heros, a lone Sangheili warrior named Vrex rose to his feet, he knew what he was doing would be condemned as heresy but regardless he mentally prepared himself. He no longer believed it was heresy to abandon ship, he had failed his mission anyway and this strange ship being targetted was still ready for boarding action. He summed up his might and operated the OMEGAAGEMO device which quickly teleported him on board the other ship. He walked in on an awkward scene in which someone was yelling something and another guy (human possibly) was making love to an Asari woman and a strange rotting creature. Suddenly they noticed him and Vrex turned to face them, he looked towards the one who appeared to be the captain.
"I must aide you in your survival,'' he said. "I failed my last mission and this is my chance to redeem myself, if you would have me I wish to serve as your warrior."
The one getting it on with two women looked up:
"I am Lastbayking." He said. "Who are you?"
"I...'' said the Sangheili. "Am Vrex. And you have a much greater foe to face than mere fanboys. I present to you... THE JOOBNOOK, a troll of such great and infinite power, it was my mission to destroy him but I need your help to do so."
"Okay,'' said Lastbayking. "You're in, just don't distract me from my banging."
"May I join?" Inquired Vrex.
Lastbayking stared for a moment.
"... sure why not?" he said.

AND THEN OUT OF NOWHERE CAME A BELLOWING ROAR IN CAPSLOCK, THE JOOBNOOK HAD ARRIVED.

AND NOW BACK TO JAPAN

 

[maddawg IAJI]

"Alright men! FOLLOW ME!" said Maddawg leading the villans in one of the mechs.

10 minutes later

"Where the are we? Asked Grimm looking around in confusion.

"Where in Pennslyvania!" Said Maddawg exiting the mech and looking down on a nearby city from a hill.

"How did we get here so fast!? This completely defies all forms of logic!" Yelled Sho as he looked around.

"It dosen't matter. Now I'm gonna have the mechs walk around the city on auto-pilot. Were gonna go down there and scope out the city." Said Maddawg

"Why not just stomp in with the mechs?"

"Because the last thing we need right now is the entire U.S army after us. We need to lay low until we find the heroes."

"Righhtttt so I guess laying low would mean just waltzing into a nearby Urban area with an Alien carrying a chainsaw, A cat with a Master Chief Helmet, and a guy who looks like his mom dressed him!" Said Grim

"Hey!" Said Sho staring down at his clothes.

"You make a good point Grim. We will need a change of clothes if we mean to blend in with the current population."

30 minutes of picking out disguises later.

"Why you picked a biker outfit I will never understand MK." Said Maddawg as he and the others walked on a nearby rooftop.

"Hey at least I didn't dress up as a green beret!"

"Why am I the only one who looks normal?" Said Sho as he straightened the red tie to go with his white collar shirt. "And Grimm, any reason why you wore a bra and stuffed it with grapefruits?"

"It makes me feel pretty!" Said Grim modeling the Red jacket with jeans.

"Whatever. Let's just find a way off of this ro-OOH GUNS!" Said Sho running over and picking up an Smg.

"Why would people leave perfectly good weapons and ammo lieing around like this?"

"ATTENTION ANYONE WHO CAN HEAR THIS! PROCEED TO MERCY HOSPITAL FOR EVACUTATION!"Said a flying helicopter as it passed overhead.

"Wonder what that was all about." Said Mk hugging a shotgun.

"Who knows I'm sure it will all be explained in a very detailed paragraph explaining our situation and what's going on."

Nope....And 5 minutes later on the street corner.

"ZOMBIES MADDAWG! YOU PICKED A FUCKING CITY WITH ZOMBIES!" Yelled Grim as they cleared a nearby street corner.

"Don't blame me! I'm not the one who shot Mk in the back like twenty times."

"Surprisingly enough, He shot me in the left foot,but I'm limping with my right."

"Who cares. Look there's the subway, we can get to the hostpital by following the tracks."

In the next level!!!!!

The group walks down the train tracks, along the way they see dead bodies and crashed train cars. They then begin to hear crying.

"What is that?" Said Sho looking around for the source .

"Hey guys. Is this chick dead or alive?" Said Mk poking at the the crying girl in the corner.

The girl began growling and suddenly stood up screaming.

"Uhhhhh Grim did it!" Yelled Mk pointing to Grim.

"WHAT!" said Grimm.Suddenly, the girl sprinted at him and tore him to peices.

In the next level!!!!!

"So Grimm's dead huh?" Asked Maddawg clearing an area of zombies.

"Ya. That chick went crazy on him. She ate his freakin splean for christ's sake!" Said Sho.

"Ya, I'm gonna miss that son of a- HOLY SHIT I SHOT THE GAS STATION!" Said Maddawg as the nearby gas station blew up and sent debris everywhere.

"Crap get into a corner! The Hordes gonna be on us soon!"

10 minutes later..

"Maybe there aren't any zombies around." Said Maddawg climbing onto the nearby lift.

"I guess we just lucked out a bit." Said Sho pushing the button and the lift activated with a very quiet [sup]squeak[/sup] and soon a huge number of zombies ran out of nearby doors to attack them.

"OH COME ON!" said Master Kitty"

In the next level!!!!

"Come on Sho we need to get into the Elevator."

"Just a second I wanna check this room. HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT THING!"

"RAWRRRR"

"AHH SOMEONE HELP IT'S CRUSHING ME! NO GIVE ME BACK MY LEG! He-*thud*hey*thud don't hit me with it!!! Oh god my spine! It's breaking my spine *Bone breaking sounds* AGHHHHHH!"

Maddawg and Master kitty just stared down the hallway and looked at eachother before Maddawg quickly hit the button to go to the top floor.

IN THE FINAL LEVEL!!!!

"Alright. Radio me back when you're ready to go and I'll head out."

"Alrigh Maddawg we need to set up defenses. Look in that closet over there and see if you can find some Propane tanks or somthing." Said Mk to Maddawg

As Maddawg opened the door he was greeted by Sho and Grim as they stood in the closet together.

"Gee thanks for rescuing me." Said Sho pushing him back as he and Grim walked by.

"Oohhhh What does this do? Said Grim eyeing the radio.

"Okay I'll be there in ten minutes!"

"GRIM YOU IDIOT!"

After 30 minutes of fighting off zombies

"WHAT THE HELL TOOK YOU SO LONG!?"Said Maddawg as he and Sho climbed into the helicopter.

"Well I did leave when you told me to go, but I figured that I could get a coffee first." Said the pilot sipping from the Dunkin Donuts cup.

"Hey guys you forgot about me!" Said Grim as he stood on the roof while the Helicopter took off.

"Hey you're voice sounds familiar. Where you on TV at some point in you're life?" Asked Sho.

"Why yes I was" Said the pilot. " I use to do those Mastercard commericals.

Price of a Helicopter:30,000 dollars.

A full tank of gas:150 dollars

Rescueing survivors off of a building infested with zombies?: 50 bucks a peice. PAY UP!"

"Guy's the Tank is grabbing me! HEY HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING NO!!!!" Said Grim as the tank grabbed him and threw him at the helicopter.

"Getting blown up by a T.T.M (Tank Thrown Missile): Priceless." Said the pilot as he lost control of the Helicopter upon Grim's impact.

 

[Lastbayking]

MEANWHILE IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"WTF." I think that sums it up quiet nicely.
"Sir we are being shot at."
"Fire the maser."
"Charing our LAZER."
"LETS FIRE MUH LAZER." The lazer fired at it's enemies. Nothing happened.

Meanwhile on the ships of the people shooting the king of the bay...

"What just happened?"
"Nothing at all..."
Then out of no where Dr.Octagon jumps out of nowhere. "LAZER DR.OCTAPUS BLARGH!!!" Destory many innocent civilians.

 

[Pm0n3y]

Phil and Rag sat on the ground, fuming as they watch Dark Link get all the attention.

"Dis' is a bun' o' bullshit. We ge's no respect." Rag says, crossing his arms. Phil nods in agreement.

"Yeah, i hear ya. I mean, we're angels! Saviors of this world, and yet DL gets all the attention!" Phil says

"Yea... wai' a min', what's dat in yo' hand?" Rag asks

"Umm... wat you talkin bout willis?" Phil says, hiding his hand

Rag snatches what Phil was holding. It was a Dark Link shirt.

"Wha?! now e' has memorabilia? Dis is a bun' a bull!" Rag yells

"You gotta admit, it does looks cool." Phil says, Rag agreeing with him.

 

[Sam G]

"Dark Link, Dark Link,
You're so sexy!
You're so sexy
You... Um... Sexy!" Death and Livingness cheered.
"Ha'nt y' g'ys g't 'n' s'lf-r'sp'ct?" Rag asked the boys.
"What? We're woefully inadequate as heroes, so seeking a new hobby, i.e. Dark Link fanboys, seemed like a good idea!" Death replied.
"Are the cheerleading uniforms really necessary, though?" Phil asked.
"No, but they're ever so comfortable!" Livingness said, striking an anime-style pose.

 

[Sam G]

"DEATH!!!" Livingness yelled, springing towards his cousin and whipping him in the head with his shotgun. "You're the reason I'm such a one-dimensional character! If I kill you, I'll no longer be "Death the Kid's cousin", I'll be "the one who killed a tiny little man disguised as a ventriloquist's dummy"!"
"Dude, Livingness, get off me, man! I need to go kill Ram for being a much more plot-prominent character than me!" Death kicked Livingness in the face and threw a rock at Ram. "Ow! Jerk!" Ram said, pulling Rag's shoe off and throwing it at Death.

 

[ajb924]

"Well,we did get blown out of the air... But there are two bright sides!" Sho said
"And they would be?" MK asked
"One: We landed away from the zombie town, and two: The damn mastercard guy is dead!"
"How am I alive?" Grimm mumbled
"Oh, your saying out of everything, thats the worst thing to happen to you?" Maddawg asked
"....Fine.... You win..." Grimm said
"I have an idea to stop the heroes! And it involves making us heroes in the public american eye!" Sho said
"This better be good..." MK said
"We call the white house and say that there are a group of renegade terrorists planning to kill the president. We give them the heroes description and all of national security goes after them. Meanwhile, we sneak into the white house, kill the president, make it look like suicide, and then take over the country!" Sho said
"That's kind of... Cheating..." MK said
"Yea, the heroes didn't destroy us with the Logician remember? We can't do something THAT dirty..." Maddawg said
"Fine.... Do any of you have a better idea then?" Sho asked
"What if we trianed the zombies to be our warriors and unleashed them on the heroes?" Grimm said
"That's stupid." MK said plainly "What we need to do is become the zombie leader and make them attack the heroes!"
"But... I JUST said that..." Grim said
"Prove it *****!" MK responded

 

[Ramthundar]

Rag continued his choke hold on Ram, but a hit to his kneecaps made him momentarily drop Ram, who immediately jumped on top of him and began beating him with his horns.
"Rammy poo! Stop! Why are you being so mean!" Samii cried, trying to pull Ram off.

"Let go of me! Let go of me, you cow!" Ram cried, struggling against Samii. He suddenly stopped, as he sensed everyone immediately quieting down. Ram slowly turned his neck, as he saw Samii glare at him with flaming eyes.

WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!?!

"Uhh...." Ram squeaked, all the anger now replaced by intense terror.

Twenty minutes later
"Okay, I understand beating Ram, but why did you have to beat us!" Phil demanded, rubbing his soar buttocks.
"You boys were being bad. I punish bad boys." Samii said, blowing on her now smoking Whoopin Stick.
"GEAHH" Ram whimpered, horns bent and fur torn out.

 

[Sam G]

"Mini-skirt power!!!" yelled Livingness, jumping into the air and flying at Grimm, kicking him several times in the face before landing. Death did a backflip and leapt towards Grimm and kicked him in the chest with both feet, sending him crashing into the side of a barn. The cross-dressing cousins pulled their weapons out of god-knows-where and charged towards their selected opponent, commencing a round of ass-kicking, anime transvestite style.

 

[Ramthundar]

"Is okay" mumbled Ram, horns caught in Maddawg's mech's legs, both of them under a large rock.

"So, I'm guessing your here to help us defeat the villains by how your beating up a black dragon?" Ram asked with a hopeful tone.

"Well, no actually. I'm preventing this dragon from attacking my master, who wants to destroy the world on his terms."

"And the term is African-Draconian, you damn cracker!" Dark cried, whipping Electro while he was distracted. His dark tendrils made a deep cut in Electro'd body, making the electric dragon roar.