The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)

[maddawg IAJI]

"You know what I don't think he's coming." Said Maddawg after waiting a few mintes.

"How do yo know." Said Mk who was still sitting down.

"The kid has a freaking abstinince ring on. It's like his kryptonite.As for the portal plan you forgot about the Logician."

"The who" said Cats.

"The Logician he justs think and then it comes true he'll just think of a way out."

"Sounds overpowered...I should take his bases."

"Whatever we'll just attack them while there drunk!" Said Maddawg calling in an army of Reavers.

"Wait you had those guys with you the whole time and you made us walk." Said Sho

"Yeah..In all honesty you're getting fat."

A quick riding loading screen later Maddawg busted down the door to the Bar and charged in with the Villans behind them. Only to find all the heroes unconsious.

"What the hell! We finnally come to have an open confrontation and they go ahead and take a nap." Said Maddawg

"Maybe there drunk." Said Mk poking Splazor with his Spartan Laser.

"No they are not drunk" Said a Mysterious Russian voice. "They have been attacked by the motherland!"

A half hour later.

"Okay so you mean to tell me that you guys came here to claim this city for Communism and becuase you had a grudge against these guys becuase they tied youre shoelaces together and tripped you. But before you knew it they killed all of you're men. So in a act of self defense you gave a SlimJim to you're spicy side who went ballistic and tried to kill them. But since there essential to the story they were only knocked out." Said Cats.

"Yeah." Said Reznov the angry Communist.

"Then where is you're spicy side?" Asked Grimm.

"Ozzy saw it that he died." Said Reznov. Looking in the corner they saw the wreckage of the crazy train.

"OI I'M OUT OF REHAB!'

 

[Solytus]

~In an unnamed tavern~
Green meekly observed as the barkeep and a few henchmen attempted to manhandle a clearly drunk ram, and after a few moments, he decided he had had enough.

Casting a mystical spell, Green cast off his chibi form, and amidst a cloud of blue, he rose as a full-sized ninja, still preposterously colored.

Unsheathing his twin katana, he valiantly proclaimed, "Thous shalt not manhandle that Ram! Manhandling is for men! Release that ram at once!"

His attempts at heroic speech were met with laughter and continued aggression against the seemingly defenseless ram.

"Then so be it," muttered Green, as he rushed the congregation of tavern employees.

 

[The_Chief]

As Splazor dog went towards the tavert he heard the ruckus and rushed in. he saw ram being attacked and a Neon ninja trying to help him. he figured the Ninja meant well but wouldnt be able to do anything so he ran in and shot on of the employees unknowingly with an ice lazor. he was confused for a second as the ninja hit the frozen target and proceeded to save ram.
"wha wassh tha?" Ram asked, slurring his words, questioning Splazor's newly found power.
"uhhh i guess im just that cool?" Splazor said, trying to make it seem like he meant to do that.
"and who might this extremely bright ninja be?"

 

[Solytus]

When the smoke cleared, Ram looked around, and found himself in what looked to be some sort of industrial facility, and despite his surprise, his inebriation, only allowed him to slur out,

"Wheere arrr dish?

Making a vague estimation as to the nature of Ram's inquiry, Green responded, "This is an abandoned Vegemite factory, it was the best I could think of, given the hasty nature of our departure."

Ram seemed to simply ignore Green's response, as he crumpled into a drunken heap of mammal on the floor.

With that, Green turned his attention to his other companions, and said, "Hello, my name is GreenE66, but you can just call me Green. I am the lemon-lime ninja, the champion of the honorable Sprite clan."

At that moment in time, the heroes shared a rare moment of unanimous agreement, and they all thought to themselves, "wtf?"

 

[RagnorakTres]

"Hey, LemLi! How ya been? Haven't seen you since Uni!" Ragnorak said as he stepped out of the shadows, Daitatsu across his back. "Jeez, is Ram drunk again? Christ, ever since Samii started nosing around..."

"Shut up! I'n't jealoush...*hic*...Shamii...*Cries*"

"So...why is he the leader again?"

"Because when he's sober, there isn't a finer military mind on the planet. The problem is getting him away from the bar." Ragnorak replied to Splazor's question.

"Okay then...Hey Rag, when'd you get the scythe? I knew you were a sucker for big weapons, but Christ!" said Green.

"Oh, I got it forty years ago or so. It was in the armory when Dad handed me the key. I've nearly finished collecting Baldr's weapons for my family, only missing Dotatsu and Fuutatsu. I actually think I know where they are, just need to go there and pick them up...Anyway, I see you got your certification. What've you been doing for the last century?"

"Oh, this and that, assassinations, bodyguarding, a little evidence planting, mostly, though, just been waiting for something interesting to happen."

Suddenly, the Vegemite factory shuddered, interrupting the heroes' small talk. The roof was ripped away by a giant ant and several helicopters appeared above it. They dropped people in business suits with guns. "Oh shit! Run guys! It's a group of para-legals! I didn't think they'd catch up so soon..." said Splazor.

"Splazor, WHAT DID YOU DO???"

"*hic*...ninja...madnessh...SHPARTA!!!" Ram charged drunkenly into the group of para-legals who were trying to serve them all with writs of complicity and shoot them at the same time to keep them still.

 

[maddawg IAJI]

The villans stood in the bar as the heroes created random plot twists and add-ons. They just stood there as the heroes walked right on by them.

"Reznov....You do realize the Ussr has been gone for about 50 years right?"Said Maddawg.

"You are foolish my friend the Ussr has been broadcasting secret messages to me and my ham radio for years. See?" Said Raznov holding up a toaster.

"And if you were in WW2 and you were like 30 somthing wouldn't the 60 years up to this point make you..I don't know 90?" Said Maddawg.

"......" Responded Reznov just staring at Maddawg. "YOU ARE NOTHING BUT AMERICAN DOGS! I WILL ENJOY DESTROYING YOU!" Said Reznov taking out a machine gun.

Maddawg simply poked Reznov who then disseapeared into dust.

"Well then since Reznov is dead and there is obvioulsy no USSR to help us. I say we just invade and conquer Ireland ourselves." Suddenly Maddawg spied a little girl hiding behind a counter.

"Well hello there little one. You know what how would you like to be my aprentince. What is that in you're hand? IS THAT A SYRINGE! YOUNG LADY NO APPRENTICE OF MINE WILL ABUSE DRUGS!" Said Maddawg grabbing the Syringe and causing the girl to cry. To the call came a big daddy jumping down from the second level of the Bar.

"Well looks like we got fish head here. Don't worry that tin can must be the slowest thing on the pla-" Said Maddawg before interuppted by the Bigdaddy's headbutt. Maddawg went flying across the building smacking into the wall going at least 70 mph.

"Holy shit they killed Maddawg" Yelled Mk who watch in some kind of glee.

"Hey just becuase I was hit by a giant tin can goind at least 70 dosen't make me dead....Fattally wounded sure but not dead!"

 

[Solytus]

Green neatly summarized their situation with a hearty, "crap."

Most of the heroes were drunk off their tits, paralegals with high-powered assault rifles were charging their place of respite, and better yet, the heroes were unable to flee, as their beloved leader Ram was drunkenly charging the oncoming men of the law.

Green quietly cursed, and using an ancient ninja magic, mended his previously truncated sword.

Rag yelled, "Splazor, Green, hold them off while I got get Ram!" as he leapt into the crowd of paralegals.


Green and Splazor braced themselves.

 

[Solytus]

Despite their combined efforts and combat skills, the sheer numbers of paralegals were bearing down upon the valiant heroes, and all seemed lost.

Suddenly, Green boomed, "LOOK! A patent infringement!"

The entire horde of paralegals turned tail and ran in the direction Green pointed.

Rag, swiftly searching for Ram, said, "They won't be gone for long, lets find Ram and get the hell out of here."

Just as the cluster of heroes was about to leave, the floor began to rumble...

 

[Ramthundar]

Timezone Zero blasted the beserker with his nuclear rifle, knocking it on it's side.

"Quick!" bellowed the Austrian Novelty Theory, "Get In Dah Choppah!"
"What are you talking about, there's no damn helicopter-oh.." Huey started to say, but stopped with a sigh as he saw the lower half of Timezone turn into a helicopter. Helicopter blades sprung from his army-cut hair.

"What? Eww, that means we're going in..him..."
"Orgazmo is not afraid to go in anyone!" the caped pleasurer cried, jumping in the man-choppah.
"Hehehe...he's a Mere-copter...heheheh." Ram giggled in his intoxicated state, who was carried in the choppah by Green.
"....Why did I join this group again?" Huey asked, but his only reply were the others going in the choppah.
"....Fine..." Huey sighed, being the last to jump in. As soon as he was in, the choppah-blades began to spin and soon the heroes were flying off in the distance.

Off in the Distance

"Okay, so now what?" Samii asked, hanging on to what she was furiously hopping was a metal rod in the choppah.

"We can go to my Sprite Clan hide-out until we've got a plan." Green said, and climbed to the the head part of the choppa to give Timezone directions.

"Heheh, he's climbing on his head, hehe...ach, I'm getting tired of this joke. THOR'S TOUCH!"
Ram shook himself off, all signs of intoxication now gone.
"Alright, so now what's our problem?"

 

[ajb924]

"Damn they've escaped!" Maddawg cried
"Quickly! We must give them a chase! To the Hidden Peter!" Sho cried
"Yea.... Why not take a reaver?" MK questioned
"Well because.... Hwy wait, i poisoned all of them when i first switched sides... How did you get more?" Sho asked
"Well there was one left!" Maddawg explained
"But-" Sho began but maddawg cut him off saying
"They're asexual...."
"Ah, i see.... Well after this pointless little talk we've lost all chances of catching up... Let's go back to base." Sho muttered displeased with the lack of killing

Spoiler: To all....

I will be going to comicon and this is likely to be my last post for a while, i really don't want to come back with a dead charecter so DON'T FUCKING KILL ME!
Later everyone!

 

[Dorian]

Spoiler: OOC

Hello! I'll just join in here.

Seeing as I'm too lazy to bother reading, I'll let YOU decide where I pop in!

The scientist finished hooking up the complicated wires to the machinery. "At last! My portal machine will work! My life's dream, realized!!!"

He flipped the switch. Coils of electricity jetted off to either side, and a loud humming radiated from it. A green swirl popped into existence inside of the arch. It grew until the machinery closed the edge. It was cloudy. The scientist took off his safety goggles and walked up to it. He poked his finger through it, then walked on in. He fell through a long tunnel, full of voices that told him various things. Most nonsense, some genius.

The ground smacked into him, the wind being driven out of his chest. He thought there were people nearby.

 

[Ramthundar]

"HOLY SHIT! A guy just dropped into the choppa!" Ram cried, looking at the slightly stunned man.
"So many...beautiful ideas...must...write them down..." the man started, reaching for something to write with. But unfortunately, the only thing he touched was Samii's tail.
"PERVERT! COWAKAZI!"
"GAHHH! THE CHOPPA IS GOING DOWN!" Timezone Zero screamed, his choppa torso being to heavy to sustain lift.

 

[Dorian]

The scientist reached into his lab coat and took out his notebook and pen. "The ideas must be preserved! They must..... Be real....."

He suddenly came to. People were standing around, screaming in a helicopter headed downward.

"WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?!?!?!?"