The Guy above me is a troll because...

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for thinking life is like pizza, when really it's more like a box of rabid weasels.

 

[Magnatek]

...for not thinking that the weasels are starved and crazy, as well as rabid.
[small]Either way, I take the box and open the lid, and the weasels start to latch on to my face.[/small]

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for discerning the reason as to why the weasels are so pissed.

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for doing research on the people who are still alive.

 

[Sassafrass]

...for not knowing research on living people is the way forward.

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not accepting the truth.

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for being filled with Babylonian passion.

[sub]And apparently changing his avatar back to its former goat-eating-a-sandwich-ness.[/sub]

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for thinking I have desires.

[sub]That part of my brain has been removed.[/sub]

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for customizing things and congratulating people and hogging all the air.

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not following through on his feelings towards his ex.

 

[Last of the Chinchillas]

...for not noticing the shovel and trash bags I've conveniently placed in the trunk of his car.

 

[Sassafrass]

..for killing the woman and not giving me her bones.

[sup]I wanted her bones...[/sup]