Times you have put jerks in their place

[xplay3r]

i was in 7th grade, this short(dont really care about hight but you'll see why i pointed it out) weird loud mouthed kid who had an ego bigger than himself, who was always a comtepete A-hole, was hanging around the water fountian with about 2 or 3 of his friends, me and two other friends walked up, and i took a drink. now im 6'3 i was about 6 ft and overweight (not obese but i had a gut) in seventh grade, and he was about 5 ft maybe less.
He starts calling me fat, and making jokes about my weight.
I look at him like he's an idiot and say "dude, shut up before I step on you and squash you like the bug that you are" everyone (including his friends) laugh, and i walk away...he left me alone for the rest of the year and hald i was at the school for.

 

[rabidmidget]

/sigh I'm done arguing. あなたは馬鹿です

No... You are the fool.

Oh Fuckin' snap!

No way did you do that. Fuck.

I have to ask was that a google translate job or do you know Japanese?

Wait a minute... Are you the same guy?

I know a little, and that sentence is strikingly familiar since I've written it several times.

Don't know where you are going with that same guy comment?

Fair enough, I need to learn some offensive sentences in another language. I learnt one when I was 12 in french. God I was so cool back then!

How about "Du bist ein doof kopf"?

That is one of the few German sentences I remember

 

[Paksenarrion]

Some random guy (a friend of a friend, apparently) punched me in the crotch just because my legs were splayed open as I was leaning in a couch, so I kicked him in the balls...HARD.

If you're going to FALCON PUNCH someone, expect retribution.

 

[Venatio]

i was in 7th grade, this short(dont really care about hight but you'll see why i pointed it out) weird loud mouthed kid who had an ego bigger than himself, who was always a comtepete A-hole, was hanging around the water fountian with about 2 or 3 of his friends, me and two other friends walked up, and i took a drink. now im 6'3 i was about 6 ft and overweight (not obese but i had a gut) in seventh grade, and he was about 5 ft maybe less.
He starts calling me fat, and making jokes about my weight.
I look at him like he's an idiot and say "dude, shut up before I step on you and squash you like the bug that you are" everyone (including his friends) laugh, and i walk away...he left me alone for the rest of the year and hald i was at the school for.

That reminds me of the time some kid told me that "he did my mom" I turned around to him and said "thats impossible, my mom doesn't do gay people" the end result being that he got laughed at by his friends.

I would like to make it clear that I have only the utmost respect for the Gay Community and have no prejudice against said individuals whatsoever.

 

[mcgroobber]

well, i usually just end up taking stuff from jerks because i avoid confrontation, but sometimes i just snap and scream at people, mostly its not even the people im mad at

 

[AgDr_ODST]

he wasn't really a jerk but I was on Facebook when I saw a copied/pasted post from one of my mates. It was one of those things that asks you to follow the instructions in the comments then make it your status. It said pick the number that describe me and each number had a word or phrase such and 1) crazy, 2) funny, 3) BFF ect and asked you to pick a number from the availible options and make it your response. I did it and so did afew other dudes but one guy said I was number 12 which was wierd. Rather than lose my cool I cooly typed back: "normal is over rated and subject to people's opinions. I'd rather be me and be deemed weird than be "normal" any day of the week" the next guy to respond said "Oh shit zadok!! waz good my son". I got a good laugh after reading his response to my comeback.

 

[stone0042]

I love doing shit like this. Earlier today, in my lacrosse game a hulking senior was trying to start shit with my freshmen defender, who isn't very big or mean-natured. So the next time this asshole came near my net, I promptly ran out and cross-checked him in the chest, putting him in his ass. Man, it's nice being 6'4"

 

[Ki11erHyde]

My story is that in high school I used to hang out in the library during the lunch break, but this one freshman was always annoying me because I was not a confrontation person. One day during the period before lunch, I was really bored and took the red ink of one my pens and put it on top of a floppy disk(I do really, really stupid things when I'm bored)and was to lazy to wipe it off, so I went straight to the library. Now the annoying freshman came in near the end of lunch and once the bell rang decided to take my floppy disk. Now I wanted that disk back but knew he wasn't going to give it back easily so I told him what ever you do, do not rub that disk on your shirt. True to his annoying nature he rubbed the disk with red ink onto his WHITE shirt. After that he never bothered me again. Unfortunately, no one was in the library at the time so my deed was never spread around the school.

 

[Xeros]

I wailed on this bully's head with a desk. He'd been picking on me for the better part of the year, and then he picked the worst possible day to try again. I went into a fit of rage, slammed his head into a locker, walked into the adjacent classroom, grabbed a desk, and hit him over the head with it a couple times. The authorities (can't think of a better word at the moment) knew he'd been messing with me for a while and figured he'd gotten his just punishment, so I walked away with a slap on the wrist. That was a good day.

 

[Ham_authority95]

Well, I am a Muslim immigrant to America and I went to a school full of Southern, Republican, Catholics (in other words stupid, intollerant, Rednecks)and I got crap every damn day. In my math class (Geometry) we did a really hard problem and while I am great at math Geometry is my weakness. Anyways, I got it wrong and this stupid jock/"cool guy"/gangster wannabe (who had a 15 in the class not even joking) started shooting his mouth off saying "Oh look, Mr. Muslim got it wrong, school must not be going very well for you, are you gonna drop out of school and become a terrorist like the rest of your family?"

So I'm just like: Are you saying this stuff just to annoy me? or are you a genuine idiot?

He said: "What's that suppose to mean Sandnigger?" (with a stupid smirk on his face)

my ending statement: You know nothing of my family, my culture, or religion and yet you make these statements. You are ignorant and close-minded and you judge me based on what you learn from the media, you are an idiot. Still need a dictionary hot-shot?

I would pay money to see the look on that idiots face.....

OT: I tend to avoid getting in conflicts with douchebags, which is why I have never gotten the opportunity to do what DesiPrince did.

 

[ShinyMagnum]

I was at a house party for my brothers birthday, and it was around 3am and I decided to leave and was walking to my car I had left at a freinds acouple blocks away. As I came around a corner a wanna be banger probably in his late teens steps out from a bush. "Hey man you got a smoke?" I dont smoke, so I told him so and as I stepped to move around him he pulls this dinky pocket knife (I kid you not it couldnt be more than a couple of inches) and says "Well give me your wallet" Of course Im already in a bad mood over something that had happened earlier (ill spare ya the details) So I am in no mood to play with this douche. So I shook my head "sorry man dont have a wallet" Something he didnt want to hear no doubt. So he takes a step forward and I lean like in looking at someone behind him, of course hes paranoid so he glances behind him and I grabbed his wrist and yanked him off balance and I tried to knee him in the ribs But i dont know if i yanked harder than I though or what but I wound up kneeing him in the face and knocking him out cold. I picked up the knife and stole his wallet, Sad part was he had more money than i did so I took the cash and dropped the wallet in a storm drain on the way to my car.
To this day I wish I would have kept his id, it would have been awesome to show up on his doorstep someday. But I still have the pocket knife and use it to open my mail

sweet? Too bad you stole from him...kinda makes you as bad as him.

He had it coming. "You have now entered the justice field."

 

[ShinyMagnum]

In school my assistant pricipal was yelling at a bunch of people in my math class for being late and one of them said "our homeroom is the farthest you can get from this class w/out leaving the building" (true)
assistant principal-people have been getting here from your homeroomsince this school was founded

two things wrong with that- time between classes was half the time it had always been before this year AND this year was the first year that room was used for 7th grade math
me- this is the first year we've had 2 and a half minutes between classes and this room wasnt teaching 7th grade until now
assistant principal- are you talking back to me?!?
me- i have just as much a right to talk as you do
Ass. principal- no you dont this is an authoritarization and im the authoritarianizer!!! (starts screaming made up words to sound smart and stomping on the floor like a 4 year old, eight chins flapping wildly)
at this point even my math teacher was struggling not to laugh

Sounds just like my Principle at Secondary school (who looked like the man from pie in the sky for reference), he had a load of silly rules. One in paticular was that you weren't allowed to take your jumper off even in the height of summer, until he deigned to say it was summer.

So the scene is, I'm eating with my friends at the canteen breaking this rule, because it was really damn hot, could have been any of them, this time it was me. He makes me stand up in front of everyone there and shouts "Why aren't you wearing your jumper?!!" and I just say "Why?" firmly and without shame.

Blah, blah, blah, authority get to my office was the response. Later when he finally arrived I stated my case basically: it's really hot and that shouldn't be overridden by supposed neatness concerns.

Unfortunately my form tutor who was quite the dude convinced me that apologising would probably work out for the best, wish I'd known the true value of sod all he could have done.

 

[Megamocky]

i dont tell people off i try to git in their head a freak them out... also try and make them kill him/her self <3 (haven't told any one off yet)

 

[AbsoluteVirtue18]

Sorry this is so long.

I was playing Left 4 Dead and me and my friend Mark joined this game with two guys already in it. Apparently they wanted us gone and tried to kick us, but we canceled out their votes with ours. So they start shooting each other and stealing all the health packs to heal themselves with, leaving me and Mark with none. Then came the insults. Then came the attempted team killing.

Finally, it's the last part of the campaign and they still haven't let up. They're still stealing health packs, letting the special Infected come at us, calling us the stereotypical "Fag", "Queer", "Chicken-F**ker" (I had a good laugh at that one), etc. Then, just as the helicopter arrives another Tank shows up and incapacitates both of them. Mark and I are already in the chopper, so we start shooting the hell out of them and throw molotovs at them, and wind up killing both them and the Tank, and surviving No Mercy.

Later Mark and I meet up with our friend Kai, and out of the blue one of the guys from the previous game joins and starts to shoot at Mark. Almost damn near simultaneously me, Mark and Kai turn on him, kill him and kick him from the game, and to make sure they didn't follow us again, Mark's sister joined us.

Later, they both sent me and Mark obscene messages. It was so funny.

 

[Sneaky Paladin]

Well one of those kids in high school was talking about how soon he's just gonna have sex all the time and drink so I Went up to him and said

"combine them for every STD you get take a shot till you finally die" he shutup

 

[AfroTree]

Yes, thank you.

I'll use that the next time I'm in that shop... Not really I'll teach it to my little cousins so they use it in that shop.

Where did you learn all these language?

I know all. I am the master.

/sigh I'm done arguing. &#12354;&#12394;&#12383;&#12399;&#39340;&#40575;&#12391;&#12377;

No... You are the fool.

oh goddamn it

who cares?

really

it was a nice little story and chances are the guy was being a jerk, or was completely oblivious it was not a Japanese restaurant, but Chinese/Vietnamese

You acknowledge that you may have been wrong in your rash actions. There is hope for you yet, padawan.

.....what?

What is with your different guys? I can't manage looking at the name, I just assumed it was that corum-guy continuing the conversation.

How do you get off breaking into everything? What is your point?

I don't have one

I'm just here through survival of the fittest?

is that what you were looking for?

 

[Jiggabyte]

I've gotten into a few petty fights but nothing interesting. I don't usually have the balls or wit to do so.