Useless Superpower

[Kraj]

Sing! underwater.....

The ability to shapeshift into a bucket of water.

Really, what were those twins called from that one TV show? There was a girl and a guy, and when they shapeshifted the guy was always a bucket of water and the girl was always slightly more useful, but not that much more. I can't think of their names nor the name of the show, but those two characters sucked. They were completely useless.

Are you talking about that one part in Fairly Odd Parents when Timmy's Dad's super power is to turn into a bucket of water?

No, not at all. I believe it was Justice Friends, or Super Heroes, or something crazy... the two were members of a group of super heroes, I think it had some actual super heroes in it like Superman or something, but I don't remember who. All I remember is that it was kind of old. It should be noted that it wasn't always a bucket of water, sometimes it would be a block of ice or something, but it was always something H2O based and it was always useless.

Weren't they the wonder twins?
OT

The ability to go without sleep, for 16 hours a day.

 

[SkyHawkMkIV]

The ability to instantly teleport my boxers anywhere within a 1/2 mile radius. No, no. Not me wearing my boxers, just the boxers themselves.

 

[Riptide1]

The ability to shapeshift into a bucket of water.

Really, what were those twins called from that one TV show? There was a girl and a guy, and when they shapeshifted the guy was always a bucket of water and the girl was always slightly more useful, but not that much more. I can't think of their names nor the name of the show, but those two characters sucked. They were completely useless.

Also, I would love the ability to teleport like in Jumper. I would never actually draw attention to myself, but I would save tons of money on gas. Teleport into a store, buy what I want, and then teleport out right in front of everyone. Awesome. Who needs secrecy?

it was the Wonder Twins, they had rings that when they put them together and said "wonder twin powers activate" they could shape shift, the chick would always turn into some animal and the guy would turn into something water themed.

for the useless power... the ability to teleport forward exactly 1 of your normal stride lengths, but not through things, so say you couldn't teleport through a door only a single step forward.

 

[Subwayeatn]

The power to see one second into the future.

That would be EXTREMELY useful, haven't you ever been in a situation where if you reacted a second earlier you'd prevent something bad?

Like getting killed walking around a corner in an fps or stepping on a nail?

 

[MattyintheHatty]

To be able to play any instrument masterfully just by picking it up.
Somewhat of a lame Mutant Ability.

 

[Soul137]

I can hover off the ground but only while urinating. The more I have to go the higher.
I can also smoke a Newport 100 in 1 drag.
the best one is that all blind asian women under 5' (NOT children) automatically want to fondle my earlobes.

 

[spartan231490]

Really, a lot of the stock ones (controlling fire, telekinesis, etc.) would be pretty useless in everyday life haha. Unless you were a firefighter or a solider or something.

Telekinesis is useless in everyday life? How does that even make sense? Telekinesis is the most useful everyday super-power(IMHO).

OT: any small increase in sensory perception would be pretty useless, like having 20/10 vision. tactile-kinesis is pretty useless. You could do stuff with it, but not much.

 

[PureIrony]

The power to see one second into the future.

That would be EXTREMELY useful, haven't you ever been in a situation where if you reacted a second earlier you'd prevent something bad?

Like getting killed walking around a corner in an fps or stepping on a nail?

The way I see it is, you got one second: what are you going to do that could possibly prevent any serious problem? Even in a fistfight, you're going to need to be more than one second ahead of your opponent.

The best use I can think of is not dropping something.

 

[spartan231490]

The power to see one second into the future.

DUDE WTF?? Great power. Professional sports, professional video games, you could make so much money off that. Not to mention being damn hard to kill, it's fucking spider-sense. I want, so bad.

 

[Jason Danger Keyes]

The ability to smell in the dark would be pretty useless.

How about the ability to smell the dark?

 

[zombieeater6000]

The ability to change the color of your piss.

apparently there is a energy drink that already does this

 

[viking97]

The ability to communicate with plants. Useless. What interesting thing would grass have to say?

so uh...how's the weather up there?

 

[Newtonyd]

The ability to sleep upside down, like a bat.

But it's really uncomfortable and gives you a headrush.

 

[Korolev]

There's a pretty legendary useless super power that was actually in the comics a long time ago: it was the ability to make your limbs spontaneously fall off, to be used as weapons. Literally, there was a character called "arm-fall-off-boy" whose only ability was to make his arm fall off, so that he could club someone on the head with his detached arm. The pointlessness of this power is mind-boggling - if you're going to use your arm to hit someone, why not just punch them? Why detach your arm to use as a club? And isn't it a bit stupid to use your own limb as a weapon? Why not a baseball bat?

 

[Revenge Revisited]

The ability to turn one kind of cheese into another kind of cheese.

 

[Soul137]

my sidekick has the power to make his testicles incredibly dense. But it does put strain on his scrotum.

 

[viking97]

There's a pretty legendary useless super power that was actually in the comics a long time ago: it was the ability to make your limbs spontaneously fall off, to be used as weapons. Literally, there was a character called "arm-fall-off-boy" whose only ability was to make his arm fall off, so that he could club someone on the head with his detached arm. The pointlessness of this power is mind-boggling - if you're going to use your arm to hit someone, why not just punch them? Why detach your arm to use as a club? And isn't it a bit stupid to use your own limb as a weapon? Why not a baseball bat?

better reach, more leverage...

and do you really want to carry a bat around with you all the time?

i'd want this only if i could then reattach my fallen limbs.

 

[derob]

the ability to shape-shift into one of the three stooges (without having no control as to which of the three i will shift shape into)

 

[The Shade]

I actually have a useless superpower in real life!

I'm invisible to bartenders.