spartan231490 said:
Carbonyl said:
spartan231490 said:
Carbonyl said:
spartan231490 said:
The system always listens, the trick is knowing how to make it hear.
The system listens to power, and I had none of that.
You don't need power, you can borrow theirs. If you throw their own fears back in their face, they will believe it. It can't be helped, being afraid of something is admitting that it's possible. That's just one small way to do what we are talking about. there are many others.
How capable is a six year old of doing that to a school administrator? That was when I was pushed down. I was six and I was scared and I wanted help and I asked for it from my teacher, the next day the principal pulled me out of class, she told me that I needed to not tell, that I would be punished if I told anyone, that if I was quiet it wouldn't get worse, that it wasn't real anyway and no one would believe me. How the hell was I supposed to stand up to that, to find her fear, at the age of six I was shy and scared and friendless. I stood no chance and held no sway. I had no arsenal, and crying was frowned upon by the school.
You're outlook might work if the bullying starts in middle or high school, or if you actually have a friend or two, but when you're a little kid and grownups rule your existence, your advice is worthless.
It's not advice. I was merely clarifying that it can be done, and it doesn't necessarily have to do with intelligence in the normal sense of the word.
My advice would have been punch the kids in the face, cuz it's a lot easier and a lot more likely to work.
Doesn't really work in your example obviously, but you were a unique case. My advice to you would have go to your parents about the principle, but whatever.
I am not a unique case, kids are powerless, and grownups are scary. My parents had no idea what to do (though they tried as hard as they could), and I wouldn't tell anyone the extent of what happened because I was afraid.
Eventually, it did come down to punching the kids, though I tended to aim for the balls before going for the face. But as I said before, I wasn't fighting for me, I had no concept of being something worth fighting for, I was fighting for my brother, and through that learned to fight for myself. But I never would have fought for myself, the true damage is how the bullying teaches you to give up, that you have no options, that you're alone and it's enough to destroy any chance at psychological and emotional health well past the end of the active bullying. I know I'm still feeling it, and it's painful every waking second of the day, and it's what I have nightmares about. And I was one of the lucky ones. A lot of people end up worse, broken, violent, non-functional, deeply depressed. I'm relatively happy, and have finally gained social skills and some confidence.
I'm only unique in that I managed to finally escape it, and do so through my own agency.