You have just been caught masturbating! What do you do?!?!?!?!

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Paksenarrion

New member
Mar 13, 2009
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smearyllama said:
Paksenarrion said:
Depends on who walks in:

parents - *pretend i was just scratching an itch down there*
friends - I...I have no friends... *forever alone*
significant other - *gain +1 audience*
roommates - "You must gather your party before venturing forth."
whatever - *shoot lazers out of my vagina*

CAPTCHA: Control Isocisee
You always have the best responses.
You know, I think you should meet my sister.
You two would probably get along really well.
But...wouldn't she fall under "whatever"? Is this some sort of invitation to...dueling vagina lazers?
 

phelan511

New member
Oct 29, 2010
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Well I'd tell said person to get the hell out of my room. And tell them to knock next time. Now if its my girlfriend on the other hand I'd offer for her to finish for me.
 

smearyllama

New member
May 9, 2010
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Paksenarrion said:
smearyllama said:
Paksenarrion said:
Depends on who walks in:

parents - *pretend i was just scratching an itch down there*
friends - I...I have no friends... *forever alone*
significant other - *gain +1 audience*
roommates - "You must gather your party before venturing forth."
whatever - *shoot lazers out of my vagina*

CAPTCHA: Control Isocisee
You always have the best responses.
You know, I think you should meet my sister.
You two would probably get along really well.
But...wouldn't she fall under "whatever"? Is this some sort of invitation to...dueling vagina lazers?
...
I see what you did there.
Still, my eyes hurt from trying to imagine that.
You should be ashamed of yourself for putting that kind of image in a young man's mind!
 

ReaperzXIII

New member
Jan 3, 2010
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"It was either this or have sex with a hooker and I don't have that kind of money" Then finish

That or fake a mental break down whilst continuing.

Or alternatively "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZORZ!!!!"
 

Cryptotom

Hypnotist and freelance layabout
Jun 10, 2010
56
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Daniel Yarbrough said:
yah... you can consider this my two week notice
This made me laugh. A lot.

But I would probably look at them and say politely "Do you mind?"
 

William Dickbringer

New member
Feb 16, 2010
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well depending where I'm at (seeing as how I am on a computer laying in my bed) I'd cover up with a blanket (if family), still cover up and tell to wait outside and let me get ready (if friends and girlfriend(even though we'll end up right back in my room seeing as how we get no alone time as is))
 

Paksenarrion

New member
Mar 13, 2009
2,911
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smearyllama said:
Paksenarrion said:
smearyllama said:
Paksenarrion said:
Depends on who walks in:

parents - *pretend i was just scratching an itch down there*
friends - I...I have no friends... *forever alone*
significant other - *gain +1 audience*
roommates - "You must gather your party before venturing forth."
whatever - *shoot lazers out of my vagina*

CAPTCHA: Control Isocisee
You always have the best responses.
You know, I think you should meet my sister.
You two would probably get along really well.
But...wouldn't she fall under "whatever"? Is this some sort of invitation to...dueling vagina lazers?
...
I see what you did there.
Still, my eyes hurt from trying to imagine that.
You should be ashamed of yourself for putting that kind of image in a young man's mind!
Dueling Vagina Lazers: This is what really happens at sleepovers.

OR

Dueling Vagina Lazers: It's like a wild west duel, but with vagina lazers.
 

OmniscientOstrich

New member
Jan 6, 2011
2,879
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Probably come up with a lame excuse like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVlWqjVHgjc

Although at least my taste in porn isn't as bad as Randy's 0_0
 

pshardas

New member
Apr 17, 2011
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um, i would pick up my knife and aim at there throught. i think you know what happens next.
 

Ninonybox_v1legacy

New member
Apr 2, 2008
1,974
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pull a solo M. Night Shyamalan

It involves staring wide eyed into theres, while doing it faster and more violet, and as soon as your orgasm you scream (while staring) "I AM YOUR FATHER"
 

Anchupom

In it for the Pub Club cookies
Apr 15, 2009
779
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Well i'm in a duvet, I can bluff that i was scratching and pray to god they don't want to shift my covers and then discover my erect penis, partway through a poshwank.
 

Drakmorg

Local Cat
Aug 15, 2008
18,504
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If I get caught by Family/Friend/Unknown Man/Unattractive Unknown Woman: "Eh heh heh... this is awkwa-SMOKE BOMB" *Jumps out the window*

Attractive Woman: "Hey baby, you want in on this? If not, leave. Or not, your choice."