You should/shouldn't date the guy above me because...

[ShockValue]

Don't date. He's delusional.

 

[Tharwen]

Don't date. He's never read The God Delusion.

 

[ShockValue]

Don't date. Is planning on destroying the Earth.

 

[Tharwen]

Don't date. Is willing to settle for just the Earth.

 

[ShockValue]

Don't date. He's boring or something.

 

[Tharwen]

Don't date. He's unimaginative.

 

[Ildecia]

date. lazars are fun at parties.

 

[Tharwen]

Don't date. That crab is a spy!

 

[Fraught]

Don't date. He will kill you, no matter how sexy you are.

 

[Stone Wera]

Don't date.
He is evil... And not even a racoon at all!

 

[deadguynotyetburied]

Date. You don't have to tell him you're a raccoon until it's too late for him to back out.

 

[Totenkopf]

Date. He's loyal, even beyond death.

 

[deadguynotyetburied]

Don't date. He'll spend the entire evening comparing you unfavorably with his golden retriever.

 

[deadguynotyetburied]

For a good time, date avouleance.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Don't date. They are a rotting corpse.

 

[deadguynotyetburied]

Date. They may spontaneously combust.

 

[Johanthemonster666]

Should date... he's from California (and likes to sneak upstairs to your room *wink*)

 

[Asturiel]

Date, they are a monster in bed.

 

[ShockValue]

Date. He'll eat you if you don't.