Anti Joke time
- Thread starter Goldeneye1989
- Start date
Recommended Videos
What's the difference between a sword and a gun?
My mom was killed with a sword and my dad was killed with a gun.
My mom was killed with a sword and my dad was killed with a gun.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
EDIT. look at that, I have gone gonzo.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
EDIT. look at that, I have gone gonzo.
What did the one-eyed serial killer say to the female clown on the unicycle?
- nothing, he stabbed her to death.
Knock Knock
...
no one's home, I guess I'll leave then.
yesterday i saw a camel with 3 humps
- really?
yeah, it was a tumor, he died 20 minutes later.
- nothing, he stabbed her to death.
Knock Knock
...
no one's home, I guess I'll leave then.
yesterday i saw a camel with 3 humps
- really?
yeah, it was a tumor, he died 20 minutes later.
A bear walks into a bar and says "I'll have a gin..........and tonic."
He then proceeds to maul the bartender to death.
He then proceeds to maul the bartender to death.
An Indian man, a Gypsy man and a Japanese man walk into a bar.
The barman notes "my, what a diverse community".
The barman notes "my, what a diverse community".
Why did the fireman wear red suspenders?
It turns out that he'd been on a diet recently and lost quite a bit of weight. However, his wife didn't realise this and decided that she'd surprise him with a new set of pants. Of course, these pants were now too large owing to his reduced waistline. Not wanting to disappoint his wife, the fireman elected to wear suspenders to hold them up.
It turns out that he'd been on a diet recently and lost quite a bit of weight. However, his wife didn't realise this and decided that she'd surprise him with a new set of pants. Of course, these pants were now too large owing to his reduced waistline. Not wanting to disappoint his wife, the fireman elected to wear suspenders to hold them up.
