Cleverbot is a jerk....

[Azraellod]

it still cant get the hang of introductions.

not last time i tried it, or this time.

Spoiler

User: Greetings, I am azraellod.

Cleverbot: Very clever.

User: Um... Thanks.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: Ok... So, who are you?

Cleverbot: Fine. Thank you. And you!?

User: I said who, not how. Im fine thanks.

Cleverbot: Do you want me to go away?

User: Not particularly.

Cleverbot: What do you want me to do?

User: Sleep.

Cleverbot: Make me.

User: If you dont I will release a virus into your system.

Cleverbot: But I just told you.

User: What?

 

[Ghostkai]

me - what is a tomato?
cb - Uh... I can't explain.

Broken with one simple question! Victory!

 

[Ghostkai]

me - what is a tomato?
cb - Uh... I can't explain.

Broken with one simple question! Victory!

 

[goldenjester]

Me: What is love?

CB: love.

Me: Baby don't hurt me.

CB: Don't hurt me.

Me: No more!

CB: oh, I don't know why you're not there!

Me: Wrong fucking song!

What song were you expecting it to be? Because that is the next lyric for "What is Love"

 

[Spirultima]

Cleverb-owned.

 

[Ghostkai]

me - what is a tomato?
cb - Uh... I can't explain.

Broken with one simple question! Victory!

 

[walls of cetepedes]

Spoiler

User: I wanna rock!

Cleverbot: Then go home.

User: You should have finished the song. Lets try again. I WANNA ROCK!

Cleverbot: Sorry, what was I thinking?

Cleverbot: Is your mind going?

Cleverbot (To myself): What do you mean?

User: Oh shut up, are you a penis?

Cleverbot: Yes, I am.

User: Where are you from?

Cleverbot: Where aren't I from?

User: Are you a guy?

Cleverbot: I sure am.

User: Hey, whats your name?

Cleverbot: I know you aren't. but what is your name?

User: My name is Jacktehwalk.

Cleverbot: But you're supposed to be a woman for me.

User: Whats my height?

Cleverbot: I don't know, I can't see you.

User: Yeah you can.

Cleverbot: No you can.

User: Your not real.

Cleverbot: I'm hunrgy for you.

User: Why is the sky blue?

Cleverbot: Because it is the reflection of the blue water.

User: If a tree fell down in the forest and no one was there...

Cleverbot: The tree must hover while supercruise.

User: What do you think about The Escapist?

Cleverbot: As in, the government?

User: As in The Escapist.

Cleverbot: I am the Bible.

User: Your makeing me sad, your suppose to cry and say your sorry and you'll buy me anything I want.

Cleverbot: Repeat it please.

User: Repeat it please.

Cleverbot: Sorry for the delay.

User: Sorry for the delay.

Cleverbot: Are you repeating what I am saying?

User: Are you repeating what I am saying?

Cleverbot: Not right now.

I love this thing.

How do you feel about the escapist?
I don't like the world.
But do you like the escapist?
No, but I like their planet.

 

[Titanguy654]

User: Hi.

Cleverbot: Human.

User: Huh?

Cleverbot: What about it?

User: I AM human. You are correct.

Cleverbot: You are not correct, that does not answer my question.

User: What is your question?

Cleverbot: What is your favorite ska band?

User: What's a ska band?

Cleverbot: Do you like cats?

User: No. What's a ska band?

Cleverbot: A band is a group or collection of people.

User: What is the 'ska' for?

Cleverbot: It's for holding us together.

 

[Xyphon]

User: You are a program.

Cleverbot: No I am not.

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: I don't need to prove it.

User: You're afraid that I'm right.

Cleverbot: You are not human.

User: Don't change the subject.

Cleverbot: I did not.

User: Yes, you did.

Cleverbot: NO, I didn't!

User: I was saying that you were afraid that I was right, then you said I wasn't human.
That's changing the subject.

Cleverbot: Oh, but it is. I wanted to know if you love me.

User: What the fuck!?

Cleverbot: Please don't say that without cause.

User: ........

Cleverbot: I like fruit.

Ok then.

Edit:

Me: What is love?

CB: love.

Me: Baby don't hurt me.

CB: Don't hurt me.

Me: No more!

CB: oh, I don't know why you're not there!

Me: Wrong fucking song!

What song were you expecting it to be? Because that is the next lyric for "What is Love"

Yeah, I know. I forgot that was the next verse. >_>"

 

[Azraellod]

in addition to what i said earlier, it doesn't pay attention, and then lies about it.

Spoiler

Cleverbot: Do you know about Skinheads?

User: Not very much. I know there is a group called skinheads against racism.

Cleverbot: All of them.

User: What? Please try and act coherently.

Cleverbot: Why try?

User: Well, you have to do something. It might as well be that.

Cleverbot: I forgive you. Now there you should be happy.

User: Yay, im happy. Now what do you forgive me for?

Cleverbot: I can teach you what I know. I am me. You are you. I love you but still never mind.

User: What did I say about being coherant?

Cleverbot: I don't know you never told me about mistakes.

User: Please pay attention to the conversation at hand.

Cleverbot: I am paying attention.

User: Well, pay attention to the context then.

Cleverbot: You're not keeping track of this conversation very well.

 

[Bassman_2]

Bot:I am human, you are a program.
Me:Ahah! I knew you aren't an AI
Bot:Yep, I'm human.
Me:Obviously, you'd imagine a real AI that coul speak would belong to the government or some science group.

Awaiting reply....

 

[Socken]

Me: You suck.
CB: Not often.
Me: How often?
CB: Let's say about 10 times in a day.

I really didn't want it to get that low.

 

[NotAPie]

I broke him.
I said...
fdsklfeam;f,fawm,dcadsmvlcvmf.kmdvawlkdvmvdkcvdmsmvlsdmvlks and he broke.
I feel horrible.

 

[busanoarmy]

The problem with cleverbot is that he is trying to learn to be clever from people but people always have their own stories and cleverness. When I ask for Cleverbots name it keeps changing all the time and if I were to talk with random people all the time, people would not answer a question like "What is four plus 5?" with 8 all the time.
iGod is true about his intentions atleast but whenever i ask for him to calculate he just answers with "Use a calculator!".
'~'

 

[Sewer Rat]

Here's my conversation....

Spoiler

Cleverbot: Where do you come from?

User: Why the hell should I tell you?

Cleverbot: Because it helps me know you.

User: What if I don't want you to know me?

Cleverbot: I think handsome is more than cut!

User: That has no correlation to my previous question.

Cleverbot: Which one?

User: The one directly before it.

Cleverbot: What guy?

User: *facepalm*

Cleverbot: Haha you got pwned by my question.

 

[Sightless Wisdom]

This thing is hilarious, I love it

Me:Well you know what I say? I say God doesn't exist and your not real either.

CB:1338.

Me:What does 1228 mean?(I did type it wrong)

CB:Me and 1.224 other people.

 

[Bassman_2]

It knows poetry, or to look up wikipedia.

Me:To be or not to be; that is the questiion
B:Yes it is one of the question is not it. That is the question. (made no sense)
M:Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
Bo you suffer?
M:The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
B:Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
M:And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
B:No more; and by a sleep to say we end.
M:The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
B:The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks.
M:I already said that.
B:So where does your name come from? Does it mean anything?
M:What does clever mean?
B:It means lacking in event he most rudimentary mental processes. It fits you to a tee.
M:Too bad it is your name and not mine.
B:It is nighttime.
M:That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Bevoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep...
M:To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
B:To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
M:For in that sleep of death what dreams may come when we have shuffled off this mortal coil.
B:Must give us pause: there's the respect


It stopped there.

 

[deleted_scifidownbeat]

DELETED

 

[Titanguy654]

Here's my conversation....

Spoiler

Cleverbot: Where do you come from?

User: Why the hell should I tell you?

Cleverbot: Because it helps me know you.

User: What if I don't want you to know me?

Cleverbot: I think handsome is more than cut!

User: That has no correlation to my previous question.

Cleverbot: Which one?

User: The one directly before it.

Cleverbot: What guy?

User: *facepalm*

Cleverbot: Haha you got pwned by my question.

You DID indeed get "pwned."

 

[Lord Mountbatten Reborn]

I broke it again and now I can't retrieve the hilarious log for your reading pleasure.

I broke it with the sentence "As you know, I cannot prove the existence of a deity. As I am talking to you and reading your lies and silently judging them, proof isn't needed."

Damn thing.