This advice is evil.johnfistyadams said:
OT: I'd get pretty pissed in this situation but these are the cards you have been dealt. You have got to be the best dad you can now.
Dear Escapist, I F*cked up.
- Thread starter Ruzzian Roulette
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OT: I'd get pretty pissed in this situation but these are the cards you have been dealt. You have got to be the best dad you can now.
From how he explained her, that doesn't sound too out of character.dragon_of_red said:
Well, I guess what you have to do is tell her how you feel about it. You could just tell her you don't want to be with her and the baby, or see if you can think of something else.
Asking us to help you isn't going to work as well as telling her how you feel.
If you read the entire OP, you'll see that they broke up before he hooked up with her.loves2spooge said:
Yeah. You screwed up and found yourself a gold digger. Rather odd one, but a gold digger none the less.
You don't just forget to take something that important- its like a diabetic not taking their insulin.
All that aside it's happened already and doesn't really matter. Man up- you got yourself a lot of shit to sift through and not actually doing anything about it won't help. Figure out what you want to do, figure out what she wants to do, and find a happy medium. If she's literally just doing this to be a dependent little leech you can either pony up what meager earnings a kid with a high school diploma can offer or fall off the radar altogether. It's kind of running away from the problem but she's also kind of literally trying to fuck over your life.
You don't just forget to take something that important- its like a diabetic not taking their insulin.
All that aside it's happened already and doesn't really matter. Man up- you got yourself a lot of shit to sift through and not actually doing anything about it won't help. Figure out what you want to do, figure out what she wants to do, and find a happy medium. If she's literally just doing this to be a dependent little leech you can either pony up what meager earnings a kid with a high school diploma can offer or fall off the radar altogether. It's kind of running away from the problem but she's also kind of literally trying to fuck over your life.
Ahh hell,
run... run as fast as you can.
Sure you will have to pay child support, but for once running is justified.
From what i understand she tricked you into having a child (sure you did have sex with her, but that was under the pretence of her being on the pill).
and she was the one who wanted and still wants the kid, to her from what i understand, shes acting like you are a sperm donner (sp?) so she should be more than willing to rase the kid up by herself.
At most you will have to pay child support (its always the guys fault, even in these situations, blame the law for that oppinion. not me).
yes i know im evil and all for not thinking of the kid, but seriously this is the only way your lifes not going be ruled by a kid you do not, and did not want at the time, and for which you are not resposible for (due to the lie on her part tricking you (if this is the truth ofcourse) for the next 20 or so years.
And to be honest isnt it better for him to have a mother that wants him, or a pair of fighting pairents where one who didnt even want him in the first place and more than likely eventually leaves (i dont know you so i cant really judge wether you would stick it till the end or leave but odds are most would leave).
run... run as fast as you can.
Sure you will have to pay child support, but for once running is justified.
From what i understand she tricked you into having a child (sure you did have sex with her, but that was under the pretence of her being on the pill).
and she was the one who wanted and still wants the kid, to her from what i understand, shes acting like you are a sperm donner (sp?) so she should be more than willing to rase the kid up by herself.
At most you will have to pay child support (its always the guys fault, even in these situations, blame the law for that oppinion. not me).
yes i know im evil and all for not thinking of the kid, but seriously this is the only way your lifes not going be ruled by a kid you do not, and did not want at the time, and for which you are not resposible for (due to the lie on her part tricking you (if this is the truth ofcourse) for the next 20 or so years.
And to be honest isnt it better for him to have a mother that wants him, or a pair of fighting pairents where one who didnt even want him in the first place and more than likely eventually leaves (i dont know you so i cant really judge wether you would stick it till the end or leave but odds are most would leave).
Just more proof right here you never EVER EVER EVER stop using a condom until you're married. I've read too many of these stories to ever trust a girl like this.
And yes, forgetting to take the pill for a week is just.....not possible. I think she fooled you, and she's one of those psycho chicks who will do anything to get a baby, and she saw you as the perfect tool.
As for the advice? Well, the first thing I would make sure of is that it's your kid. If it isn't, screw the girl for making the last 9 months of your life complete shit. If it is, you need to ask yourself, are you mature enough or willing enough to raise this kid? I know I sure am not.
If you really aren't, and she is keeping this kid, child support is your best bet. Don't destroy your young life with this mistake.
Don't be a fool, wrap your tool.
And yes, forgetting to take the pill for a week is just.....not possible. I think she fooled you, and she's one of those psycho chicks who will do anything to get a baby, and she saw you as the perfect tool.
As for the advice? Well, the first thing I would make sure of is that it's your kid. If it isn't, screw the girl for making the last 9 months of your life complete shit. If it is, you need to ask yourself, are you mature enough or willing enough to raise this kid? I know I sure am not.
If you really aren't, and she is keeping this kid, child support is your best bet. Don't destroy your young life with this mistake.
Don't be a fool, wrap your tool.
As tempting as it may seem, don't simply pay child support and let her raise the kid. Really. She is, and I know this may sound judgemental because I've not met her and this is over the net and it's still up for debate whether or not she forgot the pill (It's a pretty one sided debate, mind you), a TERRIBLE human being who should never, under any circumstances be allowed to raise a child. With this in mind, and a huge dose of tact, be sure to speak with her parents to make sure that they'll take huge interest in the child. That may be difficult if you don't immediately establish yourself as the good guy to them by explaining that you want to support this child in every way possible, but under no circumstances are you to let her raise the kid alone. She will do nothing but damage to the kid, and raising him/her alone will do nothing but damage to her. I've no real suggestions for making your life better, so I'm focusing on the child here: Don't let that decietful, scheming harpy keep you away from it.
On a side note, anyone else find how ruthless outsiders are to people in situations like this? This is possibly the worst thing any man could ever go through, and the only support he gets is everyone around him telling him he's a dumbass and fcked up big time, and should just man up.
I'd feel pretty alone and suicidal.
I'd feel pretty alone and suicidal.
SHE LIED TO YOU! Why is it your problem if SHE "FORGOTT" to take her pills,she sounds like she wants someones money for the next 18 years. Get the baby tested when it comes, and just go off to collage, she is probally using you, go ask her old boyfriend why they broke up, I bet its because she was baby crazy. If not, then I have no clue what the fuck to do mate.
Oh, and next time, WRAP YOUR STUMP BEFORE YOU HUMP.
Oh, and next time, WRAP YOUR STUMP BEFORE YOU HUMP.
Before she took you upstairs did she happen to offer you a Dr Pepper??
"Whats the worst that can happen..."
My god i wouldn't like to be you right now so good luck to you my friend!!
It sounds quite a bit liked she trapped you into this on purpose, sadly being guy a sex trap is still sex and you willingly hoped skipped and jumped right into it.
I would definitely get proof its yours cos it does sound a little convenient that she just jumps straight into bed with you after walking out the door on another guy and BAM now theres a bun in the oven.
"Whats the worst that can happen..."
My god i wouldn't like to be you right now so good luck to you my friend!!
It sounds quite a bit liked she trapped you into this on purpose, sadly being guy a sex trap is still sex and you willingly hoped skipped and jumped right into it.
I would definitely get proof its yours cos it does sound a little convenient that she just jumps straight into bed with you after walking out the door on another guy and BAM now theres a bun in the oven.
Like others have said. Becoming a father may not be the worst thing you have to "look forward to".
Get yourself tested, for practically everything. Get the dna test on the kid.
If the kid is yours, congrats.
If the kid is not yours? Go buy yourself a supply of condoms. If you arent a man enough to buy (and use) condoms or be prepared to raise your kid, dont have sex.
It isnt just one persons obligation to use protection during sex, ALL parties should.
Get yourself tested, for practically everything. Get the dna test on the kid.
If the kid is yours, congrats.
If the kid is not yours? Go buy yourself a supply of condoms. If you arent a man enough to buy (and use) condoms or be prepared to raise your kid, dont have sex.
It isnt just one persons obligation to use protection during sex, ALL parties should.
I went out with a girl once who was able to tie me around her finger. Can't say I was proud about it, but I knew how much control she had over me. It was the main problem that after a while, I found out that just about everything she'd told me was a lie, because of her friend who also liked and wanted me herself.
OT, I've heard about stuff like this before. Girl wants a baby, so she hooks up with a good friend and it comes off as an 'accident'. Well, I hope you like being a father. My cousin did until he wasn't allowed to see his kid anymore. Maybe you'll feel the same way, maybe not. Best of luck to you.
OT, I've heard about stuff like this before. Girl wants a baby, so she hooks up with a good friend and it comes off as an 'accident'. Well, I hope you like being a father. My cousin did until he wasn't allowed to see his kid anymore. Maybe you'll feel the same way, maybe not. Best of luck to you.
It sounds pretty obvious she lied to you and manipulated you- so you owe her nothing.
If you can't convince her to abort/adopt and you're certain it's yours....give her the money for an abortion, and then leave the town, or even the country. This whole thing has been due to her decisions- your carelessness, sure, but her informed decisions.
So leave the decision with her, and start a new life.
Of course, if she doesn't abort/adopt even then, you may feel responsible for the kid; but personally I wouldn't. She told you she was on the pill then stopped taking it without telling you. Only one of you had any intent to- or consented to- have a child.
(I do feel sorry for the kid though. But then, no-one gets to choose the circumstances of their birth)
If you can't convince her to abort/adopt and you're certain it's yours....give her the money for an abortion, and then leave the town, or even the country. This whole thing has been due to her decisions- your carelessness, sure, but her informed decisions.
So leave the decision with her, and start a new life.
Of course, if she doesn't abort/adopt even then, you may feel responsible for the kid; but personally I wouldn't. She told you she was on the pill then stopped taking it without telling you. Only one of you had any intent to- or consented to- have a child.
(I do feel sorry for the kid though. But then, no-one gets to choose the circumstances of their birth)
since no one clearly has given any good suggestions.
Maybe you should ask the big question.
Is it really your baby or did she screw around with others at the time?
From the sounds of it , if she was already someone else's girlfriend at the time , then she might of been doing someone else at the same time.
Other question.
Why didn't you wear some protection, the pill is good for stopping some things, but those warts on your dick don't go away man.
Seriously get some legal advice if your that concerned.
Maybe you should ask the big question.
Is it really your baby or did she screw around with others at the time?
From the sounds of it , if she was already someone else's girlfriend at the time , then she might of been doing someone else at the same time.
Other question.
Why didn't you wear some protection, the pill is good for stopping some things, but those warts on your dick don't go away man.
Seriously get some legal advice if your that concerned.
Punch the girl in the stomache really hard.
Or push her down some stairs.
Either of the two would work.
But in all seriousness, she really should abort if you don't feel ready for a child. Keeping a child just because the mother wants it is selfish, I mean seriously, you have the rest of your life to lead and a child would most probably ruin A LOT of things.
Or push her down some stairs.
Either of the two would work.
But in all seriousness, she really should abort if you don't feel ready for a child. Keeping a child just because the mother wants it is selfish, I mean seriously, you have the rest of your life to lead and a child would most probably ruin A LOT of things.
Has she proven she's pregnant?
If yes, make her prove it's yours.
If it is, convince her to abort it.
If she doesn't abort it, get her really plastered in hopes it'll kill the fetus. Especially if you shove her down the stairs and claim she was so drunk that she fell.
Okay, so it's harsh, but effective!
If yes, make her prove it's yours.
If it is, convince her to abort it.
If she doesn't abort it, get her really plastered in hopes it'll kill the fetus. Especially if you shove her down the stairs and claim she was so drunk that she fell.
Okay, so it's harsh, but effective!
Geez. As others have also said, get her to take a pregnancy test, and if she is actually pregnant, if it is your kid, take responsibility. You're gonna now have a kid, take good care of it.
EDIT: Also try to get her to get an abortion, if you don't think your ready, also find out if it is your kid just in case, because if it isn't then you shouldn't be the one in this situation, the real father should be.
EDIT: Also try to get her to get an abortion, if you don't think your ready, also find out if it is your kid just in case, because if it isn't then you shouldn't be the one in this situation, the real father should be.
idk, the relationship could work if you both stick it out and look for the best, then everything would be more enjoyable.
Best of luck any way this goes, just keep us updated! [i got a feeling this baby might become the escapists' mascot or something, maybe you should post ultrasounds XD (that was a joke)]
Best of luck any way this goes, just keep us updated! [i got a feeling this baby might become the escapists' mascot or something, maybe you should post ultrasounds XD (that was a joke)]
It seems like you and a lot of ppl on this forum think you HAVE TO care for this child, but personally i wouldnt agree. Yes, its great if you take responsiblity and do your best to get involved with your child's life and try to support him/her as best you can. But this is not your ONLY option, your SEVENTEEN dude! Your just a kid! You are not really expected to be able to capable of handling this kind of responsibility yet. You can wait a few years before you get fully involved, meanwhile just stay in touch with you kid as much as you feel you need (don't ignore the fact, never good).
Anyway, wish you luck in whatever you decide to do. sorry bout the mess yur in, take care.
side-not: prbly not what u want to hear right now (but could be useful for future), but where was the condom? Pills are great, but you never want to take risks, take double precautions. One reason is, shit happens (biochemistry). the second one is, shit happens (ppl). the second one refers to the human factor of the pill, sometime girls forget or something, other times they lie on purpose (like ur worried is what happened).
Anyway, wish you luck in whatever you decide to do. sorry bout the mess yur in, take care.
side-not: prbly not what u want to hear right now (but could be useful for future), but where was the condom? Pills are great, but you never want to take risks, take double precautions. One reason is, shit happens (biochemistry). the second one is, shit happens (ppl). the second one refers to the human factor of the pill, sometime girls forget or something, other times they lie on purpose (like ur worried is what happened).