If you met God
- Thread starter squidbuddy99
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Well considering he's all knowing it would be kinda annoying not to meantion most of his answers would be incomprehensible.
Probally
"Hey God can you order the angels to come down to earth and lay the smack down on lucifer,also tell Jesus to stop messing around pretending to be chuck norris and come back down to earth to help save us"
Probally
"Hey God can you order the angels to come down to earth and lay the smack down on lucifer,also tell Jesus to stop messing around pretending to be chuck norris and come back down to earth to help save us"
Me: Oh so you really do exist?
God: Yes I do.
Me: That is... So how are my family and friends now that I'm dead and whatnot?
God: They miss you greatly.
Me: So am I going to be punished for not realizing you were real while I was alive?
God: I'm afraid that is how it works.
Me: So are you the Christian God?
God: No. You see all the religions of humanity are wrong about me and my message. Although Christianity is the closest to being right.
Me: So how would I know that? Wait. By that logic do Christians even get into Heaven?
God: Only the ones that truly love me and my son.
Me: What kind of sick bastard are you?
God: You have to ask? WHY IMA
OF COURSE!!!
*Gets shoved down into the bowels of hell*
Satan: Sup new guy?
Me: O___O
Satan: Oh don't worry we are actually pretty cool down here. You humans just gave us a horrible rep for some reason.
Me: S-so I'm not going to be tortured for eternity?
Satan: *loud laugh* Of course not! You see the big G's idea of Hell is just being as far as way from him and his son as possible. The guy is a self loving tool.
Me: Wow. Awesome. I think I just jizzed. I don't have to be butt raped by demons for eternity. Oh thank Go- . . . Just thank.
Satan: Well! have fun.
AND THAT overly long post would be one scenario. Just one. *shifty eyes*
God: Yes I do.
Me: That is... So how are my family and friends now that I'm dead and whatnot?
God: They miss you greatly.
Me: So am I going to be punished for not realizing you were real while I was alive?
God: I'm afraid that is how it works.
Me: So are you the Christian God?
God: No. You see all the religions of humanity are wrong about me and my message. Although Christianity is the closest to being right.
Me: So how would I know that? Wait. By that logic do Christians even get into Heaven?
God: Only the ones that truly love me and my son.
Me: What kind of sick bastard are you?
God: You have to ask? WHY IMA
*Gets shoved down into the bowels of hell*
Satan: Sup new guy?
Me: O___O
Satan: Oh don't worry we are actually pretty cool down here. You humans just gave us a horrible rep for some reason.
Me: S-so I'm not going to be tortured for eternity?
Satan: *loud laugh* Of course not! You see the big G's idea of Hell is just being as far as way from him and his son as possible. The guy is a self loving tool.
Me: Wow. Awesome. I think I just jizzed. I don't have to be butt raped by demons for eternity. Oh thank Go- . . . Just thank.
Satan: Well! have fun.
AND THAT overly long post would be one scenario. Just one. *shifty eyes*
First i would say "Kyle Sandilands?...Why god?, why?"
Id then buy him a beer and ask for a LAPD Future Cop remake
Id then buy him a beer and ask for a LAPD Future Cop remake
I think I would ask if the topmost guy of his clerical Order (like the pope) truelly believed in him.
That ist something I always wanted to know.
Also, I guess, I would like to know what he thought of his work now.
(It seemed like a good Idea at the time, apparently)
That ist something I always wanted to know.
Also, I guess, I would like to know what he thought of his work now.
(It seemed like a good Idea at the time, apparently)
I think I love you!Always_Remain said:Me: Oh so you really do exist?
God: Yes I do.
Me: That is... So how are my family and friends now that I'm dead and whatnot?
God: They miss you greatly.
Me: So am I going to be punished for not realizing you were real while I was alive?
God: I'm afraid that is how it works.
Me: So are you the Christian God?
God: No. You see all the religions of humanity are wrong about me and my message. Although Christianity is the closest to being right.
Me: So how would I know that? Wait. By that logic do Christians even get into Heaven?
God: Only the ones that truly love me and my son.
Me: What kind of sick bastard are you?
God: You have to ask? WHY IMAOF COURSE!!!
*Gets shoved down into the bowels of hell*
Satan: Sup new guy?
Me: O___O
Satan: Oh don't worry we are actually pretty cool down here. You humans just gave us a horrible rep for some reason.
Me: S-so I'm not going to be tortured for eternity?
Satan: *loud laugh* Of course not! You see the big G's idea of Hell is just being as far as way from him and his son as possible. The guy is a self loving tool.
Me: Wow. Awesome. I think I just jizzed. I don't have to be butt raped by demons for eternity. Oh thank Go- . . . Just thank.
Satan: Well! have fun.
AND THAT overly long post would be one scenario. Just one. *shifty eyes*
Right back at ya, my friend!EightGaugeHippo said:I think I love you!Always_Remain said:Me: Oh so you really do exist?
God: Yes I do.
Me: That is... So how are my family and friends now that I'm dead and whatnot?
God: They miss you greatly.
Me: So am I going to be punished for not realizing you were real while I was alive?
God: I'm afraid that is how it works.
Me: So are you the Christian God?
God: No. You see all the religions of humanity are wrong about me and my message. Although Christianity is the closest to being right.
Me: So how would I know that? Wait. By that logic do Christians even get into Heaven?
God: Only the ones that truly love me and my son.
Me: What kind of sick bastard are you?
God: You have to ask? WHY IMAOF COURSE!!!
*Gets shoved down into the bowels of hell*
Satan: Sup new guy?
Me: O___O
Satan: Oh don't worry we are actually pretty cool down here. You humans just gave us a horrible rep for some reason.
Me: S-so I'm not going to be tortured for eternity?
Satan: *loud laugh* Of course not! You see the big G's idea of Hell is just being as far as way from him and his son as possible. The guy is a self loving tool.
Me: Wow. Awesome. I think I just jizzed. I don't have to be butt raped by demons for eternity. Oh thank Go- . . . Just thank.
Satan: Well! have fun.
AND THAT overly long post would be one scenario. Just one. *shifty eyes*
I don't know, how much time do I have with him. After I'd gotten over the shock of meeting him, I'd have alot of questions.
I'd ask him to explain all the questions I have about the universe then beg him for some kind of power or lotsa money or somethin
Lol or you could just make yourself known to humanity. Just fucking reach a giant hand down and draw attention to yourself, don't make humanity and not proove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you exist and then get all pissy when people stop believing in you because you gave them free will to do and think what they want.Daipire said:
As far as I'm concerned, God doesn't actually exist. I mean, seriously, what's all this bullshit about not showing yourself to the masses is a huge ray of light or just appirating as a giant man? I mean, I god seriously not allowed to show himself on earth? What the fuck?? HE'S FUCKING GOD. He alledgedly created the universe, he could do whatever the fuck he wants.