If you were an alien civilization, how would you invade earth and why?

[Treblaine]

I'd try to trigger a nuclear war, have the superpowers both destroy each other and use of most of their nuclear weapons.

I mean one huge problem is going to be nuclear submarines, those are going to be hard even for an advanced alien fleet to track down and who knows the capability of their ballistic missiles. Getting them to launch their weapons would be a good way.

First port of call is setting up a base on the Moon and amassing materiel and warriors (aliens?) for an invasion. It will be VERY difficult, especially once the puny humans figure out what is going on they will begin mass producing nuclear bombs and who knows for once they might start working together rather than against each other.

Still, I think the aim is to take the planet mostly intact, so even though it would be easy to pelt them with vast quantities of hugely powerful nuclear weapons it would just create a dead radioactive planet. Might as well just invade Mars then (unless if all they want are our vast quantities of liquid water).

I could try to deliver an ultimatum and play their respective sides off each other, say whoever will lay down their arms will be spared, but the other destroyed and enslaved. Probably won't work, but it will at least sow dissent.

 

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

If I had to for some reason, first I would make sure there was nothing on the planet I was allergic to. You know, like water. Or the common cold.

This most basic of logical errors out of the way, I would probably go in for diplomatic relations, get set up as a loyal friend and ally of Earth, slowly sabotage all of their militaries equipment under the guise of improving it, then disable all their weapons, destroy the military, capture or kill the leaders of every government, and use fear to get people to bend to my new system, before slowly relaxing controls again so people don't revolt and try to blow us up.

Oh, and I'd make sure I wasn't an overactor, or had a strange compulsion to teach my slaves how to overthrow me in detail. (I'm looking at you psychlos...)

Then again, while you were still learning how to SPELL YOUR NAME! I, was being trained, to CONQUER GALAXIES!

 

[TheFacelessOne]

1. I'd mass bombard from orbit
2. Just for teh lulz

But I might just help them. I dunno. Depends if I had my cup of joe that morning.

 

[RanD00M]

In truth,if I were an aliens race,I wouldn't invade earth.There's is nothing of value here,and I would be too busy having hot sweaty alien sex.

 

[Lord of the Pit]

probably would'nt.

 

[kingcom]

Virus Bombs from orbit. Exterminatus.

 

[Ham_authority95]

I would start by weakening the military of every developed nation in the world by turning them against each other.

Then, I would order my warriors to gather up 200,000 people to be executed on live TV to lower the world's moral.

I would follow that up by sending in robot mercenaries to raid the towns and cities of the world for resources

Whichever human survives the ensuing melee will become a part of my special forces team!

finally, I would melt the surface of the earth. VERY slowly.

 

[heyheysg]

Send down people disguised as Jesus and angels to Christian countries. Anyone who tries to fight back is 'raptured'. The rest we demand tribute. This can be done via a mass broadcast where a enormous holy cloud and a host of brightly shining angels descend from the heavens. Then simply use matter transformers to turn water into wine etc.

Once we have what we want, either poison, mass voluntary suicide will work (they all go to heaven).

Then repeat for other types of religions until only atheists are left. Then just shoot them

 

[bubba145]

In following the Harry Turtledove School of Warfare. pick a time where your tech is better by a few years and have at it. Also so when are we going to get MACs as well as Giant Spaceship Combat.

 

[Insanum]

I'd just blow up the moon.

Genius?

 

[narwhalman218]

I'd go the Plan 9 From Outer Space route of using zombies to ruin Bela Lugosi's career.

 

[Johnmw]

I would scourge the heavens with my anti-matter beam cannons! Serves you right for wasting all that tasty tasty plastic!

 

[GODoftheRIGOVERSE]

I would pretend to be friendly at first but then start killing everybody so we could have another planet we could use as a throphy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oC5O9NFWZCs

[http://photobucket.com/images/mars%20attacks]

ACK! ACK!! ACK!!!

 

[gigastrike]

I'd exploit my space advantage and bombard from orbit with my star fleet supported by and anti-missile system made out of smaller ships that guard the edges of my formation and destroy incoming ICBMs with lasers. With Earth's most threatening forces defeated, my dropships would decend while my fleet provided covering fire and bring down my ground forces...which would expand while my fleet provided covering fire.

You can never have too much covering fire.

 

[Ldude893]

I'd drop black monoliths onto the planet while the human race still hasn't involve yet. They'll fight amongst themselves.

 

[thestickman91]

I wouldn't because invading earth never seems to work out for the aliens. I would probably get defeated by The Doctor anyway

 

[Trace of Legacy]

I have a 12 part plan for this. . . but it may have a few holes in it

1. Study them from orbit by hacking into one of their satellites.

2. Destroy the satellites that are orbiting Earth thus crippling their communications and rendering the worlds largest nations military effectively useless.

3. Mass riots ensue.

4. Send some remote controlled ship to destroy the major cities around the world.

5. Send different ships to destroy the remote controlled ships.

6. Go down and say that you destroyed the invading armada.

7. Help them rebuild to a little better then what they were.

8. Leave.

9. R&R.

10. Return to Earth and accuse them of being the enemy.

11. Threaten to destroy them if they don't surrender to you.

12. Enslave or Destroy anyway.



Or just orbital bombard them

 

[KungFuCthulhu]

Holy F***, I just realized the OP must be an agent of the alien invaders looking for ideas!

* equip tinfoil hat *

You better hope that tinfoil hat can deflect LAZERS!