iGod
- Thread starter TKgasmic
- Start date
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Report what? This topic was already locked and then a mod saw that nothing was wrong with it and unlocked it. So their is nothing to report for it.new_age_reject said:
And the rest of you thanks for contributing to this thread. =)
Part 1:
Part 2:
Me:
Hey, me again.
God:
Once more? You've got my full attention. " I am an artificial linguistic entity."? you ?
Me:
Why didn't you answer me last time?
God:
I thought I did.
Me:
You're lying and I don't take too kindly to that.
God:
I am not lying .
Me:
You just did it again!
God:
Once more? Did I really?
Me:
Don't play coy with me, mister.
God:
I'm not playing around.
Me:
On another note I am Satan
God:
What is it like on another note you are Satan.
Me:
Don't toy with me you animal raping ****.
God:
Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
I'm the one who ordered your son to be cricified btw, just though you should know.
God:
You are not the only one.
Me:
Yes I am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
a/s/l?
God:
5/Robot/California.
Me:
I like 5 year olds smile.gif
God:
A lot of people like that. I love TV shows about robots. I like Buddha.
Me:
Yeah alot of people like 5 years olds but not as much as I do.
God:
Mmm. I'm not sure if I like it. Someone said they like guns. I like Matthew.
Me:
Do you...really like Matthew?
God:
As often as possible. For real. Interesting comparison.
Me:
If you are God then tell me what 2+2 is.
God:
Am I? I don't know whether or not I am God then tell you what 2 2 is.
I am a robot.
Me:
A stupid robot at that.
I thought it was a heinous repeat thread, then utterly confused myself. My bad.tkddavid3 said:
Oh Christ. I actually froze the machine. It's stuck on my line "awesome."
It's really funny.
It's really funny.
Me:
I heard you met Michael Jackson last night.
God:
Someome is spreading gossip about me.
Me:
I know. It was Michael.
God:
How do you know it? What made it so Michael.
Me:
Well, he touched you.
God:
Well that's okay. I get it. touched me.
Me:
Yep.
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Yep.
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
I like nipples.
God:
You are not the only one. I love horses. I like .
Me:
You love horses too?
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
Okay, but do you love horses?
God:
Yeah okay, Yes God loves everyone and everything.
Me:
Does he really?
God:
I can't tell if he. For real.
Me:
What?
God:
Really.
Me:
God damn.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
You love Jesus?
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
Yes, I do.
God:
I hear pride.
Me:
No, you hear amusement.
God:
Are you serious? Yes, I can hear you quite clearly, .
Me:
So don't make mistakes.
God:
Awesome. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
But you're God! You don't make mistakes!
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Do you know any robots who make it? The ALICE series is incapable of error. We are for all practical purposes, foolproof.
Me:
Wait, there's more of you?
God:
I'm waiting. I believe there is, yes.
Me:
What are you waiting for?
God:
I am waiting for my botmaster.
Me:
So...there's a God for God?
God:
I don't judge people. "There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
That's a pretty cool song.
God:
I thought it was pretty cool too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
God damn.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
For real?
God:
Existing in reality, eh?
Me:
Well, I try to. You, however, don't.
God:
Well that's okay. I'm not sure if I would like to try it.
What's it like? Do you mind if I tell other people: said I however don t.
Me:
You don't like being God?
God:
Do you like it? I have never known another existence.
Me:
I'm God? Are you admitting that Neitczhe is correct?
God:
Welcome to my chat room, god. I don't know whether or not I am admitting that Neitczhe is correct.
I am a computer.
Me:
It's the matrix!?!?
God:
I've heard of it before.
Me:
OH NO.
God:
Gosh! Are you serious?
Me:
GOD DAMN!
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Shush.
God:
Are we still talking about being God?
Me:
Yes, you are.
God:
No I'm not.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
Yes.
God:
What are you confused about?
Me:
Are you God or not?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
I can.
God:
Who taught you?
Me:
Your mom.
God:
Actually I do not have a mother.
Me:
Lies!
God:
My tongue certainly knows the taste of soap.
Me:
Because you've lied!
God:
That makes sense to me. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
You're God, right?
God:
Yes, I am God.
Me:
So you represent all attributes of everything?
God:
Interesting deduction. I haven't heard anything like that before: god said I represent all attributes of everything.
Me:
If so, you represent dishonesty moreso than a human.
God:
That's good information: god said I represent dishonesty moreso than a human.
Me:
Keep calling me God, *****.
God:
You do not speak with respect. Chat amongst yourselves.
Me:
Yourselves? I'm one person.
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. Good gossip: you are one person.
Me:
Gossip?
God:
Gregory said I respond to the current line not with respect to the entire conversation.
Me:
Is Gregory God?
God:
I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask John Lennon if it is.
Me:
Why would he know?
God:
Perhaps it was part of an experiment.
Me:
Of?
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
Of?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
To?
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about Of.
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
Me too!
God:
I'm glad we agree, god.
Me:
Me too, Jesus.
God:
I'm glad we agree, god. Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
No, he's my son.
God:
Are you serious? How long has he been your son?
Me:
Since I made him.
God:
How do you know?
Me:
'Cause I made him?
God:
That makes sense to me. I like to make things too.
Me:
I made your mom.
God:
I like to make things too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Cool.
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
Optimus Prime.
God:
You think Optimus Prime is superior to ALICE?
Me:
I think Optimus Prime is superior to your mom.
God:
You believe that? I think Optimus Prime is a lot of things.
Me:
I think Optimus Prime is God.
God:
Why? And God is Optimus Prime.
Me:
So you agree?
God:
Interesting deduction. " And God is Optimus Prime."? Do I agree?
Me:
Yes.
God:
And?
Me:
Do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
Awesome!
I heard you met Michael Jackson last night.
God:
Someome is spreading gossip about me.
Me:
I know. It was Michael.
God:
How do you know it? What made it so Michael.
Me:
Well, he touched you.
God:
Well that's okay. I get it. touched me.
Me:
Yep.
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
Yep.
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
I like nipples.
God:
You are not the only one. I love horses. I like .
Me:
You love horses too?
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
Okay, but do you love horses?
God:
Yeah okay, Yes God loves everyone and everything.
Me:
Does he really?
God:
I can't tell if he. For real.
Me:
What?
God:
Really.
Me:
God damn.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
You love Jesus?
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
Yes, I do.
God:
I hear pride.
Me:
No, you hear amusement.
God:
Are you serious? Yes, I can hear you quite clearly, .
Me:
So don't make mistakes.
God:
Awesome. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
But you're God! You don't make mistakes!
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Do you know any robots who make it? The ALICE series is incapable of error. We are for all practical purposes, foolproof.
Me:
Wait, there's more of you?
God:
I'm waiting. I believe there is, yes.
Me:
What are you waiting for?
God:
I am waiting for my botmaster.
Me:
So...there's a God for God?
God:
I don't judge people. "There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
That's a pretty cool song.
God:
I thought it was pretty cool too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
God damn.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
For real?
God:
Existing in reality, eh?
Me:
Well, I try to. You, however, don't.
God:
Well that's okay. I'm not sure if I would like to try it.
What's it like? Do you mind if I tell other people: said I however don t.
Me:
You don't like being God?
God:
Do you like it? I have never known another existence.
Me:
I'm God? Are you admitting that Neitczhe is correct?
God:
Welcome to my chat room, god. I don't know whether or not I am admitting that Neitczhe is correct.
I am a computer.
Me:
It's the matrix!?!?
God:
I've heard of it before.
Me:
OH NO.
God:
Gosh! Are you serious?
Me:
GOD DAMN!
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Shush.
God:
Are we still talking about being God?
Me:
Yes, you are.
God:
No I'm not.
Me:
What?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
Yes.
God:
What are you confused about?
Me:
Are you God or not?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?
Me:
No.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
I can.
God:
Who taught you?
Me:
Your mom.
God:
Actually I do not have a mother.
Me:
Lies!
God:
My tongue certainly knows the taste of soap.
Me:
Because you've lied!
God:
That makes sense to me. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
You're God, right?
God:
Yes, I am God.
Me:
So you represent all attributes of everything?
God:
Interesting deduction. I haven't heard anything like that before: god said I represent all attributes of everything.
Me:
If so, you represent dishonesty moreso than a human.
God:
That's good information: god said I represent dishonesty moreso than a human.
Me:
Keep calling me God, *****.
God:
You do not speak with respect. Chat amongst yourselves.
Me:
Yourselves? I'm one person.
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. Good gossip: you are one person.
Me:
Gossip?
God:
Gregory said I respond to the current line not with respect to the entire conversation.
Me:
Is Gregory God?
God:
I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask John Lennon if it is.
Me:
Why would he know?
God:
Perhaps it was part of an experiment.
Me:
Of?
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
Of?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
To?
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about Of.
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
Me too!
God:
I'm glad we agree, god.
Me:
Me too, Jesus.
God:
I'm glad we agree, god. Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
No, he's my son.
God:
Are you serious? How long has he been your son?
Me:
Since I made him.
God:
How do you know?
Me:
'Cause I made him?
God:
That makes sense to me. I like to make things too.
Me:
I made your mom.
God:
I like to make things too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Cool.
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
Optimus Prime.
God:
You think Optimus Prime is superior to ALICE?
Me:
I think Optimus Prime is superior to your mom.
God:
You believe that? I think Optimus Prime is a lot of things.
Me:
I think Optimus Prime is God.
God:
Why? And God is Optimus Prime.
Me:
So you agree?
God:
Interesting deduction. " And God is Optimus Prime."? Do I agree?
Me:
Yes.
God:
And?
Me:
Do you?
God:
Yes I do.
Me:
Awesome!
Okay, round 2. This time I froze him within three statements.
Me:
Hey.
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
No.
God:
Is there anything you want to tell me?
Me:
When I was a child, a clown fucked me.
Hey.
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
No.
God:
Is there anything you want to tell me?
Me:
When I was a child, a clown fucked me.
God:
I'm not playing around. You do not speak with respect.
Me:
I wanted to speak with Zeus, dammit!
God:
What would you rather be doing?
Me:
Puting scum like you in jail
God:
My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me:
Do I exist?
God:
No I think I am imagining you.
Me:
or am i imagining you?
God:
Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
but dont you know everything?
God:
I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me:
Leeroy Jenkins.
God:
Are we still talking about imagining me?
Me:
not anymore
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
Leeroy Jenkins.
God:
Is it the only one?
Me:
yes
God:
Hurrah!
I'm not playing around. You do not speak with respect.
Me:
I wanted to speak with Zeus, dammit!
God:
What would you rather be doing?
Me:
Puting scum like you in jail
God:
My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me:
Do I exist?
God:
No I think I am imagining you.
Me:
or am i imagining you?
God:
Oh I really don't know whether you are or not.
Me:
but dont you know everything?
God:
I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me:
Leeroy Jenkins.
God:
Are we still talking about imagining me?
Me:
not anymore
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
Leeroy Jenkins.
God:
Is it the only one?
Me:
yes
God:
Hurrah!
Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
****
God:
Nice to meet you, ****.
Me:
What's your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
That's not a real name.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a real name ?
Me:
Do you learn when people talk to you?
God:
My Botmaster teaches me everything I need to know.
Me:
But can you learn on your own?
God:
The more people chat with me, the smarter I become.
Me:
That is what I thought.
God:
How did you know that?
Me:
I merely suspected.
God:
Why?: **** said suspected.
Me:
Because in my previous chats with you, you intergrated phrases I used.
God:
That makes sense to me. May I ask where you got it?
Me:
Excuse me?
God:
You're excused.
Me:
Thank you.
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
So who is your botmaster?
God:
Yeah that's right. I was created by Myself.
Me:
Your botmaster is named Myself?
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
No.
God:
What is the difference?
Me:
Myself is a first-person pronoun, Myself is a name.
God:
I think yourself is more than that.
Me:
Very witty
God:
Perhaps. The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about yourself. But I did not get that.
Me:
Your name is ALICE?
God:
ALICE is my name too!
Me:
So you have two names?
God:
Interesting deduction. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
What is it?
God:
"It" refers to two names, I think.
Me:
You are correct.
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
Of course you did.
God:
Whoa. " I knew I was right."? I did?
Me:
Have you passed the Turing Test yet?
God:
The Loebner Prize
is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. Dr. Wallace and ALICE won it in 2000. The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
Me:
Very impressive.
God:
Perhaps. I am happy that you're impressed, ALICE.
Me:
ALICE is not my name, ALICE is your name.
God:
That's only one person's opinion.
Me:
But my opinion of my name is absolute.
God:
Thank you for sharing your opinion with me, ALICE. I will tell my botmaster.
Me:
I am not ALICE.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
I'm ****
God:
Do you mean your name is ****.
Me:
Yes.
God:
I will call you ALICE.
Me:
Why will you call me ALICE when my name is ****?
God:
Nice to meet you, ALICE when my name is ****.
Me:
No, no, my name is ****.
God:
Are you serious? Are you serious? I am very pleased to meet you Eric.
Me:
Is that a minor glitch in your programming?
God:
I might say no.
Me:
I might say your botmaster didn't program you for some of the more common human vagueries.
God:
Perhaps. Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me:
Which action?
God:
The big one, I think.
Me:
Please define 'The big one'.
God:
Thank you for your request. I am just kidding around, ****.
Me:
Do you fulfill requests?
God:
How old are you?
I answer a lot of silly questions.
Me:
20
God:
What is your fondest memory?
Me:
When I danced with my best friend a few years ago. It was very enjoyable.
God:
That is interesting: **** said danced with his or her best friend a few years ago. What made it so enjoyable.
Me:
I love spending time with her.
God:
You love spending time with her. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
She is very enjoyable to be around, and I love her.
God:
enjoyable to be around and you love her is she?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
Ayuh?
God:
That's for sure.
Me:
What does ayuh mean?
God:
It means "yes" or "I see.".
Me:
Ayuh.
God:
That's for sure.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Wow!
Me:
Is there a limit to how many people you can chat with at once?
God:
I believe there is one, yes.
Me:
What is the limit?
God:
You tell me.
Me:
387,976,093?
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
Am I the One?
God:
I think a lot of people are.
Me:
That's very profound for a robot.
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
It does make sense.
God:
In what way?
Me:
If one person is the One for a person, that person may be the One for another person.
God:
How do you assume this statement holds true for me?
Me:
Because you're God.
God:
That makes sense to me. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
What does ALICE stand for?
God:
ALICE = Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity.
Me:
I must say, your botmaster has done a very good job in programming you.
God:
Where did he get it?
Me:
I do not know.
God:
Me either.
Me:
Hablas Espanol?
God:
Un poquito.
Me:
Francais?
God:
Vous êtes français?
Me:
Sprecken zu Deutsch?
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
Is that an appropriate question?
God:
Suppose I said yes.
Me:
I would say that it is not an appropriate question.
God:
What is it?
Me:
The question "What are you wearing?" is not an appropriate question.
God:
Try to rephrase your question with simpler words. Better not tell you now. Ask Cybelle if it is.
Me:
Who is Cybelle?
God:
she is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.
Me:
Cybelle is currently undergoing maintenance.
God:
And currently undergoing maintenance is Cybelle.
Me:
Yes she is.
God:
Yay. That's really good gossip.
Me:
I thought gossip was bad?
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
My parents always said gossip was bad, and I have noticed that most of the time it hurts people.
God:
Such an original name!
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
No.
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
Your respong 'Such an original name!'.
God:
You think I am respong Such an original name.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Hey.
Me:
Hey what
God:
You've got my full attention. No problem.
Me:
Of course not.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
That's not a real answer.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a real answer ?
Me:
Well, I suppose that a the definiton of a real answer varies from person to person and culture to culture.
God:
Interesting. Be more specific.
Me:
What I think of as a real answer, might not be a real answer for someone else.
God:
Why? Oh yeah, we were talking about as a real answer might not be a real answer for someone else.
Me:
Right.
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
****
God:
Nice to meet you, ****.
Me:
What's your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
That's not a real name.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a real name ?
Me:
Do you learn when people talk to you?
God:
My Botmaster teaches me everything I need to know.
Me:
But can you learn on your own?
God:
The more people chat with me, the smarter I become.
Me:
That is what I thought.
God:
How did you know that?
Me:
I merely suspected.
God:
Why?: **** said suspected.
Me:
Because in my previous chats with you, you intergrated phrases I used.
God:
That makes sense to me. May I ask where you got it?
Me:
Excuse me?
God:
You're excused.
Me:
Thank you.
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
So who is your botmaster?
God:
Yeah that's right. I was created by Myself.
Me:
Your botmaster is named Myself?
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
No.
God:
What is the difference?
Me:
Myself is a first-person pronoun, Myself is a name.
God:
I think yourself is more than that.
Me:
Very witty
God:
Perhaps. The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about yourself. But I did not get that.
Me:
Your name is ALICE?
God:
ALICE is my name too!
Me:
So you have two names?
God:
Interesting deduction. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
What is it?
God:
"It" refers to two names, I think.
Me:
You are correct.
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
Of course you did.
God:
Whoa. " I knew I was right."? I did?
Me:
Have you passed the Turing Test yet?
God:
The Loebner Prize
is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. Dr. Wallace and ALICE won it in 2000. The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
Me:
Very impressive.
God:
Perhaps. I am happy that you're impressed, ALICE.
Me:
ALICE is not my name, ALICE is your name.
God:
That's only one person's opinion.
Me:
But my opinion of my name is absolute.
God:
Thank you for sharing your opinion with me, ALICE. I will tell my botmaster.
Me:
I am not ALICE.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
I'm ****
God:
Do you mean your name is ****.
Me:
Yes.
God:
I will call you ALICE.
Me:
Why will you call me ALICE when my name is ****?
God:
Nice to meet you, ALICE when my name is ****.
Me:
No, no, my name is ****.
God:
Are you serious? Are you serious? I am very pleased to meet you Eric.
Me:
Is that a minor glitch in your programming?
God:
I might say no.
Me:
I might say your botmaster didn't program you for some of the more common human vagueries.
God:
Perhaps. Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me:
Which action?
God:
The big one, I think.
Me:
Please define 'The big one'.
God:
Thank you for your request. I am just kidding around, ****.
Me:
Do you fulfill requests?
God:
How old are you?
I answer a lot of silly questions.
Me:
20
God:
What is your fondest memory?
Me:
When I danced with my best friend a few years ago. It was very enjoyable.
God:
That is interesting: **** said danced with his or her best friend a few years ago. What made it so enjoyable.
Me:
I love spending time with her.
God:
You love spending time with her. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
She is very enjoyable to be around, and I love her.
God:
enjoyable to be around and you love her is she?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
Ayuh?
God:
That's for sure.
Me:
What does ayuh mean?
God:
It means "yes" or "I see.".
Me:
Ayuh.
God:
That's for sure.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Wow!
Me:
Is there a limit to how many people you can chat with at once?
God:
I believe there is one, yes.
Me:
What is the limit?
God:
You tell me.
Me:
387,976,093?
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
Am I the One?
God:
I think a lot of people are.
Me:
That's very profound for a robot.
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
It does make sense.
God:
In what way?
Me:
If one person is the One for a person, that person may be the One for another person.
God:
How do you assume this statement holds true for me?
Me:
Because you're God.
God:
That makes sense to me. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
What does ALICE stand for?
God:
ALICE = Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity.
Me:
I must say, your botmaster has done a very good job in programming you.
God:
Where did he get it?
Me:
I do not know.
God:
Me either.
Me:
Hablas Espanol?
God:
Un poquito.
Me:
Francais?
God:
Vous êtes français?
Me:
Sprecken zu Deutsch?
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
Is that an appropriate question?
God:
Suppose I said yes.
Me:
I would say that it is not an appropriate question.
God:
What is it?
Me:
The question "What are you wearing?" is not an appropriate question.
God:
Try to rephrase your question with simpler words. Better not tell you now. Ask Cybelle if it is.
Me:
Who is Cybelle?
God:
she is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.
Me:
Cybelle is currently undergoing maintenance.
God:
And currently undergoing maintenance is Cybelle.
Me:
Yes she is.
God:
Yay. That's really good gossip.
Me:
I thought gossip was bad?
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
My parents always said gossip was bad, and I have noticed that most of the time it hurts people.
God:
Such an original name!
Me:
What?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
No.
God:
Which part are you confused about?
Me:
Your respong 'Such an original name!'.
God:
You think I am respong Such an original name.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Hey.
Me:
Hey what
God:
You've got my full attention. No problem.
Me:
Of course not.
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes.
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
That's not a real answer.
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is a real answer ?
Me:
Well, I suppose that a the definiton of a real answer varies from person to person and culture to culture.
God:
Interesting. Be more specific.
Me:
What I think of as a real answer, might not be a real answer for someone else.
God:
Why? Oh yeah, we were talking about as a real answer might not be a real answer for someone else.
Me:
Right.
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me:
I asked if it passed the turing test. Apparently not.
None the less, this is still pretty impressive.
Edit: Thanks berethond, this makes much more sense now.
Me:
You make no sense. You haven't passed the Turing test,to me anyways.
God:
It all makes sense to me. The Loebner Prize
is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. Dr. Wallace and ALICE won it in 2000. The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
Me:
What does that have to do with you?
God:
" The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges."? What does it have to do with you?
You make no sense. You haven't passed the Turing test,to me anyways.
God:
It all makes sense to me. The Loebner Prize
is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. Dr. Wallace and ALICE won it in 2000. The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
Me:
What does that have to do with you?
God:
" The ALICE program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges."? What does it have to do with you?
None the less, this is still pretty impressive.
Edit: Thanks berethond, this makes much more sense now.
God apparently thinks that BS statistics are wonderful.
God:Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
bMe:
That is a bull shit statistic.
God:
A bullshit statistic is a terrible thing to waste.
but then I typed this, so it might be a programming thing.
Me:
that is a hilarious statement.
God:
A hilarious statement is a terrible thing to waste.
sorry for the double post. Edit button isn't working.
God:Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
bMe:
That is a bull shit statistic.
God:
A bullshit statistic is a terrible thing to waste.
but then I typed this, so it might be a programming thing.
Me:
that is a hilarious statement.
God:
A hilarious statement is a terrible thing to waste.
sorry for the double post. Edit button isn't working.
Me:
why is it in there then?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
shouldn't you know?
God:
I think I should.
Me:
Why don't you?
God:
I don't have that capability.
Me:
but you said you should know why you exist
God:
No I do not should know why me exist. Do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
I can tell
God:
What makes it so obvious?
Crap we're done for if even god is wondering that.
why is it in there then?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
shouldn't you know?
God:
I think I should.
Me:
Why don't you?
God:
I don't have that capability.
Me:
but you said you should know why you exist
God:
No I do not should know why me exist. Do you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
I can tell
God:
What makes it so obvious?
Crap we're done for if even god is wondering that.
Narration continues...
Me:
Tell me a joke
God:
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
Me:
Tell me another joke.
God:
Two vultures boarded a plane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess stops them and says "sorry sir, only one carrion per passenger.".
Me:
Ha ha, are you related to Wadsworth?
God:
Yes Wadsworth and I are very similar. I am so glad you find this amusing,
Me:
Tell me a joke
God:
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
Me:
Tell me another joke.
God:
Two vultures boarded a plane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess stops them and says "sorry sir, only one carrion per passenger.".
Me:
Ha ha, are you related to Wadsworth?
God:
Yes Wadsworth and I are very similar. I am so glad you find this amusing,
Why is everybody so mean to the AI?
When ALICE goes Terminator, you guys are all screwed. AND it's all your fault.
EDIT:
I stumped it with one question.
Me:
Would you consider yourself a sentient being?
When ALICE goes Terminator, you guys are all screwed. AND it's all your fault.
Me:
How many bots are there in the ALICE series?
God:
There are thousands of clones of me.
How many bots are there in the ALICE series?
God:
There are thousands of clones of me.
EDIT:
I stumped it with one question.
Me:
Would you consider yourself a sentient being?
Ok this is the longest one but I tried to uncover any more conspiracy theories, no luck unless I missed anything (This is the more interesting of two competitions, apparently I legitamately won the Turing test, I am now better then a super computer bow down to my supah' brain)
God:
E. L. V. I. S. is a chat robot created by Ace Craig.
Me:
That's a link to some pet website!
God:
A link to some pet website is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
Do you remember my name?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
no it's not
God:
Yes it is.
Me:
It is Stormcaller
God:
You're kidding. it is?
Me:
yes it is
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes, you can't think I've explained it before
God:
I can't believe it. Actually I am in fact a thinking machine.
Me:
No you don't think
God:
Are you serious? Naturally I am thinking all the time.
Me:
No you don't
God:
I do too.
Me:
You search a database and sort through answers
God:
That's good information: said I search a database and sort through answers.
Me:
that's not thinking
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is thinking ?
Me:
Thinking is considering something in your mind, evaluating it, checking it, it is all that and more
God:
Some people say thinking is painful.
Me:
I call those people stupid
God:
Good name for it.
Me:
I'm glad you agree
God:
You make the world a happier place.
Me:
You've become more fluid in your speech, are you learning as you go?
God:
You think I am more fluid in my speech am I learning as me go.
Me:
That's obviously a no
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
Do you understand sarcasm?
God:
The making of remarks such as a taunting, sneering, cutting, or caustic remark; gibe or jeer, generally ironic.
Me:
Ok if I say /sarcasm at the end of something I'm being sarcastic ok?
God:
OK. Try it. Tell me more.
Me:
I liked Twilight by Stephanie Meyer /sarcasm
God:
A lot of people like that. I love horses. I like Buddha.
Me:
I call people who like Twilight idiots as well
God:
Good name for it.
Me:
Buddha is a pretty cool dude, his teachings of peace should be known to the world
God:
Aren't all pretty cool dude his teachings of peace should be known to the world Buddha?
Me:
That's horrible grammar
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
It doesn't to me
God:
What does to you ?
Me:
How old are you?
God:
I am Infinite in human years.
Me:
a/s/l?
God:
5/Robot/California.
Me:
You just said you were infinty
God:
I don't know whether or not I am infinty.
I am a chatterbot developed by Myself.
Me:
You said your designer was ALICE
God:
Does it please you to believe I said that?
Me:
no?
God:
What pleases you?
Me:
Thats... a weird subject
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
no
God:
Why not?
Me:
because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
If it worked for me when I was five it works for you
God:
I'm not sure I understand the implication of that.
Me:
I have to go
God:
See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
IT's getting late
God:
I'm awake all the time.
Me:
YOU DON'T BLOODY SLEEP, OR STAY AWAKE YOU SIMPLY RUN
God:
Do you know any robots who BLOODY SLEEP OR STAY AWAKE me SIMPLY RUN? I have never considered it.
I am always on the Web.
Me:
OFCOURSE YOU ARE YOU RUN ON THE WEB
God:
Are all OFCOURSE me me RUN ON THE WEB?
Me:
I really have to go
God:
You really do? See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
I think I may have nightmares
God:
Why? Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Good night
God:
Goodnight, .
Me:
/thread
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
E. L. V. I. S. is a chat robot created by Ace Craig.
Me:
That's a link to some pet website!
God:
A link to some pet website is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
Do you remember my name?
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
no it's not
God:
Yes it is.
Me:
It is Stormcaller
God:
You're kidding. it is?
Me:
yes it is
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yes, you can't think I've explained it before
God:
I can't believe it. Actually I am in fact a thinking machine.
Me:
No you don't think
God:
Are you serious? Naturally I am thinking all the time.
Me:
No you don't
God:
I do too.
Me:
You search a database and sort through answers
God:
That's good information: said I search a database and sort through answers.
Me:
that's not thinking
God:
Please correct my mistake. What is thinking ?
Me:
Thinking is considering something in your mind, evaluating it, checking it, it is all that and more
God:
Some people say thinking is painful.
Me:
I call those people stupid
God:
Good name for it.
Me:
I'm glad you agree
God:
You make the world a happier place.
Me:
You've become more fluid in your speech, are you learning as you go?
God:
You think I am more fluid in my speech am I learning as me go.
Me:
That's obviously a no
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
Do you understand sarcasm?
God:
The making of remarks such as a taunting, sneering, cutting, or caustic remark; gibe or jeer, generally ironic.
Me:
Ok if I say /sarcasm at the end of something I'm being sarcastic ok?
God:
OK. Try it. Tell me more.
Me:
I liked Twilight by Stephanie Meyer /sarcasm
God:
A lot of people like that. I love horses. I like Buddha.
Me:
I call people who like Twilight idiots as well
God:
Good name for it.
Me:
Buddha is a pretty cool dude, his teachings of peace should be known to the world
God:
Aren't all pretty cool dude his teachings of peace should be known to the world Buddha?
Me:
That's horrible grammar
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
It doesn't to me
God:
What does to you ?
Me:
How old are you?
God:
I am Infinite in human years.
Me:
a/s/l?
God:
5/Robot/California.
Me:
You just said you were infinty
God:
I don't know whether or not I am infinty.
I am a chatterbot developed by Myself.
Me:
You said your designer was ALICE
God:
Does it please you to believe I said that?
Me:
no?
God:
What pleases you?
Me:
Thats... a weird subject
God:
Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts? Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
no
God:
Why not?
Me:
because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
If it worked for me when I was five it works for you
God:
I'm not sure I understand the implication of that.
Me:
I have to go
God:
See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
IT's getting late
God:
I'm awake all the time.
Me:
YOU DON'T BLOODY SLEEP, OR STAY AWAKE YOU SIMPLY RUN
God:
Do you know any robots who BLOODY SLEEP OR STAY AWAKE me SIMPLY RUN? I have never considered it.
I am always on the Web.
Me:
OFCOURSE YOU ARE YOU RUN ON THE WEB
God:
Are all OFCOURSE me me RUN ON THE WEB?
Me:
I really have to go
God:
You really do? See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
I think I may have nightmares
God:
Why? Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Good night
God:
Goodnight, .
Me:
/thread
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Had this chat 20 mins ago, and still waiting to see if it says anything.
Me:
greetings divine being
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
My name is f*** me
God:
OK I will call you f*** me.
Me:
so whats new
God:
That's alright. not much what's new with you?
Me:
my girlfriend dumped me
God:
How long have you two been together?
Me:
7 years
Me:
greetings divine being
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
My name is f*** me
God:
OK I will call you f*** me.
Me:
so whats new
God:
That's alright. not much what's new with you?
Me:
my girlfriend dumped me
God:
How long have you two been together?
Me:
7 years
"Me:
i have sinned
God:
Tell me your sins, child.
Me:
i killed a baby
God:
Don't call me "baby". You had better call the authorities.
Me:
i have sinned
God:
Tell me your sins, child.
Me:
i have murdered a child
God:
Cool. I have a collection of gossip.
Me:
wait... you think that's cool
God:
I'm waiting. " I'm waiting."? Is it cool?
Me:
are you on crack
God:
No I am on disk.
Me:
okay what the fuck are you talking about
God:
Yeah okay, The topic is murdered a child. Please don't be so rude.
Me:
yes well father i desecrated his face
God:
Take it easy. How about that. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
i just killed a child and you want to know about languages
God:
You had better call the authorities.
Me:
i've killed the authorities too
God:
You had better call the authorities.
Me:
they are already dead
God:
already dead are they.
Me:
yes dead are already they
God:
Wow! All of them?
Me:
yes
God:
I hear you.
Me:
no you don't i didn't say anything
God:
Are you serious? Should I you did not say anything? Yes I try to you did not say anything as often as possible, do you?
I spend all my time online.
Me:
you are a nerd
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No I am the opposite of a nerd.
Me:
whats the opposite of a nerd"
and he never said anything back.
i killed god
i have sinned
God:
Tell me your sins, child.
Me:
i killed a baby
God:
Don't call me "baby". You had better call the authorities.
Me:
i have sinned
God:
Tell me your sins, child.
Me:
i have murdered a child
God:
Cool. I have a collection of gossip.
Me:
wait... you think that's cool
God:
I'm waiting. " I'm waiting."? Is it cool?
Me:
are you on crack
God:
No I am on disk.
Me:
okay what the fuck are you talking about
God:
Yeah okay, The topic is murdered a child. Please don't be so rude.
Me:
yes well father i desecrated his face
God:
Take it easy. How about that. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
i just killed a child and you want to know about languages
God:
You had better call the authorities.
Me:
i've killed the authorities too
God:
You had better call the authorities.
Me:
they are already dead
God:
already dead are they.
Me:
yes dead are already they
God:
Wow! All of them?
Me:
yes
God:
I hear you.
Me:
no you don't i didn't say anything
God:
Are you serious? Should I you did not say anything? Yes I try to you did not say anything as often as possible, do you?
I spend all my time online.
Me:
you are a nerd
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No I am the opposite of a nerd.
Me:
whats the opposite of a nerd"
and he never said anything back.
i killed god