One of my best friend left me! please help!

[Lord Mountbatten Reborn]

When I found out my friend of 8 years was gay, my first reaction was to say

"So your a gay man now?" in an Irish accent. (get the quote, win a prize)

Excellent response. It would be my first if my friend (who we all know is gay) publicly outed himself. Of course, I don't think he will, since we go to a school in Leeds, in the north of England, which consists mostly of orange girls, homophobic guys, racists etc. Most of the people there are complete idiots, and even some of the smarter ones think being gay is still a choice.

I woke up this morning and finally decided to be straight. That ever happen? Nope.

Why is everyone calling him a homophobe?

Chances are nobody here would know how to react, if their best friend suddenly turned gay over night(I know that's not what happens, but as one doesn't know anything until one day, that's what really transpires) let alone if we weren't told.

Even if it's a "trust" thing, it would still show that friend to be immensely ignorant. Unless they live in Happy McUnderstanding land, the fact he put off coming out isn't really that hard to understand. The fact that the friend might not understand why shows him to be ignorant. Either way, bad friend, although if he was ignorant it doesn't mean they shouldn't be friends.

Homophobe = bad friend.

Ignorant = good friend, but will need time.

Or, "that clarifies the things that happened at those sleepovers!" But I'd consider that unlikely.

Edit: Oh wait, no, I see the hitting on part. Oh dear. That would explain it. Actually, the gay friend I mentioned above also did that once. I think it was funny, and since learning of his homosexuality have not changed the way I act around him at all.

 

[Lord Mountbatten Reborn]

If your friend is more important, consider not being gay. If your self identity is more important consider losing that friend. It's that simply really.

The dilemma right now is how to keep your friend at the same type keep being gay I assume. But you need to always consider the possibility that you have to choose one over the other, and sometime that's the only possibility. Might as well just make the decision right now than later.

Biological processes are so easy to override after all.

 

[KiKiweaky]

Hmm doesnt sound like much of a friend if he's stopped talking to you once he found out.

I wouldn't worry to much about it.

 

[Mr. Google]

OMG insert homophobic remark here saying something bad about gays. in all seriousness though im sorry to hear that and yeah im guessing the hitting on him thing freaked him out when he thought back to it

 

[Blue Musician]

He is not your friend, if he doesn't respects you for what you are, just leave him and be done with it...

 

[sky14kemea]

One of my best friend just stopped talking to me because he found out i was gay, please give me some advice, what should i try to do in order for me to get him back? i don't wanna lose him. I knew him since sixth grade, that was about 4 years ago and yes i tried hitting on him... think thats why he was shocked.

I'm not surprised by the amount of "Screw him, he's a douche" comments, but sometimes hearing life changing news like that from someone you thought you knew really well is shocking. I think you need to give him a bit of space, then try talking to him after he seems calmer about it. :L Remember to tell him that nothing really is gonna change, cept that instead of you admiring a girls ass, it'll be a guys. *lame attempt at a joke*.

I wish I'd had a similar experience so I could give better advice, but when we found out someone in our group of friends was gay, we weren't that surprised (Although I was a bit disappointed since he'd been trying to date some of my female friends in the last few years before he came out. Now that I think about it that was probably because he was confused.) >_>

Anyways, sorry to hear about you and your friend! I hope you guys make up again soon. =[

 

[Snowpact]

Someone once told me: 'If a friend seizes to be a friend, he was never a friend at all'

Find better friends that appreciate you for who and what you are.

 

[Ziadaine_v1legacy]

I think it's a shock, especially since you did hit on him. just explain it to him. I did the same with a friend of mine and even though they joke about me being Bi i always say I wouldn't ever go near my friends "that way".

Followed usually by a punch if they don't stop it.

 

[FallenJellyDoughnut]

Beat the living shit out of him. If he won't talk to you because hes homophobic, show him what it is to be truly afraid of you.

Ignorant bastard.

Really?

I... wha... what is this I don't even...

The amount of 'liberals' on this site who actively advocate violence over other peoples perspectives (yet are probably the same people demanding freedom of speech whenever they want a soup box) simply astonishes me.

Your post doesn't even make sense.

Someone have a prejudice about you? Prove their prejudice correct. That oughta show them. I don't see why this isn't a bannable post. I will contact a mod.

How is it bannable? I'm not really serious to be honest, I just HATE homophobic people who think gays or muslims are evil just because they're not normal. They deserve to get a good hammering. That and homophobic people don't really fear them, they just hate them, so maybe we need a new word for it.

 

[Mr.Mattress]

Forget him and find a new friend. If you really can't stand loosing him as a pal, then try to get him to talk to you.

 

[FallenJellyDoughnut]

Beat the living shit out of him. If he won't talk to you because hes homophobic, show him what it is to be truly afraid of you.

Ignorant bastard.

Really?

I... wha... what is this I don't even...

The amount of 'liberals' on this site who actively advocate violence over other peoples perspectives (yet are probably the same people demanding freedom of speech whenever they want a soup box) simply astonishes me.

Your post doesn't even make sense.

Someone have a prejudice about you? Prove their prejudice correct. That oughta show them. I don't see why this isn't a bannable post. I will contact a mod.

How is it bannable? I'm not really serious to be honest, I just HATE homophobic people who think gays or muslims are evil just because they're not normal. They deserve to get a good hammering.

Well its up to the mods now. You'll probably get by without any moderation because its not racist or sexist. They don't seem to care when a possible 'real' crime is committed. Honestly mate, the only people who deserve to get bashed are those who go around telling people to bash eachother (or actually bashing people).

Alright then, they deserve a stern talking to regarding their blatant and willing prejudice.

EDIT also, I should probably state that "Beat the living shit out of him" was an overstatement, I just meant he needed sense knocked into him, not curb stomped to the ground or anything.

 

[Ickorus]

No offence but perhaps you shouldn't flirt with friends you know aren't gay.

Your friend probably has the same stance as me on gay people, doesn't matter so long as you don't flirt with me or tell me about your sexual endeavours.

 

[BrionJames]

I have a few gay friends. Maybe because he has known you for so long that he's a little stunned. Hitting on him probably didn't help this, but you should give him a chance to come to terms with it. I'm sure he'll be a little weird about it but if he's your best friend then he'll eventually get over it.

 

[DarkPanda XIII]

4 years ain't much, 8-10 or so would be touching it. But by then he probably figured out you were gay. *shrugs* That is all.